Will you be there when I fall?
by Blink182lover4life
Summary: Bella leaves her small hometown with a HUGE secret! She moves to California where she meets the Cullen family and Edward! The biggest player in the school. Will she open up to him...or will HE open up to her? Full and better summary inside. Hiatus.
1. Be my escape

**Summary:**Bella is just your average small town, tomboyish, stubborn yet shy, seventeen year old girl. Pretty normal, right? Well, not really, did I mention that Bella has a secret? No? Must have slipped my mind. Throw in a cheating and abusive boyfriend, alcoholic parents, and a secret that would make any person cower in a mixture of fear and pity and what do you have? A not-so-perfect life, right? Thought so. So anyway, Bella finally gets the nerve to leave her small town behind. She moves to California in hopes that she will finally have a chance at a normal life. Lesson learned.....never trust a school news flier....they tend to lie. Watch how Bella meets Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie, Alice, and, of course, Edward. (the biggest player in the school.) But will Bella tell her new friends her darkest, deepest secret? Or will she always push away the people she cares about? Will she open up to Edward? Or will Edward open up to her? Read and find out!

**Disclaimer:**I do not own, nor will I ever own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Or Breaking Dawn. They all belong to the wonderful author Stephanie Meyer. Any of the songs you see are NOT written by me, they all belong to their respectable owners. No copyright infringement intended.

**Warning:** This is my first fanfic on , so therefore, it may suck. Their will be a lot of song writing in this fanfiction. If you do not like that then either skip those parts or just don't read. Their will also be a lot of songs repeating themselves. (Maybe, I haven't quite decided yet:)

**Pairings:**Eddie/Bella, Alice/Jazzy, Emmy/Rose, Carlisle/Esme, Jacob/Angela, and Victoria/James.

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"Mom, I'm home!" I yelled as I threw down my back-pack, I didn't get an answer....but I really didn't expect one. I went quietly into the living room, only to find my mother passed out on the couch. Surrounding her was two and half empty bottles of Vodka. Figures, I glanced at the clock, Phil should have been home by now. Then again he was probably at a bar, making up for the lost time when he wasn't allowed to drink. Phil is my step-dad, he is really nice, but like my mom, he is an alcoholic in denial. I quickly did my afternoon routine, I put a pillow under my mother's head, I put a blanket over her, and I cleaned up the vodka bottles. Next, I took a warm washcloth and tried to soak up the spilt beer and vodka, then I put some really good smelling stain remover over it. After that, I threw the washcloth in the dirty laundry, cleaned the rest of the house, put some pain killers by the table so when my mom woke up, she wouldn't have to deal with a hangover. Then I set a towel by the toilet in the bathroom, for when my mom would throw up.

After I was done with my chores, I went upstairs, I had already finished my homework at school, like I do every day, so I was completely bored. Five minutes had past by and so I decided to play my guitar. After an hour I glanced at the clock again. Time to go, I thought. I quickly grabbed my jacket and snuck out my window. I then ran down town and waited for the others to arrive. I guess your probably wondering what the hell I'm doing huh? Well, I'm in a band, I'm the lead singer actually, but I play guitar and piano. My parents don't know, but I don't really think they care. Still, it would be nice to go on stage singing and see your parents smiling and shouting your name proudly. But I guess I'll never see that though.

I guess I should introduce my my band mates. James is my bass player, he's two years older than me, (I'm seventeen by the way) and he has long shoulder length blond hair and blue eyes. Victoria, she's my drummer, she's also Jame's girlfriend (same age). She has long curly red hair, and green eyes, and like me and James, pale skin. Laurent is my guitar player, he has beautiful, dark brown skin, chocolate colored eyes, and black dreadlocks.

That pretty much sums up the band, and for the record they all do the back up vocals and harmonies, but for some songs, it's just me and Victoria. Anyway, so after they arrived, James signed us up and we were told to go on in 15 min. While we were waiting, James and Laurent went to get the equipment. "So, Bella, How was today?" asked Victoria. She and the others were the only ones who knew about my parents. But none of them knew about my...other secret...and I didn't plan on telling them anytime soon. "fine, fine....and yours?" I asked, knowing that she knew something wasn't right. All the more reason to want to leave this small town. "It was....okay." she said hesitantly, I think she was still worried about me. Victoria was like my big sister, she was their for me when I would come home crying. She was also their for me when I use to go to her house with bruises and cuts all over me. She would always doctor me up and make me feel better. James, was like my big brother, very protective and caring. Laurent, on the other hand was more like my best friend. I could confide anything in him and he would always take my side, no matter the cause. But as much as I love them, I have to say that I can't trust them as much as I once did. In fact, I can't say that I can trust anyone the same again. Ever since last year, I've been like that. And it's all because of _him._

Just then James and Laurent came back with guitars, amps, drums, speakers, a piano set, a keyboard, picks, basses, and last but not least, my microphone case. Victoria and I went over to help them, trying not to laugh at their very tired state. James gave Victoria a kiss on the cheek and I just laughed at Laurent. "Guys, your on in five." A lanky man with a microphone head set, said. Then he disappeared behind the curtain. We quickly set up are individual equipment. "Alright are you guys ready for some awesome rock quality music?" We heard the man yell, we quickly got into our places as the curtain went up, "Then give it up for the talented Isabella Swan, and her band!" As soon as the curtain went up I heard the screams of the crowd. I smiled, I loved this feeling, the feeling you get right before you go on stage. Some people hate it, probably because their nervous, but for me...it's different, I actually feel.......loved. "Thank you! All right!....This is one of my earlier songs that I wrote. I really hope you guys like it!" I said and smiled again.

_Are you aware of what you make me feel, baby?_

_Right now I feel invisible to you, like I'm not real._

_Didn't you feel me lock my arms around you?_

_Why'd you turn away, here's what I have to say._

_I was left to cry there, waiting outside there, grinning with a lost stare._

_That's when I decided..._

_Why should I care, cause you weren't their when I was scared._

_I was so alone. _

_You, you need to listen. I'm starting to trip,_

_I'm losing my grip and I'm in this thing alone._

_(Losing Grip, by Avril Lavigne)_

After I was finished with that song I immediately went into the second one,

_I can not find a way to describe it._

_It's there in side, all I do is hide._

_I wish that it would just go away._

_What would you do, you do if you knew?_

_What would you do?_

_Of all the pain, I thought I knew._

_All my thoughts lead back to you._

_Back to what was never said, _

_back in forth, inside my head._

_I can't handle this confusion._

_I'm unable come and take me away._

_(Take me away, by Avril Lavigne)_

After we were done, I was going to sing three more songs.

They pretty much were Perfect world, (by Simple Plan) Crazy, (by Simple Plan) and Together.(by Avril Lavigne). So after that I glanced at the clock and realized that I was late. panicking, I looked at Victoria, who gave me a nod in reassurance that she was here if I needed her. I packed up and ran home. Phil was back, and my mom was awake. Damn. I quietly snuck through my bedroom window and went down stairs, "Hey Mom, Dad, what's for dinner?" I asked. But I just got two mean glares, "Isabella Marie Swan! How DARE you sneak out!" I looked at them, surprised that they were both sober enough to even know what was going on. "What are you talking about, I was upstairs, in my room." I said. Phil just glared at me, "The hell you were! We were just up their!" I heard the booming sound his voice made. "Look, I'm sorry, it won't happen again!" I swore, but of course, I was lying. "Would you mind keeping it down, we're not exactly in the best of moods to deal with you!" snapped Mom. It was my turn to glare, I'd had it with them, and I was royally pissed off, "Oh shut up, don't give me that crap! How many times do I come home and find your drunk asses passed out on the couch! How do you think I feel when I have to take care of you!" I yelled, I loved my parents but after seventeen years of this shit I had finally cracked. Mom and Phil just glared at me. "Go up to your room!....NOW!" yelled my Mom. I scowled, "Good, now I won't have to be near a drunk ass bitch!" *Slap* I now grasped my swelling red cheek. I looked at Mom who was now red with anger. I glared at her as tears stung the brim of my eyes, "Look what it's doing to you Mom." I whispered as I turned around and ran upstairs. The last thing I saw before I slammed my door was the guilty shock on both my Mom's and Phil's faces.

I put my face in my pillow and screamed as loud as I could, I did this until my voice went hoarse. That's when I heard a quiet knock, I slowly got up and tried to dry my eyes, but it still looked as though I was crying. I opened the door to find my mother and step father standing outside it. Mom was crying, and Phil just looked guilty. "What?" I croaked, Mom jumped at the sound of my voice. "Honey, I'm so sorry, I wasn't thinking, and I was mad and I couldn't stop myself!" She cried as she hugged me. I didn't hug her back though, I just stood there, my face was blank and my eyes, unreadable. Mom looked up to me, I just looked down to her, "What's the matter sweetie? Oh! Please tell me you forgive me!" she said worried. I couldn't stand this for one more second, I watched her face as tears formed and ran down my cheeks, "I'm sorry Mom, but you never listen, and if I forgive you, you won't change." I said. I watched my mom break down and cry, and I tried not to cry anymore, but that was impossible. I just turned around and started to pack my clothes. "W-where are you going?" asked Mom as her voice cracked. "I'm leaving." I simply stated.

After I was finished I went towards the door, I looked back at my parents, "Mom, Dad, please don't go about this the wrong way. I've tried for many years to tell you how I felt about your drinking habits, and whether you remember or not, this is not the first time you have hit me. I love you both, but I'm not coming home until you guys get some help. I suggest checking into rehab or doing something productive. I'm sorry, Goodbye, and I love you." and with that, I walked out the door.

I didn't want to leave, but I had to. I didn't know whether they would take my advice or if I had just made things a whole lot worse, but either way I was free. But I didn't exactly feel free, instead I felt overwhelmed and scared. I had no place to go...what can I do? It was then that I decided to take the opportunity to ditch this old town and have a better life. but how? Where would I go? I had no job and no money! I was now walking by the town's old dump when I stepped into a mud puddle. "Dammit!" I muttered as I looked down. It was then that I found something that would help me out a great deal. A flier. I picked it up and quickly read it; _Come now to the Cali Highschool in Sandiego, California! Located just north of Penny Avenue on 3980 West point!_ I reread the flier again and with not really thinking about what I was doing, whipped out my cell phone and with shaking hands, dialed my school's number, _"Hello, and welcome to Forks, Washington High school, sorry we are unavailable now but if you leave your name and phone number we will get back with you as soon as possible." _I heard the machine say, I took a deep breath and cleared my throat. I then made the tone in my voice, the exact tone of that in which my mother would use, "Hello, Principle Stanley? This is Isabella Swan's mother, Renee', and I would just like to inform you that Bella will no longer be attending Forks High school, due to job circumstances concerning me and her father, all that I ask is that you transfer her records to the highschool in Sandiego, California, one names Cali-High. Thank you, bye, bye." After that, the guilt that I had been consciously ignoring consumed me and I ran to Victoria's house. I wasn't surprised to see James and Laurent there and from the look on Victoria's face, the anger on James' and Laurent's, and the guilt on mine, I knew, that they knew what happened. "I'm sorry." I whispered as I cried, Victoria came and hugged me, followed by James and Laurent. "I didn't know what to do, so I left....I'm so sorry, I have no place to go, I'm sorry." I kept repeating, but Victoria just hugged me tighter, "Shhh, it's all right, you can stay here. We'll protect you, don't worry." she said, her words soothed me and I was soon falling asleep.

The next thing I knew I was in a bed, and the sun was out. I slowly got up and went into Victoria's kitchen. Victoria looked at me and smiled, "Hey you, how was your night?" I smiled and looked to the floor, "It was fine." I said, that's when James cleared his throat. "Bells, we have a plan..." I looked up to him confused, "What do you mean?" I asked, Laurent sighed, "Well, because you quit school, bailed on your parents, and have nowhere to go...we came up with two options; either undo what you've already done or give you a change of scenery by following the previous plan you had in mind. Obviously, we all agreed that you'd take the second choice so... we're moving to California." I allowed a smile to consume my face for a total minute before I frowned. Unlike me, James and the gang all liked Forks...a lot. So if they were moving...that meant that they were going to give up their happiness for me. "What's wrong Bells? You don't like that idea?" Asked Victoria, I sighed, "Thanks guys, but I will not allow you give up your love for Forks because of me." Victoria smiled, "True, we don't want to move, but because of your impulsive decision, it got us all thinking about our future last night. Obviously, when we quit school, we were out of high school...but before you told us it was because of your parents...we thought that the reason you quit was because we all did...and so we all agreed that we did kind of miss school and with a lot of thought, James, Laurent and myself have all decided to go back to college. So we applied to some colleges and quite a few excepted us, but we chose California State University because they also have a high school about a mile away from the college." I looked at James, Laurent, and Victoria with wide eyes, "So...I get to go and live with you guys in California! You mean it?!" James chuckled, "Yes." I squealed and hugged them each one tightly. "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" I said as I let go of them, they were all laughing.

"There's just one problem." Said Victoria, my expression immeadiatly became grave, "What?" I could see her try to hide a smile, "When are we going to go school shopping?" I laughed and hugged her. Then I became worried again, "Um...guys,...how are we going to afford all of this?" Everyone looked at James, he smiled gravely, "As you know, my last living relative just passed away and he happened to be my grandpa." He said, the rest of us nodded, urging him to continue, "Well they found his will and apparently he had saved up over twelve million dollars and in his will, he said that when he passed away it was I who would get the inheritance." I looked at Victoria, and Laurent, but they were looking at me with amused expressions. So apparently they already knew. I looked back at James, "So you have twelve million dollars in the bank right now?" James nodded. "Cool!" I said and nearly fell off the table, everyone else laughed.

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**Hey, thanks for reading. So what did you think of the first chapter? Was it good? Bad? Horrible? Horrifying? Do I continue or do I stop...that is the question. Your reviews will help stop me from worrying. So please R&R. Thanks. Bye!**

**Sincerely,**

**Blink182lover4life.**


	2. California bound

**Summary:**Bella is just your average small town, tomboyish, stubborn yet shy, seventeen year old girl. Pretty normal, right? Well, not really, did I mention that Bella has a secret? No? Must have slipped my mind. Throw in a cheating and abusive boyfriend, alcoholic parents, and a secret that would make any person cower in a mixture of fear and pity and what do you have? A not-so-perfect life, right? Thought so. So anyway, Bella finally gets the nerve to leave her small town behind. She moves to California in hopes that she will finally have a chance at a normal life. Lesson learned.....never trust a school news flier....they tend to lie. Watch how Bella meets Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie, Alice, and, of course, Edward. (the biggest player in the school.) But will Bella tell her new friends her darkest, deepest secret? Or will she always push away the people she cares about? Will she open up to Edward? Or will Edward open up to her? Read and find out!

**Disclaimer:**I do not own, nor will I ever own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Or Breaking Dawn. They all belong to the wonderful author Stephanie Meyer. Any of the songs you see are NOT written by me, they all belong to their respectable owners. No copyright infringement intended.

**Pairings:**Eddie/Bella, Alice/Jazzy, Emmy/Rose, Carlisle/Esme, Jacob/Angela, and Victoria/James.

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California. Sweet n' sunny California. I thought as we loaded the last bit of baggage onto the plane, I was nervous and scared. I hadn't seen my parents since last night. I wonder what they are doing right now?

Who knows, anyway I got on the plane and sat next to Laurent. I could have sat next to James and Victoria, but when they started making out I decided against it. So here I sat bored as ever, I had absolutely nothing to do.

I started to play my guitar...but then the lady assistant told me that I was disturbing the peace. Yeah right. I even tried reading...though I couldn't concentrate at all on the book. So I just decided to try and sleep. Apparently that worked out better than the other things and before I knew it I was on my way to dreamland.

I woke up a few hours later, It was just starting to get dark. I went back to sleep only to wake up two hours later, because the plane was landing. James caught us all a taxi, and we all crammed in to go to the house that James had bought just after his inheritance kicked in.

We got their around nine o' clock that night. It was very spacious, it had three rooms, a kitchen, an office, two bathrooms, and last but not least the living area. It was huge! It had a wrap around leather sofa, a massive flat screen TV. a coffee table, a beautiful white carpet, white smooth walls, and a huge pair of glass sliding doors. Which led to the most beautiful scenery ever. It looked out over a lake, like a privet swim whole just for us.

All of us just stood their, mouths agape, even James! "Oh...My...God..." said Victoria, but the rest of us were lost for words. Finally we overcame our shock and started to unpack. I went into my bedroom. It had a queen sized bed, white walls, and carpet, a desk, a nightstand, and a balcony. It wasn't a big balcony, but it was just the right size for me. I had only been here five minutes and I was already in love with this house. But I would definitely have to splash my room with some color, and maybe add a TV. or a phone and computer.

After I was finished packing I went out into the living room, and turned on the tv. I heard James and Victoria coming out of their rooms, then I heard Laurent coming out of the office. Which would now be known as Laurent's room.

The office was a pretty spacious room, maybe a little bit smaller than the other rooms, but only by a couple inches. I would have gladly taken it, in fact I was going to take it until Laurent insisted that I get a real bedroom. One of the many reasons why I love Laurent. The others came and joined me on the couch to watch some TV.

After an hour of that I went to bed. I was going to have to get up very early tomorrow. Oh how I hated the first day of school.

Morning came pretty fast, and unfortunately we were all unfortunately blessed by the screeching alarm clock coming out of Laurent's bedroom.

"LAURENT! SHUT THAT GOD DAMN THING OFF!" I heard Victoria yell,

I groaned and put the pillow over my head and tried to go back to sleep. But to no avail, for the very next moment, Laurent busted through my door singing to the top of his lungs "Breakfast is ready, time to get up and go to school!"

I groaned again, and threw a pillow at him. He should know by now that I'm not, nor will I ever be a morning person.

Clearly, I wasn't the only non existing-morning person, because James and Victoria looked just as tired as I did.

I chuckled silently as they glared at Laurent with a hateful passion. Then I laughed out loud when their faces suddenly became happy at the sight of bacon, eggs, and toast.

After breakfast, I went to take a quick shower, and get dressed.

With a little help from Victoria I finally agreed on what I should wear. Which happened to be my wonderful black lucky jeans, my converse sneakers, and my white long sleeve shirt with a black tee shirt over it. I wore little make, just eyeliner, and eyshadow, and lip gloss.

After I was ready I called a taxi and waited for it to come. While I was waiting I decided to clean the kitchen.

"Hey Bella." I jumped and nearly dropped a cup that I was cleaning,

"Oh, James, you scared the living shit outta me!" I said,

I could see James fighting off the urge to smile, "Listen Bella, this is your fist day of school, so, behave, and have fun, try and make some friends, and for any dickheads who try to hurt you just call me, and I'll make sure they have a nice trip to the hospital, okay?"

I rolled my eyes, "Geez, you sound like Charlie. Relax _Dad_, this isn't kindergarten, I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself." James smiled, "Love ya! Come on Guys!" he said as Victoria and Laurent came out of their bedrooms. I smiled, "Love you too, guys. Have a great day!" Victoria smiled and winked at me.

I was just finished cleaning when the taxi pulled up in front of the house, I climbed inside and smiled at the cab driver, "Please go to Cali-High school." The man gave a rough nod.

I arrived at school 10 minutes early and entered the school. I went straight to the principle's office. "Um...hello, my name is Isabella Swan....and I'm a new student here at Cali-High." I told the receptionist.

She smiled, "Hello Mrs. Swan, I am Mrs. Cope, here is your schedule, if you need any help just ask one of the students, I'm sure they will be delighted to help you. Have a nice day."

I smiled in return and I left the office just as the first warning bell rang.

"Dammit!" I muttered as I accidentally bumped into some one.

"Oh sorry!" I heard the soprano voice say,

I looked up only to find to pairs of eyes staring back at me, rather closely.

"Um...yeah, me too." I mumbled as I picked myself up.

"So what's your name?" the girl asked.

It took me a minute to comprehend that, I was to busy staring at how beautiful this girl was. She had black, short, pixie-like hair, Beautiful blue eyes, her complexion was clear and pretty, and her skin was pale. She had a dark purple t-shirt on and light faded jeans, and last but not least the same pair of converse as me.

"Um...hello...anyone there?" I heard the girl say as she waved her hand in front of my face.

"Ah, what?" I asked. _Well that was real smart Bella, act like an incompetent idiot! I thought_.

"I said what's your name?" she said again, though she didn't seem agitated.

"Isabella Swan." I said flatly, "But you can call me Bella, I'm new here." I watched as her face lit up,

"Oh! I knew you didn't look familiar here! My name ia Alice Cullen...and this is my best friend, Rosalie Hale." she said excitedly. I turned to look at the girl beside her, I didn't even see her until Alice pointed her out. When I looked at the girl beside Alice, I took a really big blow to my self-esteem. She. Was. Gorgeous. Long, mid length, golden blond hair, beautiful, sky blue eyes, and an hourglass shape, no doubt about it.

She wore a peach colored shirt with a silver locket, and a pair of skinny blue jeans, and converse.

My mouth hung open and I just stared. "Um...hi...is there something wrong?" I heard her say.

I shook off my shock, "No, no, It's just that...you girls are probably the most prettiest girls I've ever seen."

Alice laughed, "Well thank you. Hey! what to you have for first class?" I let her look at my schedule.

"Trig! That's the same as Rose!" I looked at Rosalie, she smiled and motioned for me to follow her.

I waved goodbye to Alice and caught up with Rose.

"So, how do like it here so far?" she asked,

I could feel the awkward tension between us, it was kind of nerve wracking...I was never really good at making friends.

"It's um...pretty good, I just moved here from Washington." Her face lit up,

"Really? Where at in Washington?" I sighed, talking about Forks was painful, "It's was a small town, called Forks."

Her face scrunched up, "Never heard of it." I laughed hardly, "Yeah, it was a pretty small town, always raining, never any sun."

She smiled, "Well, I'm sure you and your parents are glad to get away from that dreary place, no offense." She added the last part quickly, I smiled, a sad smile,

"Actually, I am glad to get away from Forks...but my parents didn't come with me. I moved here with my band..." I looked at Rose, she was shocked, no doubt.

"Oh, this isn't any of my business, but why didn't your parents come?" I thought about this, what was I going to say...definitely not the truth, "They...were....having problems.....money trouble....but they wanted me to get out of Forks so....they arranged for me to leave..." I said, I felt bad lying, but I really had no choice. Rosalie had tears in her eyes, "Oh, I'm so sorry, it was none of my business." I laughed, "It's okay."

As soon as we entered Trigonometry, I glanced around the room, I looked over at Rosalie who was pointing to a seat by her.

On my way their I tripped and fell onto a platinum blond girl. Her scream sounded like fingernails scratching a chalkboard,

"YOU BITCH!" she yelled, I looked at her with wide eyes, "I'm sorry, it was an accident!" I said panicky.

The last thing I wanted to do was make an enemy my very first day.

The girl looked up at me with hatred all on her face, "It, doesn't matter, now I have to go by me another top because you wrinkled it!" she yelled at me again.

I clenched my jaw, screw the first day, "Well that won't be too much of a problem...I mean you have to go to the store anyway, right?" She looked at me incredulously,

"W-why?" she asked skeptical, I smirked, "Well just figured you needed to go buy more make up, being that most of what you own is on your face right now. But you might want to take a hint and know that all the make up in the world could never cover up something as ugly as your face." Her mouth hung open and she glared, I heard Rose call from the background, I walked over to her, "OOOHHH BUUURRRNNN!" everyone was laughing and gasping, I smiled and sat down.

Rose was gigling, "That was awsome! Lauren is totally pissed with you."

I laughed, "Yeah."

I looked at Lauren, she was, actually, really pretty.

If she didn't have all that make up on, or that really low cut top, or those really short-shorts on, she would look even prettier, but still, she'd never be as pretty as Alice or Rosalie.

They are as perfect as you could get.

After Trig, Rose and I got up, "What's next on your schedule?" She asked,

I looked at it, "Um....English."

Her face lit up, "That's Jasper's!" I looked at her puzzled, "Who's Jasper?"

Rose just smiled and raised her hand and beckoned for someone to come here.

I was still looking at her confused, when two guys came running to her. I looked at them, one was tall, muscular, and blond with blue eyes, the other, was tall and very, very muscular, he had curly jet black hair. He had the most wonderful crystal, clear blue eyes that I had ever seen.

I turned to look at Rose, she was smiling, "Bella, this is Jasper Hale, my brother, and Emmett Cullen, my boyfriend. He's a grade higher than us."

I smiled, they were looking at me with puzzled features, "I'm Bella...the new kid." I said. Just then the muscular looking guy, known as Emmett, busted out laughing,

"She's got a good sense of humor!" I stared at him confused,

"Um...okay." I turned to Rose, who was laughing as well,

"That's not all, in trig. she totally burned Lauren Mallory. Tell him what happened Bella!"

Emmett looked at me expectantly, I cleared my throat, "Well, I accidentally fell on her, and she went all crazy about her top so I said she had to go shopping anyway because she needed to get more make up, then I said that all the make up in the world could never cover up her ugly face." I said. Emmett, and Jasper laughed, hard.

"Damn, I wish I could have been there." Gasped Emmett as he kept on laughing. "Jasper, Bella's next class is English, can you take her?" I looked at Jasper, he nodded.

So Jasper and I were walking, I decided to make small talk,

"So have you been in California your whole life?" Jasper smiled, "Yeah, the Cullen's too." He replied,

"Really?" I asked,

"Well, not really, but they moved here so long ago that I like to think that."

I smiled, "What's it like? Does everything get boring after a while?"

Jasper laughed, "Hardly, you'll be lucky if anything becomes the same...then again, that's pretty much Rosie's and my life."

Jasper frowned,

"Are your parents very busy?" I asked,

Jasper's frown deepened, "Rose, and I don't have any parents...they died a couple years back..."

I put my hands to my mouth, "Oh, I'm so sorry, it was none of my business."

Jasper smiled, "It's okay, I was sad at first, but Alice helped me get through it. Along with all the other Cullen's. I mean _all_ of them."

I became confused, "You mean, just Alice, and Emmett...and maybe their parents right?" Jasper stifled a laugh, "No, the whole family, as in Grandma Cullen, Grandpa Cullen Auntie Cullen, and so on. They were really helpful."

I raised my eyebrows, "Wow." I replied, Jasper smiled,

"Yeah, they helped us out a lot...we actually live with the Cullen's now...Dr. Carlisle Cullen, Alice's dad, helped Rose and I though all of the trauma. He's a doctor you know...greatest one you'll ever meet...Then theres Esme, Alice's mom. She's a very famous designer. Alice inherited a lot from her...especially her fashion sense. Esme paints a lot too. You already know Emmett." I nodded,

"Then there's Edward..." I lifted my eyebrow, "Who's Edward?" I asked,

Jasper smiled, "You are truly new here aren't you?"

I smiled sheepishly, "Well, you know Alice Cullen, she's my girlfriend by the way, and then there's her brother Emmett Cullen, my jock friend...next is Rose, my twin sister, and then there's...Edward Cullen, Alice and Emmett's brother...he's...different..."

I frowned, "Why?" I asked stupidly,

Jasper looked tense, "Well...He's the captain of the football team...and...he tends to get a lot of girls...in other words, he's a player." I froze, not again, "P-player?" Jasper looked worried, "Yeah. Are you okay?" I nodded and tried to smile, "Yes, just a bad memory." Jasper looked relieved, "Oh, you scared me there for a minute..." their was a moments silence, "So, I guess I can trust you not to fall for Edward's charm then?" I nodded still frowning.

Soon we were in English class, Jasper was about to sit down with me, but then some guys, jocks, no doubt, called for him to sit with them.

He looked at me, torn between sitting with me or them. I smiled, "Go sit with them, I can deal."

Jasper smiled and left. I found a spot next to a girl with long brown hair, it was in layers.

She was tall, thin, and had wonderful brown eyes. She smiled at me, "Hey Bella."

I gave her a puzzled look, "Um, I'm sorry, do I know you?" I asked.

She laughed, "Probably not, I'm in your trigonometry class. My name is Angela Weber. I only know you from your introduction that Mr. Varner made you give."

I laughed, "Yeah, is he always that mean?" Angela nodded, "I suggest you try to stay on his good side." I rolled my eyes,

"Wherever that is." Angela chuckled and beckoned for me to sit down. Just then Lauren came in with a skimpy looking friend, Angela followed my gaze, "Oh yeah, Lauren hates you now." I rolled my eyes, "Yeah, no kidding, I called her ugly." I glanced at Lauren who, in return, sent me a death glare.

After English, Jasper and Angela walked me out.

We stopped just beside the water fountain and they waited for me to pull out my schedule, again.

"My next class is...History." Jasper looked at Angela, Angela looked at Jasper,

"Sorry Bella, but we both have Spanish."

I chuckled, just great, "That's okay." I lied, I was getting really good at this. Just then Emmett walked by, "Hey Emmett!" Jasper called out, Emmett stopped and ran over to us, "What's up?" he asked. I looked down to the floor, the last thing I wanted was to be a burden, "Bella needs to know where the History room is and our Spanish class is the opposite way. Since you have Biology, could you show her the way?" Emmett smiled, "Of course." I sighed in relief, "Thanks." I muttered.

So now Emmett and I were walking, it was a very short and quiet walk, it was just before we went to my door did I decide to ask Emmett a question, "Um...Emmett...I was wondering if you could....if you could tell me about your brother?" Emmett froze, he slowly looked into my eyes and frowned, "Edward...is a player, who uses girls...don't fall for any of his tricks." he said. I gulped, so this Edward guy really did have a reputation. I nodded and he left in a hurry, "Bye Bella!" he added quickly, before he disappeared behind the door.

I walked into my class, "Bella! Bella!" I heard a voice yell, I turned my head to see Alice. I immeadiatly ran up to her and grabbed a seat. "Hey Alice!" I smiled, as did she.

"So how has your day been so far?" she asked, I laughed, "Well, it's been fairly good, except for that incident in trig."

Alice busted out laughing, "Rose told me about that." I laughed as well, "So, any familiar people in your classes so far?" She asked, I nodded, "Yeah, I have trig, with Rose, and Angela, I have English with Jasper and Angela, and apparently I have History with you." Alice laughed, "So, did Jasper walk you down here?" She looked behind me expectantly, then frowned, I stifled a smile, "No, Emmett did, he has Biology right next to us." Alice nodded.

After History, Alice and I caught up with Rose, Emmett, and Jasper.

They had saved us a table, "So, where's Edward?" asked Rose,

Emmett frowned, "When I went to get him, I walked in on him and a girl. I don't think he's coming."

I wrinkled my nose, players, they're all the same. I shivered, I _hate_ players...especially after..._him_. Alice saw the look on my face, "I know, it's disgusting, isn't it? The way he just uses girls." I nodded, just then I saw a god like creature come through the doors of the cafeteria.

He looked straight at our table and smiled. I looked at everyone else. They were all frowning, oh, so this must be Edward, I glared at him too.

When he sat down just across from me I thought I would die, he looked so hot.

"So how was your, _day?_" asked Emmett sarcastically,

Edward smirked, "Just as good as yours, but with a little more entertainment."

Emmett glowered at him, as did everyone else.

That's when Edward turned his attention to me, "Hey their hottie...What's your name?"

I rolled my eyes, and looked away, I couldn't stare at his perfect beautiful face, or his forest green eyes any longer.

"Bella...Bella Swan." I did a quick glance at him, he was smirking, that bastered thought I liked him, well technically I did...but he didn't need to know that! "Well miss Swan, has anyone ever told you, that you are beautiful?"

I smiled, "Yes, I do believe I've heard _that line_before...in fact, a similar _player_ said it to me...exactly like you just did." I said, I winced inwardly, I didn't like thinking about him.

Edward glared, "Well, I guess that _player_ didn't do you justice then? Being that he's not still around. Did he ever tell you that your just way to damn pretty for your own good?" I smiled again, "Even better, he told me that he loved me." I said, I heard gasps from all around are table, but I think Jasper figured it out sooner than the rest...you know, bad memories and all.

That's when I decided to take my leave,

I looked at my schedule and tried to find biology. It was very easy to find, I just went back to History, then went to the room beside it.

I was reading a book when a velvet like voice whispered in my ear. "So, he said he loved you did he?"

I gritted my teeth together, "Yes." I answered flatly, "What of it?" I asked, Edward sat beside me,

"Nothing, I was just wondering if he really meant it... you know, us players and all."

I glared at him, he glared back. So he was still ticked about lunch. I smirked, "Well, of course he didn't, he was a player...they never tell the truth." I glanced at him, but he was just looking at Lauren. I sighed disgusted, then I became angry when Lauren turned her head away and Edward started making eye contact with her friend, the one known as Jessica Stanley. I couldn't help but laugh though, they were so clueless.

That's when the teacher came in,

"Hello Class, my name is Mr. Banner, and this is Biology class. please take your seats."

I looked around the room to look for any familiar faces, none. Dammit! I looked at Edward, expecting him to get up and go try to flirt with a girl that was easy.

But he didn't, he just looked at me amused, one eyebrow arched up.

I rolled my eyes and scooted my chair as far away as I could from him.

"Today's class, is going to be a short class. We are studying the cell structure and function on the Organelles, and as you know we have a new student...Mrs. Swan, would you please stand up?"

I took a deep breath, Edward stared at me, highly amused. "Hello." I said and quickly sat down.

Mr. Banner smiled at me, "Students, please look at the person sitting next to you," I looked, well more likely, glared at Edward.

He just smiled at me, "The person you are staring at will be your partner for the rest of the year. No exceptions." I froze,

No. No. No. No. NO. NO. NO! This is not happening dammit! I thought

"Please take this time to get to know your partners, small talk is acceptable." I sighed and felt something tapping on my shoulder, "What are you doing?" I muttered, "Well he said get to know you...I'm trying to find out what makes you tick." I sighed again, "Just, shut up." I knew Edward was smiling, damn. A whole year of this shit, why does God hate me so much?!

After Biology, I realized that I had Music class...with Edward.

We walked in there and sat down, only this time I sat as far away as possible from Edward.

Soon our music teacher came in, "Settle down, settle down." he said.

He looked at the class and smiled, "Today we are going to work on are own composed pieces that we did in the beginning of the year."

My eyes shot up from the doodling, I smirked, this was going to be a snap.

Suddenly the teacher's eyes were on me, "Oh, miss Swan, since you are new here, you don't have to worry about that." I laughed, "No, no it's okay, I write my own music anyway."

All eyes were on me, though I didn't really like the awkward attention, I bragged.

Music was something I was proud of. I also noticed that they were giving me confused stares,

"I'm in a band." I explained.

My eyes snapped over to Edward's. He looked quite shocked. I glanced at the music teacher again, he looked quite shocked as well,

"Well then would you mind going first, Ms. Swan?"

I smiled, "Of course not!" I grabbed a guitar, "Is their a specific type of theme to the music that we were supposed to write?" the teacher shook his head, "Nope, I only request one song of yours."

I tuned the guitar so it was in tune with my song and began to sing,

_My hands are searching for you, my arms are outstretched towards you._

_I feel you on my finger tips, my tongue dances behind my lips for you._

_This fire rising through my being, burning, I'm not used to seeing you._

_I'm alive, I'm alive._

_I can feel you all around me, thickening the air I'm breathing._

_Holding on to what I'm feeling, savoring this heart that's healing._

_(All around me by Flyleaf)_

When I finished the song, I looked up from my guitar, everyone was quiet. "What? No applause?" I said sarcastically, though I wish I hadn't.

Now the whole room was clapping like crazy.

I blushed, as red as a cherry tomato.

I took a risk and glanced at Edward, he was just staring and smiling at at me. Then he winked, I glared at him. What a dick.

After Music class I was pulled over by my teacher, "Ms. Swan. That was a striking performance,"

I smiled, "Thank you, sir."

He smiled back, "Yes, well, there is this audition, just around the corner from school. This club that is looking for a band. I was wondering If you were interested? The reason I ask is because the owner of the club is a friend of mine."

I couldn't contain my smile, "Yes! Oh yes! We would love that, thank you ever so much!"

The Teacher smiled, "That's wonderful, now I just need for your parents to sign this slip, stating that you are under eighteen. So you can't have any alcohol."

I frowned, teh, yeah right, he must be crazy if he thought that I would ever drink one drop of that deadly stuff, especially considering my parent's history.

"Mr. Snike, My parents aren't in California, it's just me and my band..." Mr. Snike frowned,

"Well how old are your band mates?" I smiled,

"Their all nineteen, they go to college here actually." Mr. Snike's face lit up, "They do? I teach night classes at the University there...I wonder if I'll see them tonight?"

I smiled, "You should, they do at least two night classes, Their names are Victoria Shawl, James Renoles and Laurent Owens."

I beamed at the mention of their names, I loved them so much, I couldn't wait to tell them how my day went. "Hmmm, Well I'll definitely look for them, but if I don't see them I'll have to trust you get that signed. But since they are your guardians, I think I can talk my friend into making an exception." I smiled, as did he, "Just remember to get them to sign that." I nodded and made my way out the door. I was halfway to gym when I realized...Edward was here.

"So, you live alone?" he asked, his velvet like voice holding me breathless.

I jumped, "What do you want, Edward?"

Edward frowned, "I want to know whether you live alone, or not." I sighed,

"No, I don't, I have roomates...." I looked at him, he was in deep thought, but his face showed amusement,

"Three right? You live with three people?" I nodded stiffly, "What of it?" He smiled,

"One's a girl right? Vickie, or Victoria something right?"

I let my mouth drop and made a disgusted face, "Oh my God, Edward, It's bad enough that you were eavesdropping, but if you expect me to 'play cool' when you start talking about Victoria and you then you are so incrediably wrong!"

I started to walk faster....he caught up easily. "All I'm saying is...what do you think?" he said, I walked even faster than before, "I think that there is something mentally wrong with you, not only that, but she has a boyfriend...and it's James!" Edward pouted at the mention of a boyfriend, then smiled again, "So that leaves you then...your single right?" I just glared at him.

We made it to gym exceptionally fast, considering...So I wasn't surprised when we were the first ones there...just disappointed. I was hoping for at least the teacher to be here. Damn!

I glanced at Edward, but he looked different, he really looked as if he was in deep thought...about something important, all signs of humor gone.

But unfortunately, my luck ran out and he caught me staring at him. Damn! The next thing I'm staring at, is his beautiful crooked grin, and his eyes full of mischief.

"What's so funny?" I snapped as he started laughing, "Nothing, just that, no matter how hard you deny it, you totally can't take your eyes off of me."

I glared at him and turned around, "You can be such an idiot sometimes you know!...And I do NOT think your HOT!" I yelled, he just smirked, "I never said I was hot, just that you can't take your eyes off me." I froze, "Yeah, but you were implying it." I mumbled as I felt my cheeks burn.

Finally my luck changed for the better, the coach and nearly half the class walked in.

I immediately found Angela, Jasper, Alice, Emmett, and Rosalie, and a new kid. "Um...hello." I said, the guy smiled at me, "Hi! I'm Jacob Black..." I smiled,

"I'm Bella, Bella Swan." We shook hands, and smiled. I looked at everyone else and gave them a who-is-this-guy look. They just smiled and pointed to Angela, who blushed and mouthed, "My boyfriend." I was shocked, no doubt about it, then I smiled.

I glanced over to where Edward had been, but he wasn't there, I looked around the room for him, I found him snogging a girl, right in plain sight...poor girl.

After gym I had Spanish,,,with Edward, then after Spanish school was let out.

I was calling a taxi when Alice came up to me, "Hey Bella, do you have a car?" I looked down, "No, I have to call a taxi until James buys one."

Alice scrunched her eyes, "Hmmm...Well I guess I'll have to give you a ride."

I smiled, "I would like that so much!" She laughed, "Geez Bella, why didn't you just ask me?" I blushed and looked down at the ground. As soon as we pulled up to my house, I thanked Alice, and tried to sustain a laugh when her mouth fell open,

"Oh Bella, your house is beautiful." I smiled, "Well, thank you, I'll invite you over sometime...in fact, do you want to come in?" I asked expectantly,

Alice was lost for words until she glanced at the clock, "Dammit! Geez, I'm sorry Bella, I'd love to, but Rose's car is in the shop, and they all need a lift home. I'm pretty sure they wouldn't want to ride with Edward and God only knows what slut he has." I laughed, "It's all right, I'll see you tomorrow." Alice waved and drove off.

After Alice was out of sight, I went home and showered, got dressed in my new Pj's, and cooked dinner for James, Victoria, and Laurent.

Dinner took a while, I almost fell asleep when I was stirring the noodles.

I was making Feddicini Alfredo, with french bred. I was almost done. I glanced at the clock, it was six. That meant that the others would be home in about two hours.

After dinner was done, I cut everything off, made myself a plate, and watched some TV. Two hours later, as I predicted, James, Laurent, and Victoria all came home, totally beat.

"Hey Guys, I made some dinner...You can heat it up if you want." Laurent smiled at me, "Thanks." I smiled, "No problem."

After they were done eating they sat on the couch. Victoria turned the TV off and smiled, "So, how was your day?" she asked, I smiled,

"It was great, I made at least six friends today, (including Jacob). I have really nice teachers, except for Mr. Varner, he's my trig teacher, total dickhead. Any way their was this slutty bitch named Lauren Mallory, I totally burned her when she tried to start a fight! And then...then there's Edward."

At the sound of Edward's name James and Laurent tensed up a bit, I could tell they didn't like the 'boy talk' very much,

"He's the player of the school, and my friend's brother."

Victoria raised her eyebrows, "And do you like this Edward guy?" I frowned, "You of all people should know that I would never like a player...especially after what happened." I said, but the truth was they didn't understand, because I only told them part of the story, the other half is my secret alone.

"So, how's your day been?" I asked,

They all frowned, "It was so incredibly long, but it was great, and the best part was, at the end of are second night class, we were all three pulled over and asked our names by this teacher." said Laurent, I smiled, "His name is Mr. Snike, right?" I asked, they all nodded,

"And he told you guys that he wants us to audition at the club right?" I asked again, and like before, they nodded. "How did you know?" Asked James skeptically, I sustained a laugh, "Mr. Snike is my music teacher, after he heard me singing he pulled me over in class today to tell me the same thing. He said that I had to get this slip signed though...that's when I told him about you three, I said that you were my guardians for now and so he said he'll talk to you."

After I was done explaining everything I took out the pink slip. They all read it and signed. After that, we decided to watch a movie, then later go to bed.

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**Hey people's, thanks for reading again...this chapter was extra extra long. Thank you so much to the people who reviewed, I really appreciate it. Thank you Jenna009 for your help. I hope that by me spacing it out, will be easier to read. BYE!**

**Sincerely,**

**Blink182lover4life.**


	3. Secrets abound

**Summary: **Bella is just your average small town, tomboyish, stubborn yet shy, seventeen year old girl. Pretty normal, right? Well, not really, did I mention that Bella has a secret? No? Must have slipped my mind. Throw in a cheating and abusive boyfriend, alcoholic parents, and a secret that would make any person cower in a mixture of fear and pity and what do you have? A not-so-perfect life, right? Thought so. So anyway, Bella finally gets the nerve to leave her small town behind. She moves to California in hopes that she will finally have a chance at a normal life. Lesson learned.....never trust a school news flier....they tend to lie. Watch how Bella meets Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie, Alice, and, of course, Edward. (the biggest player in the school.) But will Bella tell her new friends her darkest, deepest secret? Or will she always push away the people she cares about? Will she open up to Edward? Or will Edward open up to her? Read and find out!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own, nor will I ever own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Or Breaking Dawn. They all belong to the wonderful author Stephanie Meyer. Any of the songs you see are NOT written by me, they all belong to their respectable owners. No copyright infringement intended.

**Pairings: **Eddie/Bella, Alice/Jazzy, Emmy/Rose, Carlisle/Esme, Jacob/Angela, and Victoria/James.

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_I was driving just outside of Forks Public High school, when my car broke down, _

_"Damn!" I thought as I got out, I looked at my tires, one was flat, that's weird, I just changed the tires this morning...I opened the hood to my truck, damn, I burned up the engine, it then occurred to me to check the fuelometer...empty...Well that's just odd. _

_I went to check the hood again, but I was suddenly tense. _

_As I bent over to see how my engine burned, something grabbed my ass. I whipped my head around to find...him. _

_He was grinning at me, evilly, it looked way to creepy to be a friendly grin. I backed at least two feet away from him, "What do you want?" I asked shakily, he grinned even bigger, "You know what I want." he said, I gulped, _

_"Why did you do that...just a minute ago?" I asked, _

_He chuckled darkly, "Sorry, I just couldn't help myself, you looked to damn good in those jeans." _

_He took a step forward, and I took a step backwards. _

_"Listen, I already told you, that I don't want to be your girlfriend anymore...so if you could...go away, that would be great." _

_I suddenly realized that I was whispering, and that he was right next to me. _

_"Well, it's seems that we have come to a misunderstanding...because, I just thought you needed a little time...to heal...." _

_The last thing I wanted to do was piss him off, so I tried to pretend, _

_"Oh, yeah, what was I thinking, look, I still need a little bit more time...you know,...to heal." _

_He suddenly became angry, yeah, just my luck. He slapped me, and I fell from with impact and grabbed my reddening cheek, he didn't stop either, as soon as I was on the ground he kicked me, _

_"Time, it's always time with you, you bitch, you LIAR! you fucking make me do this, I hate you!" he yelled, _

_I just tried not to scream, that would only make things worse, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!" I yelled, _

_he picked me up so that I was just mere inches away from his face, _

_"You see what you do to me, DO YOU SEE! you bitch *slap* you bitch *slap* you fucking bitch *slap* *slap* why! Why can't you love me? Do you think you're to good enough fo me? Is that it? Well, I can make you nothing but dirt you bitch! You whore! *punch to the stomach* I fucking hate you!" _

_I was crying, when he dragged me out into the woods. I started screaming for help when he quickly started to unbuckle my jeans, then my shirt-------------------_

"AHHHHGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" I yelled as tears sprang from my eyes,

Victoria busted into my room, followed shortly by James and Laurent.

It was twelve thirty in the morning, "Shhh... it's okay, it was just a dream...shhh..." soothed Victoria,

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," I cried,

though Victoria just shut me up, this wasn't the first time I had, had this dream.

I've had this same dream for the past year, only, when I would scream at my parents house, nobody would come and soothe me.

And when I would have it at Victoria's, she would always be there,

she was used to this kind of stuff by now.

Though I never told her what the dream was about, and I know she often wondered, she never asked any questions.

But sometimes I would lie to her just to relieve her from the stress of...my problem.... So I guess you know now... my most deepest darkest secret. I

Isabella Marie Swan, was viciously raped, beaten, and abused....and that wasn't even the worst part. After what I did...I suddenly felt sick just thinking about it.

After a couple minutes of crying, I assured them all that I was okay and begged them to go back to sleep.

They did, and I was glad. I didn't go back to sleep after that, so I just waited for Laurent to wake up.

As soon as I heard his alarm clock I got up, and ignored Victoria and James cussing out his alarm.

I took a shower, and waited for Laurent to hand me my breakfast.

After breakfast we all hurried to school.

School went by pretty fast, it was only at lunch did I realize that it was half over.

"Wow, you look beat." Said Alice as she sat down beside me,

"Yeah, I uh...couldn't sleep." I said.

A moment later Alice had a steaming cup of coffee in her hand, she held it out in front of me,

"Here you go." She said and watched me as I drank it, all, in like two gulps.

I didn't even care that it was scorching, it only woke me up faster.

I looked at everyone else (excluding Edward...he was...busy) they all looked at me like I had grown two heads.

"What?" I asked

and Emmett busted out laughing, "You are definitely a weird little girl, you know that Bella Swan!"

I smiled sheepishly,

"Well of course she is." Stated and velvet like voice,

I groaned inwardly...it was Edward.

"So, Bella, what happened to you? You look like hell." He said,

I frowned instantly,

"Go away Edward." snapped Alice,

Edward just raised an eyebrow,

"Believe me, I'd love to go back to making out with that blond french girl, but I had to come remind you guys about next class...the bell has already rang twice....and you know the saying, three strikes and you're out."

Edward smirked as everyone groaned and started packing up.

When I didn't move everyone looked at me,

"What?" I asked, Alice lifted an eyebrow,

"Are you gonna ditch class? Cause if your not then we need to go."

I looked around, everyone had left.

"I'm not gonna ditch class, I...just gave to use the bathroom." I said quickly.

I got up and walked out of the cafeteria.

The truth was, ever since I had that dream, I was a little shaken...what if He was still out there? Harming another innocent girl...what if he wanted revenge?

I waited for fifteen minutes inside the girls bathroom, then snuck out.

"So, who are we hiding from?" said an all to familiar voice.

I jumped, "Dammit Edward don't _do _that!" I whispered,

Edward just shrugged, "Sorry." he mumbled.

I glared, he wasn't sorry, he smirked.

"You never answered my question."

I sighed, like I was ever going to answer his questions, "You shouldn't have skipped class...now people are going to get the wrong idea."

He smirked again, "I have no problem with that."

I rolled my eyes, that's when he grabbed my hand,

I flinched,

"Will you please tell me why we are skipping?"

I thought about that, "Hmm....I guess you'll just annoy me until I do...so... I _guess_ I will."

His face lit up, it looked so adorable,

"Well?..." He asked impatiently,

I sighed, "I just wanted to catch up on some sleeping...I didn't get very much sleep last night."

He raised an eyebrow,

I glared at him,

"Don't you dare think anything perverted...it wasn't like that I...wasn't sleepy." I said lamely.

He raised the other eyebrow,

I hated how he suddenly became amused...and the way he was looking at me made me nervous...

"What!" I snapped.

He tried to hide a smile, "Is that all?"

I looked away, "Yeah...I just didn't want to go to sleep."

He chuckled, "Well, if that was the case baby, then you should have called me...I could have easily kept you awake."

I made a disgusted face,

"Just because you have slept with half the school, doesn't mean I'm about to start..."

He grinned and put his hands up defensively,

"Hey, I was just saying...it was just an invitation."

I rolled my eyes and tried to walk away, but just my luck, I tripped.

Luckily, Edward was their to catch me, "Clumsy aren't we?" he said,

I glared, "Get your hands off of my ass!"

He laughed but moved his hands to my waist. I huffed and removed myself from his arms. Hopefully he would confuse my blushing with my anger. I really hoped so.

We walked around the whole school, just talking...well more like Edward flirting and I, just yelling at him.

As he was trying for the sixteenth time I cut him off,

"Edward, don't you have anything better to do than to flirt uselessly with me?"

He stopped walking for a minute,

"Yeah, I could just skip the flirting, and you and I could hit the sheets."

I groaned.

"My God, does everything just enter through one ear and out the other?! What part of I'm not interested don't you get?!"

He made an incredulous face, "The not interested part!"

I froze, then laughed, I laughed so hard that I fell down. He didn't bother to try to help me up.

"What's so funny." He mumbled as he sat down next to me.

I looked at him, "I really must be the only girl to ever turn down your offers."

Edward pouted, "Yeah, well,....shut up."

I laughed some more, "My God, Edward, you are acting like a five year old."

Edward just turned his head the other way, all was silent for a moment, then Edward started again, "Well, if you don't want to hook up, then at least tell me why."

I sighed at him, but when I looked up I just became lost in his eyes.

I was speechless, they were beautiful, yet they held confusion...and...anger.

I shivered.

I looked away, then I looked back at him, "I...don't want to because...I don't want to end up like before."

It was then that I realized I was whispering.

I stared in his eyes again, like before they held confusion...but the anger was gone, it was replaced by worry and concern.

I wanted to smile, but I couldn't. I wouldn't let myself fall for Edward...it would just end up as before...maybe even worse.

"What happened before, Bella?" he asked,

I noted that his voice was gentler, softer, yet way more serious than I have ever heard it.

He actually sounded mature.

I gulped, "You can trust me." He said,

I half laughed at that, he said trust me, but I wouldn't, I couldn't. Not after that night. Not after what _He_ did. I couldn't trust anyone, not like that.

I looked into his eyes, I swallowed hard, "Something horrible." I whispered, as I tried to block the memories.

I couldn't and before I knew it, I was curled up in a ball, gasping for air.

"Bella? Bella! Are you okay? Do you need the nurse?" I heard Edward's frantic voice.

I felt him lift me up and run me inside the building and just before I passed out, I felt a new feeling wash over me. I couldn't really identify it...but I think it went along the lines of 'security'.

Hmph, so much for not trusting him!

I woke up a while later to a bright light.

Surrounding me were Alice, Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper, Angela, Jacob, and...where was Edward?

I sat up quickly and looked around, "Where's Edward?" I asked.

All I got were weird stares, Alice cleared her throat, "Um...Bella, are you okay?"

I looked at her, "Yes, I'm fine..."

Alice gave me an odd stare, "Bella, do you know what happened."

I looked down to the floor.

"I had a panic attack, didn't I."

Alice nodded,

I sighed.

I had these often, especially after that night. I knew what the next question was and braced myself for another lie.

"Do you know why? Did Edward try to hurt you Bella?"

I stared at her incredulous,

"Hurt me? No! He tried to...save me." I nearly yelled, how could they think that?

He was their own brother.

Though for a short second I was wondering why I had just defended Edward.

I was just so sure that he would never hurt me, I felt so safe in his arms...then again, I thought that..._he_..would never hurt me...and I was wrong.

So, was I really sure that Edward would be safe...I had only known him for two days.

I shook the mini battle out of my head and looked at Alice, she was still waiting for the first part of her question to be answered...I sighed,

"I'm sorry Alice, I'm just really stressed, the truth is I don't know why I had the panic attack, probably lack of sleep, but it wasn't because of Edward."

I added quickly.

I looked around the room, and then I came back to my first question,

"Where is Edward?"

This time Emmett spoke, "After he brought you to the nurse, he went to go tell us...I was on my way down when I saw him heading the opposite way, I asked him what was wrong, he said that he just needed sometime to think. My guess is that he was still a little shaken about the accident."

I nodded and got up out of the bed.

"And where is Edward now?" I asked, none of them looked at me, I became angry, "Fine, if you won't tell me, I'll find him myself."

I was just about to open the door when Emmett spoke up again,

"Try the baseball field...go to the west and you'll come to an old dug out, that's usually where he goes when he doesn't want to be found."

I smiled and looked back at Emmett, "Thank you."

He nodded, though I could see Rose glare at him.

I was halfway across the baseball field, and was already lost.

What the hell was Emmett thinking, giving _me _of all people directions!

I had been going west for about thirty minutes now, and I was damn sure that I was off school property.

I looked around me, it was scary, what if something happened to him...what if something happens to me...I don't like being alone...I never have, especially since what happened.

I'm always scared that he'll be there...waiting for me. I looked around one more time.

That's when I found it, the old dug out.

I slowly made my way across the field and quietly opened the old shack door.

There sat Edward, he didn't even look when I tripped.

I sat down next to him, he smirked, "Looks like Emmett gave away my hide out...no matter, I'll just find a new one." He mused, more to himself than to me.

I didn't laugh, "You...weren't their when I woke up...why?" I asked.

For some reason that aggravated me.

He just chuckled bitterly, "Did that bother you?"

I frowned deeper, "Yes, I didn't get to say thank you."

He was quiet, "Your welcome." He said sarcastically.

I sighed, "Your being a real jerk, you know that?"

It was more of a statement than a question.

He answered anyway, "So, it shouldn't matter to you."

I rolled my eyes, "Why did I even bother, it was scary enough just coming here to get you...I'm leaving." I said and got up.

I was at the door when his voice ran me cold stiff.

"You...you said that something horrible happened...just before you fainted."

I tensed, oh no!

I turned around, "What of it?" I snapped.

I didn't like talking about this, not at all.

He looked at me, his eyes sharp, watching every little move I was making.

I breathed deeply, "I want to know what happened." He said bluntly.

I laughed, but it had an edge of hysteria to it.

"W-why...It's my life not yours."

I looked away from him, the floor was suddenly very interesting.

At the moment anything was interesting, except him.

I heard him sigh but I didn't look up, "Bella, please?"

In one moment I was shaking, I thought I was going to faint again.

I slowly sat down beside the door, and wrapped my arms around myself.

For a split second I actually thought about telling him, but condemned the idea faster, it was better this way, wasn't it?

It was my burden to bare, and nobody elses...plus, if...He ever found out...then that would just make things so much worse...he'd track me down and kill me, no doubt.

He'd finish what he started. I shivered, I didn't realized that I was crying...it was then that I decided...I'd only tell him half of it.

I looked up, I saw that he had given up and was going to leave, his back was turned to me.

I heard him sigh, "Never mind Bella. I don't want to have to carry you to the nurse again." he said.

I could tell he was angry with me.

He started to walk away.

"H-he was my friend." I choked, my voice had become dry, he stopped, he kept his back turned though.

I continued, "I didn't really know him that well...u-until one day he came up to me after school. I had always liked him...and I knew his status, but I-I didn't care. That day we hung out after school, he told me he liked me..."

I stopped.

I waited for Edward to turned around, but he didn't, I just wanted to see his face...and that bothered me.

I wiped away a fallen tear.

"I believed him. The next day we pretended as though yesterday never happened...he said it was our little secret. I wanted him to keep on liking me, so I

agreed to go along with it...even though I didn't really like the idea. I saw him flirting with other girls like crazy, and even though I never told him, I hated i

t, I hated it when he would come to class late, and tell the teacher he a was sick, he never knew, but I saw right through his excuses. I saw the spots of

smudged lipstick and wanted to cry. I tried to tell myself that it was just part of the deploy, that he really liked me instead...but I just couldn't deny the

feeling he was lying. All week we secretly hung out after school. I loved it, that's when he tried to get me to sleep with him..."

I stopped again, Edward tensed slightly, he slowly turned around.

"D-did you?" he tried to act as though he didn't care, but his eyes betrayed him, he looked sad, confused, and angry.

I shook my head.

"We were in the back of his truck, and he kissed me, his hands slowly made their way to my back and then up my shirt...that's when I stopped him. I told him that I wasn't ready...and even though he looked angry he said okay."

I stopped and took a deep breath, I let a tear fall and then continued, "The next day he said he loved me...I was so happy, that's when we decided to make our relationship official.

He gave me a ring, and we announced are status publicly, I smiled as I watched all of his whores frown. I was on top of the world...and then I fell off.

That next week he had been acting strange, so I followed him, I followed him all the way to another girls house. When he went in I started to get worried and soon I just decided well, hell, curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought him back.

So I went into the house, and climbed up the stairs, I waited outside the door when I heard the girl say, 'What about your girlfriend?' and I heard him reply, 'What girlfriend?' I wanted to scream, I opened the door and yelled at him, and then ran.

He tried to apologize in school the next day...but I didn't listen, I avoided him for two weeks, every night he came to my house, begging, so one night, I gave in, we got back together...

I told my self, that he was a player, and it was his nature to cheat...so I wasn't surprised when I found him in _another_ girls pants...just heartbroken....he came to my house drunk that night, we had another fight and...he hit me. And he wouldn't stop.

After that I left him, and never took him back...he...uh...moved away the next summer...."

I looked at Edward, he just looked away,

"I'm...Sorry..." was all he said.

I nodded and tried to stop crying, but then the memories that I didn't want to see came...I yelped, and was oddly surprised when Edward was by my side.

I looked up, and cried even harder, he just held me as I cried into his shoulder.

I slowly fell asleep and woke up a couple minutes later, we were outside the old dug out, I rested my head in the crook of Edward's neck, he smelled so good...I didn't want to let go...until I realized that this was Edward, that I was talking about, and the fact that he was carrying me bridle style, didn't help.

I quickly tensed up, I heard him chuckle,

"Don't be so tense, it's just me." I blushed,

"Please put me down."

He smiled, but none the less, let me slide from his grip.

I was exhausted, and so when my feet hit the ground, so did my butt.

"Ow." I mumbled as I just sat their.

Edward roared with laughter.

I became angry and...slightly embarrassed. So I did what any mad/embarrassed girl would do.

I caught him off guard and yanked him down on his ass too.

The look on his face was priceless and after a brief second of silence, _I_ now roared with laughter.

Edward joined in shortly, "I must say your a clever little girl, aren't you?"

I just smiled and continued to laugh, I decided that it was time to get up, but stupid me fell again...only this time it wasn't so funny...because I landed on Edward.

Once I stabilized myself I noticed how close we were to each other, I wanted to get up, but I found that impossible, I was to caught up in his eyes.

I just stayed their, looking at him...he did the same,

"Clumsy again?" Asked Edward softly,

I just smiled, not breaking eye contact...his eyes were so green, and beautiful, I was speechless...again.

It was then that I noticed our heads slowly becoming closer, I could feel Edwards hot breath.

I shook my head and cleared my throat, I slowly got up and waited for him to do the same.

Edward looked away, and quickly brought himself to his feet.

Their was a very long and awkward silence.

"So." Said Edward,

I looked at him, but he wasn't looking at me.

"So, what?" I asked slowly.

Edward stayed silent for a second, "You, said a little bit earlier, that you didn't like coming out here alone...why, were you scared?"

I sighed and looked away, why was he so interested?

"Well, I just don't like being alone...especially at night...it...scares me....um, bad memories." I said.

It wasn't really a lie, so it sounded convincing enough.

Edward gave me a skeptical look, "So, what scared you the most?"

I raised an eyebrow, "Listen Sherlock, I've already had to breakdowns today, don't make me go into another."

Edward just raised both his eyebrows, I couldn't help but smile, "Aww... you do worry about me." I said, and for the first time, I saw Edward blush. I definitely committed it to memory.

I looked at my wrist watch,

"Holy Crow! School's over!" I yelled as I a started to freak out.

Edward laughed, "Yeah it's been over for two hours."

I was silent for a minute as I waited for it to sink in, I saw Edward cover his ears,

"WHAAAT?!" I yelled as loud as I could, Edward winced,

"Damn! Not so loud, you'll wake the dead!" he snapped.

I ignored him, "Oh my God, oh my God, Oh my God, What am I going to do? What am I going to say?"

I panicked and started to hyperventilate, I felt a hand on my shoulder, "Relax Swan, I don't want you to have another panic attack. You worried me enough with the first one."

I froze, "R-really?"

He looked away quickly, "Well, yeah...it's not everyday a girl just faints and doesn't breathe, or move or..." He shivered.

I couldn't help but smile, "You really were worried about me..." I mused.

He avoided eye contact with me, I suddenly remembered something.

"Which brings me back to why I was even out here on this little journey, why weren't you there then I woke up? Why'd you have to come out here?" I asked.

Edward looked over me, "I think your getting just a little ahead of yourself."

I stared at him confused, he started to walk away, I grabbed his arm, "Hey! I told you my secret...now you tell me yours. Why were you out here?" I said.

He smiled, "Is it written down somewhere, that I have to tell you everything about me?" he asked sharply.

I growled, "You haven't told me anything about you! For all I know your just a player intent on sleeping with me! It's not fair!" I snapped.

He smirked, though his face held anger, and exhaustion, "Haven't you ever heard the phrase, life's not fair?" he said, I pursed my lips, I wasn't giving up that easily, "Yes, I have actually, I've even had to learn it the hard way!"

I looked away, though I wish I hadn't, because apparently Edward had stopped and I walked into him.

"Ow, Dammit!" I yelled, only to have my mouth covered by Edward's hand.

I lifted an eyebrow, he beckoned me to look around the corner, (We had just made it back to the building) I did.

"Oh." I said as our principle came walking down the hall, I looked to Edward, "What do we do?" I whispered, he motioned for me to follow him. I complied, and quietly followed Edward out into the parking lot.

Edward looked up at me, "Do you have a car?"

I shook my head, he sighed, "Get in."

I looked at him with great surprise, he held the car door open.

I looked at the car, it was a silver Volvo.

I slowly climbed in after mumbling a thanks.

I looked at the window as Edward drove off, it was fast, no doubt. "Where do you live?" he asked, his voice was still a little rough.

Still mad, I guessed, "138 Widder Avenue....it's just down town." I said, he followed my directions and soon we were at my house.

It was then that I remembered something, "Damn!" I whispered.

"What is it?" Asked Edward alarmed, "Uh,...would you mind giving me a ride to the club just outside of here?"

Edward smirked, "You mean, the one that Mr. Snike was talking to you about?"

I smiled sheepishly, "Yeah, I was supposed to meet James, Victoria, and Laurent there after school...Which I totally didn't, which means they are totally pissed."

Edward sighed, "Sure, I'll give you a ride."

I smiled, "Thanks...I just have to get my guitar." I saw Edward roll his eyes.

I was in and out of the house in a matter of minutes.

I tried to convince myself that the reason I wanted to hurry and get back in the car was because I was two hours late...not because Edward was actually outside.

I sighed when I got back in, the car smelled just like him.

I wanted to just sit here all day, but luck was never on my side, and because Edward drives like a maniac, we were their in a matter of minutes.

Damn!

As Edward drove up toward the entrance back stage I waved goodbye.

Then I turned to stare at three very angry faces, "Um...hey guys."

I said and smiled sheepishly.

They just glared at me, I looked down ashamed, and heard Victoria sigh, "Bella, where were you today?"

She asked, I sighed, well their was no use in lying to her now, they probably already called the school anyway.

"I was with Edward."

James lifted his eyebrow, "That player kid?" I

nodded slowly, "Don't worry though, we didn't do anything, we just talked. Well, Actually I talked, he listened."

This time all three of them raised their eyebrows, "We got a call in the middle of class today, from your school, they told us that you had, had a panic attack. Is that true Bella?" Asked Laurent.

I nodded, "Yes, I was not feeling so good after lunch and I...skipped Biology class to try and catch up on some sleep...you know, because of last night."

I paused, their faces became a lot softer, "Anyway, I didn't realize that Edward was ditching too, so we just decided to ditch together. I had some unwanted memories, and then everything happened so fast. I fainted." I decided to stop there, Victoria shook her head, "Whatever, let's just get started."

I sighed in relief, "Yes, lets." I agreed.

We went on the back stage and waited for the curtains to open.

"Are you ready?"

We heard the man yelled from up stage, "This band has come from all the way from Forks, Washington...so let's show them some California love. Give it up for Isabella, and her band!"

The curtains raised, and once again I got that feeling, my heart was racing and I used the adrenaline rush to make a killer performance. "HEEEELLLLLOOOO CALIFORNIA!!!" I yelled, I put on my guitar, "This is a song that I wrote just a few years ago...called That's what you get!" The crowd screamed.

_No sir, well I don't wanna be the blame, not anymore._

_It's your turn, so take to the seat we're settling, the final score._

_And why, do we like to hurt, so much._

_That's what you get when you let your heart win, Whoa._

_That's what you get when you let your heart win, Whoa._

_I drowned out all my sense away, to the sound of it's beating._

_And that's what you get when you let your heart win, Whoa._

_(That's what you get by Paramore.)_

I looked around the crowd, and then I saw him...I almost froze and ruined the whole song, I kept my cool though, and kept on singing but I didn't take my eyes off him, and when he caught me staring he smiled, I smiled back.

I couldn't believe it, Edward Cullen had come to watch me play.

That's not all, he brought, Alice, Emmett, Rosalie, and Jasper, and Angela, and Jacob.

I smiled even bigger.

Maybe Edward wasn't so bad...just maybe.

"Thank you, please vote for us, I love you guys, and California." I said, I quickly ran off stage and took off my guitar.

"Wow, where's the fire kiddo?" Said Victoria,

"Edward and all my friends are here, they actually came to watch me play!!!" I yelled excitedly, Victoria smiled, "Oh Bella, that's great, well, what are you waiting for? Go say hi...then later introduce me." she said with a wink. I blushed.

After I walked around to the floor I looked for my friends, mainly Edward.

I was just about to give up, when I heard his voice whisper in my ear.

"So, who are you looking for?" He said, I smiled, and turned around, and for the first time...I hugged him.

He was taken aback and nearly fell, "What the hell Bella?"

I just laughed, "Thank you."

He just remained quiet and hugged me back.

"Bella, Bella!"

I heard Alice shout, Edward and I quickly let go, "Hey Alice!" I shouted, she smiled, "Bella, that was awesome!"

I blushed, I wasn't use to this kind of praise.

"Thank you." I said quietly.

Alice left shortly to go find the others, I turned to Edward, who was watching me amusingly.

"So, what brought all this on? I thought I saw the last of you when you dropped me off." I said, he just chuckled, "Well, if you want me to leave I can."

I stared at him horrified, "No, No, I didn't mean it like that!" I said panicky, he chuckled, "Relax Bella, I know what you meant...truthfully, this was just a last minute impulse kind of thing...I called Alice and told her to meet me here."

I smiled, then an idea popped into my head, "Hey, let me introduce you to my band mates." He raised his eyebrow.

We slowly made our way to the others, "Hey guys, theres someone I want you to meet." I said, all three turned to look at me and smiled, or rather, Victoria smiled, and James and Laurent just raised their eyebrows.

"James, Laurent, Victoria, this is Edward."

Victoria went up to him, "Hello Edward, I'm Victoria Shawl."

Edward shook her hand, "Edward Cullen."

Next was James, "Hey Edward, I'm James Renoles."

Edward smiled, then he shook his and Laurent's hand.

"Bella. their you are, I told you not to move!" Shouted an angry Alice, but calmed down when she realized that I was with the others, "Oh I'm sorry." She apologized, Victoria shook her head, "Don't be, Bella does that all the time."

I blushed, Edward chuckled quietly, "I'm Victoria, this is James, and that's Laurent. We're Bella's roommate's." she said.

Alice smiled, "I'm Alice Cullen, this is my brother, Emmett Cullen, his girlfriend Rosalie Hale, and her twin brother, Jasper Hale. I'm pretty sure you've already met Edward, my other brother. Then there are our other friends Angela Weber and Jacob Black...but I guess they're a little busy at the moment."

Alice winked and Victoria busted out laughing, "Yes, I bet they are. Young love. It's so sweet."

James came up to Alice, "I just want to say that you guys are welcome over anytime..." I just rolled my eyes, he really did act more like Charlie, everyday.

After the greetings, Alice and everyone decided to go home, with one last look at Edward I decided to go home to.

James, Victoria, Laurent, and I were all beat.

I was completely exhausted.

Laurent was nice enough to cook dinner while I took a shower, another reason why I love Laurent. After dinner we all went straight to bed. For the first night I dreamed about Edward.

I woke up the next morning oddly happy, in fact, I was more than happy, I was ecstatic.

I didn't even yell when Laurent's alarm clock blasted my ear drums.

Victoria and James didn't yell either, that was weird.

I merrily skipped into the kitchen and started to cook breakfast.

We had a very late, yet productive night last night.

I decided to be nice and let Laurent off the hook with breakfast this morning. It was the least I could do.

I didn't get very far though, Laurent's alarm clock blasted not a second later....for the second time.

I swear, with as loud as that thing could get, it could probably wake the dead.

Laurent came busting out of his room, full of exuberance, he was definitely a morning person....a very _scary_ morning person...

He was so funny sometimes too, I swear he could make even the most absurd people laugh, it was great that Laurent was my best friend.

"Wow, if I hadn't have woken up, I would of never have believed it. Isabella Swan, out of bed before six thirty."

I smiled wryly, "And If I hadn't have gotten up, I wouldn't have ever believed that Laurent actually woke up after six thirty-one."

He just smiled at me, he reached to take over the cooking chore but I merely shrugged the food away, "Nah uh, I'm cooking this morning, you do it enough...go take a shower or wake James and Victoria up or...something."

Laurent just stared at me dumbfounded, then laughed, "Oh Bella, your spoiling me."

He reached for the food again and thwacked his hand away and shook my head.

I watched him chuckle lightly and walk into Victoria's room, he came back out in two seconds, "Victoria's not in her room..." I immediately froze, then I blushed. I looked at Laurent, and Laurent just stared back at me, "EWWWWWWW!" We yelled simultaneously as we put the pieces together.

I shook my head and beat the eggs a little bit faster than necessary.

Laurent came in the Kitchen as well, "Move over, I have to get that mental image out of my head." He said frantically as he looked for something to do.

I handed him the bowl of eggs, "Here. I give up...I'm going to go take a shower." Laurent took them with out a word.

After the shower, which was irrelevantly quick, I noticed that Laurent still hadn't had breakfast done.

Rather than help him with breakfast, like any other respectable friend would, I simply grabbed my guitar and sat down on the sofa. I did this for his own benefit though, he looked like if I were to go try and help him...he'd scream and go insane...I guess he still had the mental picture...ugh!

I started to strum it when Victoria came out...in James' shirt.

I blushed and completely tried to focus on my song. "I'm standing on the bridge...I'm waiting in the dark....I....thought that you'd be here, by now." I sang, I had just thought of that little tune last night...and so I decided to think up some words to go to it.

Victoria sat down beside me, I tensed, it felt odd being next to her...after I just found out she did...._that_.

She seemed oblivious to the sudden tension though, "Hey Bells! Whacha' doing? Is that a new song? Sounds great! Last night was wonderful wasn't it?" she yelled excitedly, though I think the last part had a double meaning to it...

I shuddered, "Yeah..." Was all I said, it was then that I noticed the source of Victoria's happiness.

There, on her left ring finger...was a diamond ring. I squealed, "Victoria, that wasn't on your finger before!" I yelled happily, I looked to James who smiled at me, and then back to Victoria who was beaming with pride, "I know...James proposed!" James laughed, I looked at Laurent, who was just as happy as I was at our friends sudden announcement.

Later, at school I could barely listen in class.

I was too caught up in Victoria's engagement.

After James and Laurent went to take showers, Victoria filled me in on all the details of James proposal, luckily she spared my mind the mentally impairing images by skipping what happened _after_ the proposal.

Saturday we were going to go browse around the mall and look at brides maids dresses, and wedding gowns.

We weren't going to buy anything though. The wedding was in six months, I couldn't help but be thrilled.

Victoria and I started planning right away.

It was going to be a simple wedding, friends and family only.

James had asked Laurent to be the Best Man and Victoria asked me to me the Maid of Honor.

It was going to be in June and on a beach, James and Victoria had already hired a wedding planner, but he wasn't scheduled to come until later, so up until then our minds were free to wonder and plan according to our own rules.

Rosalie nudged me in my side, signaling that class was over, I packed my books up and quickly left.

"Hey, Bella, what's with you today? You seemed so out of it in class." She said as I sat down at lunch.

I smiled as I thought about this morning, "Sorry, I'm just thinking...Do you remember Victoria from last night?" I asked.

I looked around the table, everyone nodded, (Hey, Edward was here, big surprise)

"Well James proposed to her, and their getting married in June!" I squealed.

Alice and Rose joined me, "Oh Bella, that's so romantic, I wish Emmett or Jasper would do something like that."

They both said and glared at their boyfriends, they just stuttered in response, I laughed.

"So...what did she do after he proposed? Did he do it in front you and Laurent? Did she jump on him and kiss him?" asked Alice, I cleared my throat, "Um, no he did it private..." I said, I saw Edward raise both his eyebrows, I could feel my cheeks burning red.

"And?..." urged Rose.

I gulped down a lump in my throat, this kind of talk was not something I was so animated about, "And well, one thing led to another...and well....I'll give you one guess on what happened."

Rose and Alice froze, Edward busted out laughing, "Oh, that was good Bella, you should talk about _that_ more often...of course I don't know why Alice and Rose should get all flustered..."

Rose and Alice glared at Edward, both completely embarrassed, as was Emmett and Jasper.

I grasped this information quickly, "OH MY GOD!" I yelled, Alice and Rose's blushes just deepened, "Shut Up, Angela and Jake do it too!" Snapped Alice.

I blushed, "Sorry...I was just surprised."

I looked at my tray of uneaten food, Jasper and Emmett suddenly started talking animatedly about cars and decided to go to class early.

As soon as they were gone Alice spoke up, (Edward still remained...Highly amused) "So...was it romantic?" she asked, I just raised my eyebrows, "Um...I guess," I was in desperate need to change the subject and was _thisclose_ to a breakdown.

Memories came flooding back into my head, I took a deep breath.

I was NOT going to do this...I was NOT going to scare my friends again...nor was I going to think about HIM and what he did to me! I snapped my eyes too Edward, "So...Are we going to class or what?"

Alice looked at me, "Um, Bella? Class doesn't start for another ten minutes."

I rolled my eyes, "Ever heard of going early?" I snapped.

I didn't mean to be so quick with everyone...but I wasn't exactly doing 100 percent at the moment and needed some space.

"Sorry, I was just saying..." She replied.

"Don't worry she's just a little tense...she's probably mad because she doesn't have a boyfriend. Hehe." I heard a snobby voice say.

It was Lauren. Damn.

"Yeah, maybe she should go get laid!" Said another snobby voice.

It was Jessica...double damn.

This time Edward glared, "She shouldn't _do_ that!" he snapped back.

I raised my eyebrow up, "Says the guy who has made it his sole mission to sleep with me."

Edward just closed his eyes, "Not anymore."

I, along with Alice and Rose, stared at him incredulously, He just smiled, "I have my reasons." He simply stated.

Just then Lauren sat in his lap, he made no objections, for some reason that bothered me, it felt like deja vu...only this time I wasn't secretly dating the player.

I looked down to the ground and listened to Lauren and Edward's conversation.

"So Eddie-poo, what do you say about ditching next class, and going into the Janitors closet...I've got the key and who knows...maybe if your luckily, we could go there again after school's over."

Alice pretented to gag, as did Rosalie, I just growled.

Lauren traced along his chest and unbuttoned one of his buttons to his shirt, she then pecked him on the cheek and winked, "I'll be waiting." She whispered in his ear.

As soon as she was gone Edward shivered, "Whoo, I know I'm going to take her up on that offer,"

He turned his head to Alice, "Now if you'll excuse me, I am going to go do some stuff that I was born to do." He turned his head to me, I just stared motionlessly at him.

"Bella you don't mind covering for me do you?"

I wanted to bust out crying, those were the exact same words that _he_ had said to me, in that exact same tone, surly he knew how I felt about that.

"No, I don't mind." I said flatly, but it had an edge to it. And with that I got up and left, I didn't fail to realize the instant guilt and shock in his eyes on what he had just done.

I was halfway down the hall when I heard him shout my name, "Bella! Bella, wait up!" he yelled.

I just walked faster, I so so close on the brink of tears that it wasn't funny, I didn't want him to see me cry either.

I didn't realize that he had ran to catch up with me so when he took a hold of my hand I let a little bit of shock slip through my emotionless mask and shrieked.

He let go fast, I jumped a little and concealed my shock fast.

I looked into his eyes, they were full of remorse and regret, "Bella I'm so sorry, I didn't realize what I had said until I had already said it."

I kept my face impassive, sure, I heard _that _line before.

I couldn't help but waver slightly, he really did look regretful...I closed my eyes as tears threatened to fall, why was I getting so worked up?

Just then a picture of _his face _suddenly slipped into my consciousness.

I winced inwardly.

I turned around and started to walk away, "Apology accepted." I mumbled, but he caught my hand again, "No, your still mad. Why?" he asked confused.

I sighed, "B-Because...." I said, but I didn't continue I just turned around and walked away again, another memory popped in my head, I was getting angry.

This time, instead of grabbing my hand he grabbed my waist and pulled me into him, "I'm not letting you go this time, not until you tell me why." He whispered in my ear.

I wanted to cry again, but my anger overpowered me, "Because, when you said that, that line, you said it the exact same way_ He _said it! It brought back some unwanted memories, and in case you don't understand, girls who are in love and get their hearts broken tend to not like UNWANTED MEMORIES!!!" I yelled.

I broke free from his grasp and ran into Biology class.

I didn't stay, I went to the teacher and told him I wasn't feeling good.

Since he heard about the panic attack yesterday he was genuinely worried and told me to go to the nurse.

I thanked him and ran out the door, passed Edward and into the girls bathroom.

Then I curled up in a ball and cried, I wrapped my arms around my legs and pulled them in closer, as if trying to keep myself from falling apart.

I started to cry again, and then I started to muse...why was I so upset with Edward?

It couldn't have been just because he 'accidently' brought back some 'unwanted memories' (understatement of the year).

No...it was something different... I was jealous...

I wanted to yell and scream but not at him...at me.

How could I?

How could I just betray myself like that? I didn't want to like a player, oh no, I knew what happened the last time I did.

I fell in love and ended up heart broken, abused, raped, and scared half to death, and alone in the woods...then again, I doubt Edward would be like that...but _then again,_ I also doubted that _He _would never hurt me.

And I had only known Edward for a total of three days...then compare that to the three years I had known..._Him._

Was I really sure that Edward would never hurt me? I just didn't know what to do. So I cried even harder.

After an hour I was sure Biology was over and heard some people coming into the bathroom.

I quickly made myself look decent.

Lauren came in with her posse'.

She looked at me, and she looked pissed about something, then she smiled, and said the words that completely made me lose it, "Oh, so this was where you were? Hmph, you had Edward dear so worried, _You_ were all he could think about while we were in the Janitors closet...but don't worry, as soon as we progressed he quickly lost interest in you. I mean, your just a nobody right? I broken little girl who nobody cares about...And just so we get things cleared up about trig...you are nothing but a piece of SHIT!"

*Slap*

Lauren grasped her cheek and looked at me horrified.

I just smiled briskly and went out the door.

I saw Alice on my way out, she looked worried, "Hey, Bella, word got out that you weren't feeling good, are you okay now?"

I smiled at her, but it was a forced one, "Yes. I'm fine." I lied, though I didn't care, I knew she knew that I was lying, I just proved it when I went out the school doors and ran home.

Well I ran only a short ways. As soon as I was out of school sight I called a cab with my cell phone and rode the rest of the way.

When I got home I went into my room and cried. How could He? How could Edward do that?

Did he even have a heart at all?

I wanted to scream, no, even better, I wanted to scream at him.

I buried my head in my pillow and screamed had loud as I could. I hated Edward Cullen, I hated him with a passion.

Soon exhaustion over came me and I fell into an uneasy slumber. I woke up later to the sound of screaming....my screaming. It was the same nightmare.

"Bella?"

I heard. I sat their stupidly for a minute or two, I recognized that voice.

It was Edward's.

I looked at the clock, it was three thirty...School had just let out...looks like Edward skipped gym.

"Bella, please open up...I know I'm probably the last person you want to see right now, but I really want to apologize...and Mr. Varner, Mr. Banner, and Mr. Snike had me run over here to hand deliver your homework..." He said, yeah right, Edward probably volunteered just so he could talk to me.

I slowly got up and sat at the door.

Though I would never tell him, his voice was the only one I wanted to here right now.

I sighed, wiping away some of my tears and opened the door.

I regretted it though, because I immediately tried to shut the door, luckily he caught it..."Sorry." I muttered, "Instant reflex." I explained.

He just kept on looking at me, I started to become self conscious, "What!" I snapped, my voice was going hoarse, he looked down, "I'm sorry." He whispered, I rolled my eyes, "Yeah, I heard that."

I said a little bit gentler, he looked really, really remoarseful. I almost felt guilty.

Key word...almost.

"Well, apology accepted, now leave." I said, he just stared at me, then he tried to hide a smirk, "Don't you want your homework?"

I heard a_ 'humph' _escape from me, I was in no mood for his games, "Leave it on the doorstep."

He frowned.

"Bella, I would say your being rather ridiculous...if this were just about the 'unwanted memories' But something else happened...something your not telling me."

I swallowed, and looked away, I was not about to tell him that I just had a breakdown and cried for nearly two hours because I was jealous of him and Lauren...then again, if that would make him feel bad...I still can't believe that he would do that...even after he hurt me.

Then it all clicked together, I just froze, "You said you had the biology homework?"

He nodded slowly.

How could Edward have the biology homework if he didn't go?

I took a deep breath, and tried to control my anger, Lauren had lied to me, and I had believed her.

"Edward, did you go to biology class?" He nodded, "That would be the whole reason why I have _homework._"

I turned around and walked away, "GAH! I"M SO STUPID!!!!" I yelled, I went over and sat on the couch, Edward let himself in.

He looked around the room, I could tell he was surprised, but not too surprised.

I smirked.

"It's big isn't it?"

Edward just smirked back, "Yes, about as big as my dad's vacation house in Florida."

I narrowed my eyes, all the Californians here were rich.

I guess I shouldn't be surprised that Edward and his lot are too.

I just wished they told me.

"I was shocked myself when I came in here for the first time." I admitted, I looked at Edward he just smiled, then sat down, "So...do you really accept my apology?" He asked. I frowned, "Yes. But your not off the hook just yet. I'm still mad at you, even though it was kind of silly of me."

He smiled, not an arrogant crooked smile, but a real beautiful, angelic crooked smile.

I sighed, I was really going to have to stop thinking that, I couldn't fall for Edward like I did my ex.

"So what happened in Biology, and in music and in gym?" Edward frowned.

"I skipped Gym...to come here." I smirked, "I know, it was just a test."

He looked up at me, a little agitated, I smiled, "But really, what happened in class? I'm getting pretty far behind."

Edward smiled. "Well, to tell you the truth, you would have been asleep in two seconds. I mean, really, who has to take up and hour, to talk about how the cells in an onion differ,-------" But I cut Edward off, "Oh, so we're studying the mitosis thing?"

Edward looked at me suspiciously, "Yeah." He said slowly, and then looked at me as if waiting for me to explain how I knew that. I just shrugged, "I already did both these experiments at my other school." I answered honestly.

Edward rolled his eyes, but remained skeptical.

An awkward silence passed between he and I...after all, I wasn't exactly use to Edward Cullen being in my house.

But it's not as if I couldn't get used to it...

Damn. I reeeaallly need to stop that.

"So, what happened in Music?" I asked, I knew that something was wrong, I knew the moment Edward froze, and then hesitated to tell me, he slowly began. "Um...Well, I didn't exactly know how you were going to take this...with you being mad at me and all...but..." He trailed off, as if looking for the right words.

I grew impatient, "Just spit it out already!" I snapped, Edward sighed, "Fine, but you have to promise not to get mad." I scowled, I thought about this though, What if he was about to tell me that he had skipped Music to be with, Lauren...Or what if he had done something and blamed me...I took a deep breath, "Fine, I promise." I said in defeat.

If it was something horrible, I would just have to deal with it, and breakdown as soon as he left.

Edward half smiled, "Well, since you weren't there, I had no partner..." He trailed off again, as if giving me time to get a reaction set for the rest.

I just sighed in relief, so he wasn't with Lauren, for some reason, I was in a relatively happy mood now, I looked at him for the rest, he just looked at me highly amused.

I stared at him, then became confused.

He kept quiet though, now trying very hard to hide a smile, I grew even more impatient, though I wasn't really listening before, "Well? What happened, all you said...... was that...you...didn't...have a ....partner." I snapped, though the words came out very slow in the end as I grasped what he had meant.

I stared at him horrified, "You mean?..." I said.

He nodded.

I swallowed, "Y-you and me?....Partners?....as in...spending time...outside of class?"

Edward just nodded.

I sighed, I wasn't going to lose control of my emotions...not just yet...I wasn't angry, and that really bothered me to no extent. I had every reason to be. Let's see, he made me experience all the hated and locked up memories that have traumatized me, (and forever will), He insults my house, (though I'll let that one slide), he went behind my back, knowing that I was upset, convinced Mr. Snike to let him be my partner, and now is trying to hide his adorable smile while I try and not break my promise.

I just pursed my lips, I wasn't going to let him win.

Nope.

Not today, I looked at Edward impassively, "So what do we have to do?" I asked, he just raised his eyebrow, highly amused, "Well, we have to write another self composed piece...and he picked out our song theme." He replied, I noted that he winced at the theme.

"Well, what's the theme?"

He grimaced, "Um, this is the part your not going to like."

I raised an eyebrow, "Try me."

He hid a laugh, "It's a love song..."

I closed my eyes.

Edward was right, I didn't like this part, not one bit. Honestly, what could I write?

I obviously could write about...Him, but that would be to painful, it wouldn't be about true love...oh no, it would probably start out that way, but then end in a way where a psycho who is obsessed with me, ends up abusing, then raping me.

Not really how true love would sound.

So other than a week of happy memories, I didn't know anything about love.

I looked at Edward, apparently he was still waiting for me to scream bloody murder.

I smirked, "You really think I'd freak out over that?" I asked, he just made a face, "I thought about it...doesn't it irk you though?"

I sighed, "Yes. It does, but I'm not going to let it get to me. I did make a promise." I said honestly.

He smiled, rolled his eyes, and then shook his head.

"Sometimes Bella Swan, you just don't know how amusing you are."

I raised my eyebrow again, "What's that s'pose to mean?"

He just laughed, "Nothing offensive."

I sighed, "I don't get you Edward Cullen."

Edward just rolled his eyes.

It was then that I had a bright idea, "Hey, did you bring your car?" I asked, a little too excitingly, he raised one eyebrow.

"Yeah."

I looked to the ground, "Um, you wouldn't mind driving me to the store would you?"

I looked up, he was confused, yet curious.

"Um. Sure."

I sighed in relief, "Thanks." I muttered as I went to grab some money.

But a well/gorgeous tanned hand simply stopped me.

I looked at Edward, confused now, "Please, let me pay for whatever it is you need, it's the least I can do...after today."

I stared at him incredulously, "I already accepted your apology, no worries. I've got this, I can pay for it." I replied.

"No, please? It would...ease the guilt." he said slowly.

I just stared at him, did I really make him feel that guilty.....I pursed my lips, "Are you sure you want to do this?" I said, he nodded.

I cringed, "Well, if it makes you feel better, I won't get much, I promise."

He just held a hand in front of my face, "No, you get whatever it is that you need."

I rolled my eyes, then followed him to the car.

It was silent, and yes, Edward still drove like a maniac...but really, what could I do?

"Slow down!" I yelled as he just barely missed a stop sign.

I guess he could hear the edge of hysteria in my voice, thank god!

"You girls are all the same, slow down! Slow down!" he said in a mocking girl's voice.

I rolled my eyes.

Another comfortable silence fell upon us, until Edward ruined it.

"Bella, can I ask you something?" He asked, a little hesitantly.

I scrunched my eyebrows together, "Sure." I said slowly.

"Will you promise not to get mad?" he asked.

I looked at my skeptically, "That depends."

He sighed, "Figures."

I rolled my eyes.

"W-when I came over, I...heard you screaming."

I instantly felt all the color draining from my face.

I gulped, I didn't look at him, as he continued, "You were yelling stuff too." He said, I kept my face impassive.

"What was I saying exactly?"

He took a deep breath, "You said, stop...Your hurting me, get off..."

I let out a shaky breath before I answered, "Just a nightmare, that's all."

Edward didn't look reassured.

I decided to change the subject, "So, do you know exactly what your buying for me?" I asked, he raised his eyebrows, I knew, that he knew, that I was trying to change the subject, and I was grateful when he went along with it.

"No, do you mind telling?" I smiled, "Well, I was thinking...my bedroom could use a splash of color, it's so white in there, I feel like I'm in an asylum. Just waiting for the people in white to come and have me commited."

He laughed, it sounded so angelic, I just wanted to melt.

I looked away quickly, I could feel the blush coming along.

"So, is room paint the only thing I'm getting?" I smirked, silently thanking him for breaking the awkward silence that was soon to be upon us again.

"Maybe...to tell you the truth, this is my very first room that I've ever decorated."

He looked at me incredulous, I just shrugged, "I had a lot of money troubles back home...very...unprofitable parents."

He was about to say something about that, I could tell, "Just drop it Edward, I don't want to talk about it." He raised his eyebrow, but let whatever he was going to say go.

He took me to a mall just outside of the little town.

"Wow." I said, and oogled at the mall for about thirty seconds before Edward started dragging me by my hand.

"So what do we do?"

Edward chuckled, "I'm going to do nothing but pay for this stuff, but Alice would kill me if I didn't invite her...she's great at this kind of thing. You don't mind do you?"

I shook my head, "No, of course not." I said, but the truth was I really did mind.

I was kind of looking forward to the alone time I would have had with Edward.

But I guess I would have to make things better with Alice. I left so abruptly today that I didn't even care whether I hurt her feelings or not.

I saw Edward cringed as I heard a scream, he quickly pulled the phone away from his ear, "My God Alice, don't scream so fucking loud!" I laughed, Edward just glared at me, I didn't care, at least I wasn't the one with ringing in their ears. Ha ha.

Edward and I waited for Alice.

Though we didn't have to wait long.

Because Alice drives like a manic too, she made it here in record time.

I looked up just in time to see a yellow Porsche pull up beside us. Before I could even have a chance to say 'Hi' She was hugging me, "Oh Bella! I'm so glad you invited me! Thank you, Thank you, Thank you! You won't regret this!!!!" She yelled, Edward cringed, as did I.

Alice's soprano voice sent ringing in my ears. "Alice----Can't Breathe!" I choked out.

Alice dropped me immediately, I looked to the other side of Alice to find Rosalie. I smiled, at least she wasn't going to maul me to death.

So we went into the mall, and out of kindness, I let Alice and Rose drag me into every store they could think of.

We had been walking around the mall for two hours, and I was getting hungry, "Um, guys..shouldn't we get something to eat...before we go to another mall?" I asked, Edward chuckled, I just received blank stares from Alice and Rose.

I shrank a little, "Um, okay...never mind...shopping first, eating later."

Edward laughed, and I glared at him, then looked back at Alice and Rose.

They were still staring...but not at me anymore...I turned my head and caught their line of sight.

Less than ten feet away from me, was Jessica Stanley, Lauren Mallory, Katie Marshall, and their slutty man whore jocks...hookups no doubt, their names I had only come to recognize by Gym.

Tyler Crowley was standing behind Jessica, hands all over her ass, then behind Katie their was a little guy, very buff and muscular looking though, I think his name was Austin Marks.

He was snogging her, in plain jane sight.

I wanted to puke.

Then I finally stared at Lauren, wondering who would be behind her, but their was no one, it was then that I noticed her staring at Edward.

I looked at Edward, who seemed to be completely oblivious to her.

Instead he was looking straight at me, all signs of humor gone.

Apparently he noticed my distress towards Lauren.

I smiled inwardly, the thought of Edward not looking back at Lauren made me happy...but the thought that Lauren stared at Edward made my blood run hot with anger.

I stared back at Edward, he looked worried now, "Perhaps you should eat. Your looking a little pale."

I felt very faint at the moment, and food sounded really good, I nodded.

I took one last look at Lauren, who was now glaring at me, I smiled at her.

Then I tripped.

Figures.

The bad luck always kicks in when I'm having a good time.

I waited for the impact of the ground, nothing happened, I kept my eyes closed, it was suddenly so hard to open them now.

"Bella!" The Velvety voice yelled.

I snapped my eyes open. It was then that I realized Edward had caught me, I was in his arms, facing toward him.

I heard him sigh in relief, "Thank God," He murmured, I just stared at his face, completely lost for words, "That does it, we are definitely getting some food into you." He mumbled as he reluctantly let go.

I nodded still unable to speak.

As we were walking away, he put his hand on the small of my back, I leaned into him, silently thanking him for the support.

I looked behind me, Alice and Rose also had concerned faces.

Edward had taken us all to McDonald's, then when I finally convinced them I was fine, we decided to go home.

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**So what did you guys thin of the chapter? I know it's pretty long...it was killer on meh' fingers. Sorry I didn't update sooner but I had a serious case of writer's block...and was torn between ending the chapter as a cliffy...the next chapter probably won't be as long...unless you guys like the longer chapters, then yeah...Anyway, please Review!!! I should hopefully update soon...maybe Thursday or Friday...Thanks again for reading!**

**Sincerely,**

**Blink182lover4life.**


	4. Suddenly Aware

**Summary:** Bella is just your average small town, tomboyish, stubborn yet shy, seventeen year old girl. Pretty normal, right? Well, not really, did I mention that Bella has a secret? No? Must have slipped my mind. Throw in a cheating and abusive boyfriend, alcoholic parents, and a secret that would make any person cower in a mixture of fear and pity and what do you have? A not-so-perfect life, right? Thought so. So anyway, Bella finally gets the nerve to leave her small town behind. She moves to California in hopes that she will finally have a chance at a normal life. Lesson learned.....never trust a school news flier....they tend to lie. Watch how Bella meets Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie, Alice, and, of course, Edward. (the biggest player in the school.) But will Bella tell her new friends her darkest, deepest secret? Or will she always push away the people she cares about? Will she open up to Edward? Or will Edward open up to her? Read and find out!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own, nor will I ever own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Or Breaking Dawn. They all belong to the wonderful author Stephanie Meyer. Any of the songs you see are NOT written by me, they all belong to their respectable owners. No copyright infringement intended.

**Pairings:** Eddie/Bella, Alice/Jazzy, Emmy/Rose, Carlisle/Esme, Jacob/Angela, and Victoria/James.

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Alice and Edward helped me carry all of my room supplies into my room, "I see what you mean about the mental home." Mumbled Edward.

I nudged him in the side, he winced. I laughed.

Alice looked around my room examining it, as was Rose. Edward and I were on the balcony just outside my room. Alice turned to me, "Okay Bella, explain to me how you want your room?" She said in a business like voice.

I raised an eyebrow, "I don't care, I just want color, do whatever you want."

Alice beamed, apparently that's what she was hoping for because she then became the Alice we all know and love.

"Oh Bella, this is going to be great, I promise, you'll love it!"

I smiled, then Alice and Rose made Edward open the paint leads, and then called Emmett and Jasper to come help Edward move my furniture. I just stood their, not knowing what to do, "Bella," Came Emmett's voice, Rose was laughing and hanging by his waist.

"Bella, Alice needs your help with the painting, C'mon!" He said excitingly. I chuckled.

So there we were, all painting. I decided to go with a baby blue color, for my walls, I kept my white comforter for my bed, and decided to paint my desk, and nightstand white.

After all this was California, so why not make it feel beachy?

After the painting was done, we all decided to call it a day and watch t.v. "Do you guys want to stay for dinner?" I asked, I received nods and grumbles of 'Yeps' and 'uh huh's'

Emmett and Rose were cuddled up on the couch, her head resting on Emmett's shoulder, I smiled, Alice and Jasper were sitting on the love seat, Alice was curled up around Jasper, and Jasper had his hands around her protectively.

Then their was Edward, my eyes lingered on him the longest.

I tried not to stare, but I just couldn't look away, he was sitting on the end of couch watching tv. He looked so funny, bored stiff, if I do say so my self, I chuckled lowly.

In fact, all the guys looked bored out of their minds.

They all insisted on watching a movie, and Alice and Rose picked out this really sappy romance one and because they have their boyfriends wrapped around their fingers, Emmet and Jasper grudgingly gave up and poor Edward didn't stand a chance.

I decided to make spaghetti, after the noodles were boiling I quickly made the sauce and the meatballs. That's when the phone rang, I answered it.

"Bella?"

It was Victoria, I smiled, "Hey, Victoria." I was happy to hear her, and glanced at the clock, it was nine. They should have been home by now is everything alright? Why aren't you home yet?" I asked, suddenly concerned.

Victoria groaned, "You would not believe the day we've had, I don't think we're going to be home anytime soon Bella, I think we might just stay here for the night...Are you okay with that?"

I thought about this for a second, NO, I was NOT going to be alright...but I certainly wasn't going to be a bother to them and un-intentionally force them home.

"Yes, I'm alright." I could vividly imagine the skeptical look on Victoria's face, "Are you sure? I know how you hate to be alone Bella, I don't like it either."

I sighed, "Victoria, I'm fine...you shouldn't worry okay? I promise, no more nightmares." As soon as I said that Edward looked at me, he masked the same worried features I'm sure Victoria was giving me on the other line.

I groaned inwardly and mouthed 'I'm fine' to Edward.

"Well, okay...but I promise that this will never happen again Bella, I'll talk with the teachers, so you never have to spend----"

"Goodnight Victoria." I snapped and hung up.

I didn't want to think about what Victoria looked like right now, she was probably startled, I knew she was pissed, and I also knew I would get totally chewed out tomorrow but I also didn't want to think about the nightmares. I knew I would have them again tonight, and probably wake up screaming. Though this time, nobody would come, nobody would be here.

I suddenly felt very small in this big house, this would be my first night alone...I looked around, this house had been so full of love that without James, Victoria, and Laurent, this place seemed kind of scary.

"Bella?" I quickly looked at my caller. It was Edward, he was sitting at the bar, his head in his hands, looking up at me.

"What?" I didn't bother masking up my fear and so wasn't surprised when my voice sounded shaky.

I was still imagining the scary house without my friends. Edward looked into my eyes, "Are you alright?" I snapped out of my thoughts "Um...yeah I guess so...why wouldn't I be?" I asked, Edward sighed, "I don't know, you just seem....scared, that's all." I nodded, "Well, dinner's ready." I said and gave him a plate. The rest soon followed.

We were now all eating peacefully....with the exception of Emmett...

"Bella this is awesome!" He roared, he was already on his third helping, while we were still on our first.

The rest of them nodded in agreement, I smiled, "Thanks." I looked at the clock, I guess I was still wishing that the others were home too.

"Hey, wasn't your band mates supposed to be home hours ago?" Asked Alice, I sighed, "Yes, they were. But something came up...studying I suppose and they can't make it home tonight."

Alice pursed her lips, "Well, not to be pushy or anything...but would you mind if we stay?"

I looked up at her shocked, I was about to say yes...but the thought of them hearing me scream rang through my brain.

"Um...that probably wouldn't be such a good idea...not tonight."

Alice's face fell, "When we get enough guest rooms you can." I said quickly, she cheered up, "Oh, if it's about that, then Jasper and I will sleep in the floor."

Damn! She was suppose to say, 'That's okay, I understand.'

I sighed, I couldn't tell Alice no...but I couldn't say yes. Then again...I could just pass the night as a one time nightmare deal... but that wouldn't fool Edward.....I could get us to watch a scary movie...then I could say the nightmare was from the movie.

I smiled, "Well, if you really don't mind. Okay."

Alice leaped two feet from her chair, "SLUMBER PARTY!" She screamed, the rest of us cringed.

"Sorry." She mumbled and finished her dinner.

I shot a glance at Edward, he had one eyebrow raised and looked at me skeptically. It would be hard to fool him, but I could do it.

After we were all finished eating, I mentioned the scary movie, "Yeah Alright!" yelled Emmett.

I smiled, the rest seemed to be in unanimous agreement as well, "Great, so I'll let you guys decide on the movie, and I'll go pop the popcorn, and get the blankets and dim the lights."

After everything had been done I walked over to the others......they were still deciding.

"No, let's watch 28 days!" snapped Rosalie.

Emmett chuckled, "I say we watch the Exorcist."

"_Hell_ no!" Snapped Rose, "We will watch 28 days."

Edward shook his head, "We. Are. Watching. Resident. Evil. End. Of. Conversation."

"I am still up for personal hell...or The Messengers." Cut in Jasper.

Everyone looked at Alice, "What Lies beneath." She said sternly, Jasper agreed with her. Sadly no one else did. then they all looked up, seeking me for advice.

"Um...watch them all?" I said, everyone seemed to agree, I sighed. I gave one blanket to Alice and Jasper, one to Emmett and Rosalie, and then....there was one left. I smiled and gave it to Edward, who was on the floor.

"Here, I'm not cold." I said, he rolled his eyes and wrapped up, "Thanks." he muttered as I sat down next to him, I just rolled my eyes.

The movie started, we were watching What lies beneath first. Next was 28 days, then Resident Evil, then the Messengers, then the Exorcist, (everyone shivered at that.) then Personal Hell. It was going to be a **LONG** night.

I made it all the way to the end of Resident Evil before I fell asleep, I woke up later to the sound of rustling, "Hey, what movie are we on?" I asked.

I heard Emmett chuckle, "At the end of the last movie." I looked at the clock, it was three o' clock, I sighed, I'd only been asleep for two hours.

I saw that Emmett and Rose and Jasper and Alice were all snuggled next to one another, they looked uncomfortable, I looked at Edward he seemed just fine.

"If you guys want to go into Laurent's, Victoria, and James' rooms you can." I said. "Just promise me that you won't..._do_ anything in the beds." I thought about that for a moment...back to this morning, "Then again, you might just want to skip James' room...considering what happened this morning...." I admitted, turning slightly red.

Alice laughed nervously, "Ok...thanks for the offer...Jasper and I promise...no funny business" And then she took Jasper's hand, I pointed to Victoria's room, then she led him into it. Next was Rose and Emmett, I pointed to Laurent's bedroom, they took off next.

That just left me and Edward. I glanced at him, he was looking at me so I looked away.

"So...do you want the couch or the floor?" I asked still not looking. I could feel Edward's eyes on me, 'I'm fine where I am." He said, I half smiled, "Okay."

So I slept on the couch that night, while Edward slept on the floor. Of course, I let him have the blanket...I wasn't cold, I would just wake up in sweat anyway and as I predicted I woke up nearly three hours later.

I some how managed to muffle my screams and only wake up panting heavily...still covered in sweat. I was trembling, too scared to look anywhere but straight ahead.

I felt something hot slide down my cheek and wiped it away quickly, I was crying. I closed my eyes and tried to calm myself down, it was then that I heard breathing. I looked down from the couch and found Edward asleep facing me.

I wanted to smile, but I was too scared, I looked around one more time before I let my eyes rest on Edward's sleeping form. His slow, even breaths were somehow very soothing.

I laid my head back down on the sofa, I was tired, dog tired, but I couldn't go back to sleep. As much as I wanted to, I couldn't. I looked at the clock, it was six fifteen. I sighed, the others probably won't wake up until later. So I decided to take a shower.

I stayed in the shower and just tried to get the nightmare out of my head.

The dream was different this time, instead of my car breaking down and then me getting raped, it started out on a happier note. The day before everything went wrong. It was the day He told me he loved me, then of course the dream turned into the same day and became the same dream...only this time someone was there, to save me.

I couldn't see who it was, and, of course, this was after the rape...but the voice sounded familiar...like Edward's.

I froze...why would I dream about Edward being there?

Then I remembered the last bit of my dream before I woke up,_ I was in the woods, and Edward had found me, I was crying and screaming...he just held me close to him and whispered soothing things in my ear...I was almost calm when I realized that Edward had winced, I moved away from him and found that Edward had been stabbed, he was turning pale and cold. _

_Suddenly I could see the blood, all over my hands and on Edward as well. _

_I heard laughing...His laughing, I turned around and saw Him standing there smiling maniacally at me, "Looks like we can finish where we left off after all Baby." _

I snapped out of my nightmarish thoughts. I didn't want to think about this anymore so I washed and shut off the water.

Then I wrapped myself in a towel and brushed my teeth, combed my hair. As I opened the door I bumped into a surprise.

"Edward?!" I whispered, he just smiled and looked at me...or, I should rather say, my body. I caught on quickly and hit him in the shoulder.

"Stop that!" I whispered harshly, he just chuckled, "Sorry, I couldn't resist..._Damn_ you look hot."

I raised one eyebrow, "I'm in a towel for Pete's sake! What happened to the whole 'I'm not going to try and sleep with you' idea...hmm?" I snapped, this time he laughed, but kept it low, "Sorry, guess I still had one line in me...but if you want...we don't have to tell anybody...I mean----"

I just smacked his arm and stalked away.

_Humph! The nerve of that, that, that _PLAYER!_He said that he was done making his stupid offers!!! Well, with me at least. Oooohhh if James had been here Edward would have been ripped to pieces! I would have loved that!_ I thought harshly, though for some reason I actually kind of liked being hit on...and that just made me angrier.

_I hate him! I hate him! I hate him! I hate him! _I kept chanting all in my head, but yet I still couldn't escape the giddy feeling I felt...well actually it was sort of mixed in with my anger.

After I got dressed I stomped out of my room, it smelled like paint, if we all skipped school today (which I'm sure we would) then I was going to make everyone help me put my furniture back in my room.

_I hate him! I hate him! I hate him! I. Hate. Him._ I kept chanting, "Ugh!" I looked up to see who I bumped into, _Holy Crow! I just bumped into him!!! And he is wearing nothing but a towel._ I thought, I tried to move but my feet wouldn't allow it, I looked at him, then at his chest, it was so perfect...so, so perfect.

It was muscled in all the right places. I snapped back into my senses, just in time to stop myself from drooling.

I looked back at Edward's face, he looked amused, "The offer still stands, my dear." he said in a seductive velvety voice, I glared and with all my strength and walked away. I waited for him to get some clothes on and for him to come and join me on the couch, where I now sat.

He did that in a matter of minutes, and before I knew it, he was sitting right beside me.

I caught a whiff of his scent, it smelled so good, I could breathe it all day. I shook my head of those unnecessary thoughts and glared at him.

"What are you doing up?" I asked, he looked at me, "I could ask you the same thing." He replied, I raised an eyebrow, "Yeah, but I asked you first...and this is my house." I shot back, it was his turn to raise an eyebrow, "Oh, so we're playing the house game are we?"

I smiled slyly and nodded, he sighed, "I woke up when I heard you get up. I waited for you to some back, but when you didn't I went to go make sure you were okay, that's when you bumped into me." He confessed. I knotted my eyebrows together, so he must have felt me get up...but he must have been subconciously awake for him to feel that, in fact I barely touched his shirt.

If that's the case...did he also hear me crying?

My worst fears were soon confirmed, "I...also heard you after your little episode of panicking." I didn't have time to hide my pain, and my fear.

"Wh-what did you hear exactly?" I asked slowly, he looked down to the floor, all signs of humor gone, "You were...talking, you said the same line as earlier...but then something happened and you started crying, you...also shouted my name."

I looked at him in horror, "What did I say?" I whispered in a panicked voice, I hoped it was nothing that would give my secret away...this was MY burden to bare and nobody elses.

Edward looked away, "You....you said 'Edward don't...don't die, don't leave me, he's going to kill me...he's...going to kill me...he's going to _do it _again.'" Edward broke off into a whisper, and I stayed silent with fear and horror.

I started to tremble, and I tried not to cry, just thinking about that nightmare gives me the creeps, I took deep breaths and tried to steady myself.

"Bella?" Asked Edward concerned, I felt his hands on my shoulders, I looked into his eyes with my own, only everything was blurry, I felt hot tears roll down my face, "I'm so scared." I whispered and I wrapped my arms around him and hid my face in his neck.

He held me, tight, "What Bella, What are you so scared of? What happened?"

I just cried, Edward suddenly froze, I felt my breath get hitched in my throat, and looked at him, "A couple days ago, just before your panic attack, " Said Edward, he shivered, "You told me didn't get enough sleep...is this why?" he asked.

I closed my eyes and sighed, "Yes." I whispered, Edward took a shaky breath, "How long have you been having these nightmares?" he asked, "A while...But, you have to promise me that you won't say anything to Alice and the others."

I heard him sigh and rested my head on his shoulder, then back on his neck. "Who knows about this other than me?" He asked, "Victoria, James, and Laurent are the only ones besides you."

"What do you dream Bella?" He asked, I stiffened, I couldn't tell him, "Bella, please?" asked Edward, I moved my head to look in his eyes, I gave him an apologetic look and shook my head.

Edward finally gave up on trying to find out, I felt guilty, I wanted to tell him so badly, I wanted him to know the truth, but I was too scared, if _He_ ever came looking for me, not only would I be in danger, but everyone else that knows my secret would be too.

I tightened my grip on Edward as he started to move away, "Bella, it's okay. It was just a nightmare." he whispered, I took a deep breath and looked away, then I took a moment and pulled myself together, "Thank you...what's this like the fifth time you've seen me like this?" I said as I gestured to my messy hair and puffy red eyes.

He half smiled and put his hand on my cheek, "I don't mind." He murmured, I noticed that are heads were coming closer again, I didn't pull away this time, I didn't want to, I was giving up, it was Edward who snapped his head the other way.

Looking just as disappointed and stressed out as I felt, "This isn't right." He mumbled.

I nodded and in a desperate attempted to change the subject, looked towards the Kitchen, "Do you want any breakfast?" I asked, he didn't look at me.

"Sure, thanks."

I nodded and got up walked towards the kitchen. I made the usual, eggs, bacon, toast, and sausage (for Emmett). I poured us each a glass of coffee, and Edward and I ate in silence, I made sure not to look at him, and I was sure he tried to do the same. Occasionally their were some glances when are eyes met each others, but we'd just look away quickly.

It was then that Emmett, Alice, Rose, and Jasper all busted out of their rooms, "I smell food!" Shouted Emmett, he quickly eyed the breakfast and zoomed to get him a plate.

I smiled, "Hey guys, how was your night?"

Alice smiled, "Oh it was great, thanks a lot for letting us stay." I chuckled, "No biggie."

"So how was your night? Any nightmares? I had some...but luckily Jasper was there, everything is fine when he's with me."

I froze and locked eyes with Edward, I looked away, and forced a polite smile, "It was great Alice...I'm glad Jasper kept you safe."

I didn't answer the third question, figuring Alice was to tired to even be aware of it, "Well, did you have any nightmares or not?" asked Emmett, I froze again, dammit!

I looked at Edward again too, he was slightly concerned, he looked ready to jump up and comfort me if I needed him too, I took a deep breath, Edward cut my gaze off and glared at Emmett, "Yes I did actually..." I said honestly, "But it's all okay now."

I glanced back at Edward only see that he was staring towards his food. "So are we skipping school today or what?" Asked Emmett, I chuckled forcefully, "Yeah I guess we are."

That day Emmet, Edward, Rose Alice, Jasper and I all moved my furniture back into my room. We hung posters of my favorite bands up. Some of which were Linkin Park, Good Charlotte, and Blink 182.

Then we framed pictures and put them on my desk, of course one of those pictures was with Alice, Rose and me, then a group one of us all together.

Next, we decided to have lunch, instead of cooking I ordered pizzas. I made sure to get enough, (3 boxes for Jasper, Alice, Rose, Edward, Emmett and I, and 2 extra boxes for Emmett.)

After lunch The others all fell back into the other room, I decided to excuse myself from the group, I was feeling a little depressed at the moment and didn't want to bring down their moods.

I decided to start to work on the music assignment, I was glad James had bought a Piano and put it in a secret room. I grabbed my guitar, and started strumming...before I knew I started singing how I felt at the moment.

_Well I couldn't tell you, why she felt that way._

_She felt it everyday, and I couldn't help her._

_I just watched her make the same mistakes again._

_What's wrong, what's wrong now, _

_Too many, too many problems,_

_Don't know where she belongs._

_Where she Belongs._

_She wants to go home, but nobody's home._

_That's where she lies, broken inside._

_With no place to go, no place to go. _

_To dry her eyes, broken inside._

_Well, open your eyes, and look inside, _

_Find the reason why, you've been rejected_

_And now you can't find, what you left behind._

_Be strong, be strong now,_

_To many, to many problems,,_

_Don't know where she belongs._

_Where she belongs._

_She wants to go home, but nobody's home._

_That's where she lies, broken inside._

_With no place to go, no place to go._

_To dry her eyes, broken inside._

_And her feelings she hides, her dreams she can't find._

_She's losing her mind, and she's falling behind._

_And she can't find her place, she's losing her faith._

_She's falling from grace, she's all over the place. Yeah._

_Oh, Oh, oh._

_She wants to go home, but nobody's home._

_That's where she lies, broken inside._

_With no place to go, no place to go._

_To dry her eyes broken inside._

_She's lost inside, lost inside, oh, oh, yeah._

_She's lost inside, lost inside, Oh, oh, yeah._

When I was finished I heard clapping, it made me jump. I turned around to find that it was Edward. I hadn't talked to him since this morning, but he really hasn't talked to me either.

I faintly wondered why he was down here.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, he shrugged, "I don't know, I followed you."

I glared, he looked at me feigning innocence, "What? You said you had a music project do...and we _are_ partners, so I figured...you know, why not?" he explained.

I just shook my head, "Whatever." I said and rolled my eyes. I saw him looking at my piano, "Do you play?" I asked, Edward smiled, "Used to...Quit about a year ago, right after the acci-----never mind." He said abruptly.

I raised an eyebrow but none the less kept the questions to myself. If it was his burden to bare then so be it, I wasn't going to make him tell me anything he didn't want to, I only wish he would do the same for me.

"So could you play for me a little?" I asked, after all, he'd already seen me play, and I was slightly curious as to how experienced he was.

He smiled, "Sure."

I followed him over to the Piano. He started to play and I watched as his hands gently glided over the keys...he was playing a familiar tune...

"Clair De Lune right?" I said, I had heard that song a dozen times, it was what got me started on the piano.

He nodded, then he started to play a different tune, one I'd never heard of. "What's the name of that tune your playing?" I asked, he smiled again, "It's my mother's favorite...my own composed lullaby."

I stared at him, he was really good, hardly even looking at the keys. I smiled, "It's really good, you know." He chuckled, "I get that a lot. But thanks." I rolled my eyes, after he was done we decided to get right to business, we'd already decided on our stations, Edward would play the piano, and I would sing the lyrics.

The only trouble we were having, was trying to find the lyrics and the tune to make it a 'Love song' Ugh! I cringe at the very thought. So I was laying on the couch while Edward was trying numerous tunes, I sighed, "Let's just give up...theres no way we can right about love."

Edward frowned, "Well, you can." he said, I glared and through my shoe at him, "No unwanted memories...remember?" I snapped through gritted teeth, I heard him sigh, "Well we have to think of something.... It's due the end of December and is half our grade in Music."

I frowned, "Great, how the _hell_am I going to pull this off? I've never experienced it before...not true love at least." I looked at Edward "Do you know?" He raised an eyebrow, "Your seriously going to except advice from a_ Player_ on how to love a girl?"

I pursed my lips, he had a good point, damn, "Well, what if you don't write a song about _falling _in love... Or...maybe I can get inspired or something...tell me, what's the closest thing you've ever felt to love?" I asked, I thought I saw Edward tensed but it wasn't that much so I didn't really pay attention. "Well, um....my first hook up...maybe?" I sat up, "Really? Would...Would you mind telling me about it?"

Edward busted out laughing, "You really think I'd remember that?" he asked, I looked away, "Well, do you?" I asked,

Edward sighed, "No.... I was only joking..." he said, I raised my eyebrow, "Your second time?" He squinted his eyes to try and remember, "Nope."

I raised the other eyebrow, "Your third time?" I asked, he smiled at that, "It was in my first car." I now stared at him incredulously, I raised my hands up, "Okay...really shouldn't have asked you...about that...now I'm going to have to scramble my mind just to get those images out."

He chuckled, "You brought this upon yourself." I glared, but he was right. I sighed again, "Well, that blows that song out of the water...."

"Well, actually it wouldn't be so hard to write." He said, "Oh really? That's laughable." I replied, "I won't be surprised if this song turns out to be a joke!"

Edward rolled his eyes, "You shouldn't be so negative about this...We can get inspired...probably by watching other people. Like Alice and Jasper...or something like that..." I rolled my eyes, "Now we're just desperate...if we're gonna have to watch them make out all day then I'd rather pass."

I could see that Edward was getting agitated at my constant negative energy...But I wasn't exactly in the best of moods either.

"Well then whadd'ya say we just fail? Hm? I'm sure a pretty little F will look really good this here...what do you think? I say that the least we can do is try!" He snapped.

I sighed, "It's no use...I'm not good at writing love songs...and you probably aren't either..." Edward stood up, "We can at least try. Just think about how you used to feel about him before--"

"Before what? Before he broke my heart? Oh yeah, I'm sure a weeks worth of a little school girl crush is just the right remedy!" I retaliated sarcastically.

Edward glared, "What did he do that was so incredibly bad that you can't even think about the good times you had with him?"

It was my turn to glare, "How can you even ask that! You bastered!"

"You know what, I'm starting to think that what you told me was a lie...I'm also beginning to think that you're not as innocent as you say you are!" He replied.

"No, What if I told you I wasn't?" I snapped, then covered my mouth as soon as I did, "Hypothetically, of course." I added, I looked at Edward, he looked somewhere between confused and angry, so I continued, "And what about you? You've never had anyone special...have you!?" I laughed bitterly, "Why am I even asking you of all people that question? All YOU and YOUR kind do is use innocent girls and then break their hearts! I pity any girl who fell in love with you!! She was probably crushed when she found you with someone else!"

Edward froze and looked towards the floor, "In more ways then one." He whispered and looked into my eyes, I saw pain, not just any pain though...traumatizing pain...pain that I have gone through, and will proabably continue to go through for the rest of my life.

I gasped as it all clicked together, Edward actually _loved_ someone, "Oh, my God, what happened?" I said, he just stared at me very impassively, "Nothing happened. I have to go now." he said, I glanced at the clock, it was three thirty.

I followed Edward out of the room and back into the living room. Edward grabbed his jacket, his car keys, and motioned for the others to come as well. Then he gently closed the door and left.

I just stood their, shocked to the bone. I saw Alice look at me, "What happened?" she asked, I looked at her, "I don't want to talk about it." I whispered, then I went into my room and shut the door.

I heard Alice and the others knock on my door, "Bella...we're leaving now, are you okay?" she asked quietly, I took a deep breath, "Yes Alice, I'm fine...I just want to be alone."

I waited there a couple minutes before I quickly ran and opened the door, Alice was still standing there.

"Hey Alice?"

"What is it Bells?"

I sighed, "Please don't take this out on Edward...it's not his fault...it's mine."

Everyone gave me a skeptical look, but I kept my eyes on Alice, she nodded, "I won't say anything to Edward." I half smiled, "Thanks." I murmured, she smiled and rushed the others out.

With one last look at me, she closed the door.

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**Hey, I am SOOOOO incredibly sorry for the long update. I know I told you guys I would update regularly but I got side tracked and then school got in the way it was as if I had pissed life off and it was now back for revenge. I wouldn't be surprised if have of you finally gave up on waiting and was like 'F this shit I'm moving on!' Hopefully the next update will be soon. I promise it won't take this long though.**

**Please R&R**

**Thanks.**

**Blink182lover4life ^_^**


	5. Wishing you were here

**Disclaimer:** I do not own, nor will I ever own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Or Breaking Dawn. They all belong to the wonderful author Stephanie Meyer. Any of the songs you see are NOT written by me, they all belong to their respectable owners. No copyright infringement intended.

**Pairings:**Eddie/Bella, Alice/Jazzy, Emmy/Rose, Carlisle/Esme, Jacob/Angela, and Victoria/James.

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Two weeks passed since that day, those two weeks turned into two months, and those two months turned into...another month, thus making three months. I had been avoiding Edward.... But he was avoiding me too.

We didn't not speak to each other, nor did we look at each other, in Biology it was always hard, Music, Gym, and Spanish were easier, but still, it was hard.

Everytime at lunch he would always be making out with some girl in the Janitors closet. Alice and Rose spent a lot of time with me...but they didn't try to bring up what happened between me and Edward.

The only reason why I was avoiding Edward was because I had realized just minutes before Victoria and the others came home that night...that I might actually be falling for Edward.

I was scared....I talked to Victoria about it, she was worried because I was slowly falling back into depression...she was noticing my music getting a little darker, and I was always in a constant moping mode.

So she gave me two options. Option one: Give into temptation and fall for Edward and get my heart broken...again...or Option two: Completely distance myself from him. I had chose option two for personal reasons.

So here I am three months later...about to go insane because I can't stand not being in Edward's life!

I had only known the dude for three days and I was already feeling this strongly about him. (the last few months don't count because we haven't talked to eather other.)

I was slowly walking to my locker, Alice was waiting for me, very ecstatic...as always.

"Hey Alice." I said glumly, she frowned, "Why are you so mopey all the time?" She asked, I sighed again.

She asked this every morning, "I don't know." I answered, as always this was our morning routine.

"God you getting about as bad as Edward now adays." I cringed at his name, this was new...she never mentioned Edward around me...not unless...

"Oh god Alice, what are you up too!?"

She chuckled, glad my pain is so funny for her, "Relax Bella, I'm not up to anything...I just want to know if you and your band mates can come to my house and spend Christmas with us..."

I thought about this..."Yeah I'd like that...I'll have to see if the others can go...but count me in."

Alice smiled and pushed me into a bone crushing hug.

_What have I done...this is not going to end well_. I thought.

"Alice---Can't breathe!" I whispered hollowly, she dropped me, "Oops, sorry." I sighed, "Whatever...are you coming to the club tonight?" I asked, she nodded and ran to go tell the others the good news.

Later at Lunch, I sat in the usual spot, between Emmett and Alice. Jasper and Rose across from us, Edward was never here anymore, so I usually felt happier at this hour.

"That was hilarious man!" Roared Emmett, he and Jasper were telling jokes about their first football tryouts, I had to admit that they were funny. Emmett's first try out ended in him getting a concussion and two week stay at a hospital while Japser's was having to deal with twelve crying kindergartners at a time.

I wasn't eating anything for lunch, except a banana and two cups of coffee. I had another nightmare last night.

This was the worst one yet.

I had dreamed that all my friends, including....Edward, were all trying to save me and that He was there...He said they tried to protect me...and then he killed me shortly afterwards. I woke up screaming again later that night, I had dreamed that everyone I loved was dead...including my parents.

I shivered involuntary, I hated these dreams more than I hated the other one...I wonder what my parents are doing?...I wonder if they've changed...I'll give them six months, maybe give them a surprised visit...this way I will be able to tell.

Biology, of course was the same, we sat as far away from each other as possible, we didn't look at each other, and we didn't talk to each other, Music was the same as well as Gym and Spanish.

After school let out I went into the parking lot. James had given me a car, at first I didn't except it, I didn't want James to go broke because of me. Then he told me to think of it as a late birthday present...so I gradually gave in.

I eventually fell in love with the car, it was a simple car, nothing fancy, I loved it to pieces. It was a Toyota Tundra. I crawled inside and buckled my seat belt, my guitar was already in the trunk so I drove to the club.

Victoria, James, and Laurent took off the night courses for college tonight, I was glad.

"Hey guys, how was school?" I asked, Victoria pretended to gag, I smiled, "Same as usual then."

Ever since our band had been voted to play at the club we had permanently hooked up our equipment there. The only thing I carried was my guitar.

"Okay, let's do this." I said, The others smiled. I went on stage and the crowd went wild, everyone had learned all my songs by now...even though I could only play three songs a night, I let them vote. "Alright, so what songs am I playing tonight?" I asked, the crowd all shouted different songs, it made my head spin, "How about we start off with "All the small things'?" I asked, the crowed went wild, I smiled, that was by far their favorite one.

_All the small things. Tr__ue care, truth brings. _

_I'll take, one lift. You're right, best trip._

_Always, I know. You'll be at my show,_

_Watching, waiting, commiserating._

_Say it aint so, and I will not go._

_Turn the light's off, carry me home._

_Na na na na na na na na na na_

_Na na na na na na na na na na_

_Late night, come home. __Work sucks, I know._

_He left me roses by the stairs...Surprises let me know he cares._

_(All the small things by Blink 182.)_

After that song, I decided to sing a very old one, "Alright! This next song is a very old song...um you guys haven't heard it yet...so I figured it would be kind of new...it was just to give you guys a new song to learn." I shouted.

The crowd screamed, I looked through the audience and saw Alice, Rose, Emmett, Jasper, Angela, Jacob, and...._Edward?!_

He looked impassive, though he tried not to showed it I knew he was curious, I pretended like I didn't seem him, "It was about my last relationship...my boyfriend happened to be cheating on me at the time...and I could feel that something was wrong."

I took a deep breath and sighed, I glanced back at my band, they looked concerned, I smiled signaling that I was alright. "So I hope you like it...it's called 'Together'"

I took my guitar off my shoulder and sat it down gently on it's stand. I went over to the piano that we had set up months ago. I gently brushed the keys. This song was one of my favorites...I loved playing it, it was just the kind of pain I liked in a song...it showed anger as well. I began to play.

_ohhhh, Ohhhh_

_Something just isn't right, I can feel it inside._

_The truth isn't far behind me, you can't deny._

_When I turn the lights out, when I close my eyes._

_Reality overcomes me, I'm living a lie._

_When I'm alone I feel so much better._

_But when I'm around you, I don't feel..._

_Together, it doesn't feel right at all._

_Together, together we've built a wall._

_Together, holding hands we'll fall._

_Hand's we'll fall._

_This has gone on so long, I realize that a need,_

_Something good to rely on, something for me._

_When I'm alone I feel so much better._

_But when I'm around you, I don't feel..._

_Together, it doesn't feel right at all._

_Together, together we've built a wall._

_Together, holding hands we'll fall._

_Hands we'll fall._

_My heart is broken, I'm lying here._

_My thoughts are choking, on you mt dear._

_(Together, by Avril Lavigne)_

For my last song I decided to sing another oldie...but luckily they knew the words to it.

"Alright everybody! This last song is called Franklin!!!" I yelled into the microphone. The crowd screamed.

_And when we get home, I know we won't be home at all._

_This place we live, it is not where we belong._

_And I miss who we were in the town that we could call our own._

_Going back to get away after everything has changed._

_Could you remind me of a time when we were so alive?_

_Everything has changed_

_Do you remember that? Do you remember that?_

_Everything has changed_

_Could you help me push aside, all that I left behind?_

_Everything has changed_

_Do you remember that? Do you remember that?_

_So we stand here now and no one knows us at all._

_I won't get used to this._

_I won't get used to being gone._

_And going back won't feel the same if we aren't staying._

_Going back to get away after everything has changed._

(Franklin by Paramore)

"ThanK you!" I yelled as I got up, I set my guitar down and jumped off stage.

I ran to Alice, of course she was jumping up and down, "Oh Bella, that was amazing...you write so well!" she yelled, I smiled, "Thanks!" As Alice and I were talking I was soon cut off by a familiar voice.

"C'mon Alice, let's go."

It was Edward.

I turned around and saw him staring at me, I looked towards the floor, "Why are you here?" I mumbled.

"Because Alice needed a ride and wouldn't let me leave." He snapped.

I glared, "No need to bite my head off, I was just asking!"

He rolled his eyes and I glared again, and somehow his glare became more intimidating than mine, "Then maybe you shouldn't ask." He snarled as he was walking away.

I sped up, "If you're in that much of a hurry to leave then there's the door. Don't let it hit you on the way out! I'll give Alice a ride home!"

Edward stopped and glowered down at me. I suddenly felt so small. "No thank you...I pretty sure I'm capable of driving **my** own sister home!" He snapped again and then continued to walk.

I walked right passed him, turning to go back stage back stage.

Just before I left I couldn't help but mumble, "Bite me."

I could have sworn I saw a pained expression on his face, I know there was one on mine.

"Bye Bella!" called Alice, oblivious to the fight Edward and I just had.

I just waved, not caring weather she saw or not. I saw Edward speed by me a second later. Asshole!!

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**Hey guys, sorry that it took so long to update again...I can't exactly say when I'll be able to update regularly...hopefully sometime soon. Also, sorry that the chapter didn't leave on a good note...but the next chapter will be longer and more drama filled!! The kiss will either be in the next chapter or the one after it! **

**That isn't giving anything away for those who do not like spoilers...just giving you a heads up. **

**Sorry this chapter is so crappy...I have a serious case of writer's block...**

**Thanks to all who reviewed this story! You're reviews are greatly appreciated!!**

**Thank you Sasukeluv22 for introducing me to the song Franklin by Paramore!! Happy Birthday as well!!**

**Sincerely,**

**Blink182lover4life.**


	6. Happy holidays?

**Disclaimer:** I do not own, nor will I ever own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Or Breaking Dawn. They all belong to the wonderful author Stephanie Meyer. Any of the songs you see are NOT written by me, they all belong to their respectable owners. No copyright infringement intended.

**Pairings:**Eddie/Bella, Alice/Jazzy, Emmy/Rose, Carlisle/Esme, Jacob/Angela, and Victoria/James.

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A week had passed since that day, it was now December 23rd and I had officially been in school three months.

Tomorrow night Victoria, James, Laurent, and I were all going to be spending the night in the Cullen's mansion.

The down side to that was that Edward would be there.

Great. The only bright thing I had to look forward to was that hopefully he would be just as miserable as me.

Since school was out, Victoria, Alice, Rose, and I were all in the mall.

We were still shopping for Brides maids dresses and wedding gowns. So far we'd come across a few dresses, but none to our liking. Alice and Rose had come with us because Victoria had invited them to be apart of the wedding.

They'd become really good friends over the months, I was glad.

That meant less shopping trips.

"Hey look at this dress!" Called Alice as she held up a white satin dress.

It looked beautiful...my mouth hung open at the sight of it, it was perfect.

I looked at Victoria, she looked just as shocked as I was.

I smiled, "That's the one." I told Alice, she beamed.

Victoria slowly walked up to the gown, "W-where did you find this--this beautiful dress?"

Alice smiled again, "I just knew what I was looking for, it's a Mary L. Coutoure Bias cut gown. Very good designer..." she said, Victoria just kept oogling at it.

"Well that solves that dilemma!" I said, sure it wasn't a wedding gown, but it was beautiful and I'm pretty sure that Victoria didn't care whether it was or not. After all this is a beach that she's getting married on.

Rose was the next person to come across our bridesmaid dresses. "Hey, do you guys like this?" she asked and held up a beautiful pink/rose colored dress. It was strapless and long, and it didn't flare out like normal dresses, instead it clung to the body.

"OOOOOHHHHH WE LOVE IT ROSE!!!!" Yelled Alice.

And so that day we ended up buying the wedding dress and the bridesmaids as well.

The next day Victoria, James, Laurent and I were packing up for the night with the Cullen's. Apparently Alice forgot to mention to me that they were throwing a Christmas party and that we all had to be dressed up as soon as we came over.

Dammit!

I packed only the essentials: hairbrush, toothpaste, toothbrush, pair of clothes, presents (for Alice, Emmett, etc.) pj's, cell phone and, though I really didn't need it, guitar. After that I threw everything in my truck and told the others I'd see em' later.

I went to Alice's house (I had been here twice before.) And unloaded everything from my car, as usual, Alice was on the porch waiting for me. Her house was, in one word, big. Gigantic even, my house was an ant compared to hers.

It was a painted baby blue colored mansion, it takes over 12,000 sq. ft. plus a ground in heated swimming pool and spa. It over 800 acres of land. Not to mention two garages big enough to hold five cars in each.

I felt like I was at the White House.

Alice started jumping up excitedly, "Bella, so glad you could come!"

I smiled, "C'mon, the party is going to start in like five hours! We have to make sure everything is planned just right! Hey, where's the others?" she asked, I smiled again, "The others will be here in an hour, they had a lot of stuff to do...you know, call their parents, wish em' Merry Christmas, send them their presents, etc."

Alice giggled, "Sounds like their really busy..." I nodded.

Alice led me up to her room. Rose was already in there, she smiled as I sat on the bed.

Alice's room was huge, it was on the west side of the house and had THE most beautiful sunset in the world!

She had a king sized bed with a baby blue comforter, walk in closet, and bathroom as well as a 42'' plasma tv. and a wrap around sofa.

Rose's room was right next to Alice's, it was beautiful too.

A pink king sized bed, a walk in closet, and bathroom. In the middle of the room she had the most beautiful white couch you will ever see. In front of the couch was a 52'' plasma screen tv.

I sat on Alice's bed beside Rose.

"So exactly...what's going to happen tonight?" I asked, I was still a little wary on the whole formal Christmas party thing. I didn't like parties...at all.

"Oh, well, at six o' clock we make sure everything is ready, at eight o' clock, the guest arrive, and at eleven the guest leave."

I raised an eyebrow, "And who exactly are these guest?"

Alice looked to the floor guiltily, "Well, there's Carlisle, Esme, Edward, Emmett, Rose, Jasper, you, Victoria, James, Laurent, me, Gram-Gram, Aunt Cynthia, Uncle Tom, Cousin Terry, and all the others..." She mumbled.

"What's that Alice?" I asked, "Exactly _how_ many people are coming?"

Alice covered her ears, "Five hundred." she mumbled.

I looked at Rose in pure disbelief, she had done the same thing Alice did, her hands were by her ears, I took a deep breath and tried calmed myself...I really, truly did.

But it didn't work.

"WWWHHHHAAAAATTTTT!!!!" I yelled, Alice and Rose cringed, I didn't stop though, "WHY THE HELL DID YOU INVITE ME TO A PARTY WITH **FIVE HUNDRED** PEOPLE?!" I screamed.

Alice kept her hands over her ears, "W-we really wanted you to come...I actually forgot about the party....I thought you wouldn't mind...I thought you liked parties." She squeaked.

"HOW THE _HELL_ DID YOU FIGURE THAT!?" I yelled again.

How could she possibly imagine me liking parties? Surely over the months that I had known her I had mentioned _Something_ about me NOT liking parties.

Alice and Rose cringed again, I decided to tone down my voice a little.

"Sorry..." I mumbled.

All of a sudden Emmett busted through the door in nothing but a towel.

"WHO DIED?" he yelled, he looked like he just had a heart attack.

I laughed, I laughed so hard at his panicking state that I fell.

"N-no one died Emmett." Said Alice as she gave me a stare that said 'Should-I-take-her-to-the-asylum-or-something?'

I laughed harder, "What's wrong with her?" asked Emmett, Rose shrugged, "I don't know, one minute she was completely biting our heads off, and the next...she started laughing like a mad man...or...woman...as it were"

I sat up and tried to take deep breaths...but I still couldn't stop laughing, I was starting to get a stitch in my side.

"Makes you wonder if her last house _was_ an asylum." mumbled Emmett as he walked out.

I took a final breath as I stared at the door, I sighed, "So...what do we do now?" I asked. At first Alice seemed a bit wary, but then smiled when she knew I wasn't going to argue anymore.

"Well...We still have to put up the Christmas decorations on the other side of the house...and then we have to get ready." I looked at the clock, it was twelve. "Okay...but lunch first." I said, Alice and Rose nodded.

We went down into her kitchen, which was just as big, and just as fabulous as any other part of her house.

There, we made sandwiches and ate them in silence.

Emmett came down a few seconds later at the smell of food. (don't ask me how, he's just weird like that.) He made him one and ate in silence to.

After we were done Alice, Rose, Emmett, and I all put up decorations on the east side of the house.

"Where's Jasper?" I asked as I tried to put garland on the front of the door, which I was much to short for.

Thankfully Emmett helped me, by lifting me at my waist.

"Oh, he's out buying the cooking supplies with Mom." Sang Alice.

"And where are the others?" I asked, "Their all running errands. Mom and Jasper with the cooking stuff, Carlisle is out side, putting up the outside decorations with Edward." I cringed, I hadn't seen nor spoken to Edward since that night.

"So what's Esme going to cook? Can I help?" I asked, trying to change the subject. Thanfully Alice bit on the bait. "Oh, Sure you can help, the more the merrier....I'm really not sure what Mom's cooking though."I sighed, this was going to be a long night.

The others arrived later than they said they would. In fact, they didn't get here until exactly six o' clock.

Alice, Rose, Esme, Victoria and I all were in Rose's room getting ready. James, Emmett, Laurent, Jasper, Carlisle and Edward were doing the same thing.

"Let's get started!" Said Alice as she she opened Rose's closet. Victoria and I let our jaws drop as we stared at the luxurious evening gowns Rose had.

Alice ignored our stares, "Okay Bella, you first."

I frowned.

"No." I said snapped.

Alice sighed, "Fine, you last."

I smiled. Victoria went first, she found her dress in a matter of seconds. It was a long, curve hugging, white satin halter dress. For shoes she chose silver, toe-peeking heels then she straightened her beautiful, curly hair, making it silky smooth and put on silver earrings and a diamond necklace to match her engagement ring.

Esme was next, she had a black, spaghetti strap curve hugging dress, for the shoes she chose black, toe-peeking heels. She decided to leave her hair down, and only clip on side back. She wore a silver heart and matching earrings.

Alice was next, she chose a knee high, black, one shoulder dress with a silver sequined back finish. For shoes, she chose silver stilettos, for jewelry she chose a silver diamond studded choker necklace, and a diamond bracelet.

Rose was next, she chose a hot red strapless dress, that flared out when she spun, she chose cherry-red colored pumps that wrapped around her ankles and she curled her wavy, golden blonde hair and wore a silver chained Tiffany's necklace, matching bracelet, and diamond earrings.

Unfortunately I was next.

I sat their waiting for my impending doom. I was going to HATE this, just as much as I was going to HATE to see Edward. I sighed as Alice dragged me into the closet she immediately made me try on a dress.

It was a red La Jolla spaghetti strapped gown. It hugged all of my curves and flared out when I spun. It was similar to Rose's but you could definitely not get these dresses mixed up. I decided to wear this dress and some silver pumps. I wore a diamond necklace and matching bracelet and earrings. My hair was curled and half was pulled, and clipped by a diamond brettt in the back. I let the shorter pieces of my hair hang on the sides of my face.

After we were dressed, we all applied our make up.

Then we came downstairs to greet the guys and make sure everything was in place.

As soon as I came down the stairs, my eyes immediately locked with Edward's. He was, as the rest of them, in a black tux, with a red tie. He looked as if he was trying to hide his shock, he gave me half a smile and looked at Emmett.

My eyes followed his, I stared at Emmett and Jasper who looked like they were going drop onto the floor and start having convulsions.

I smiled, Rose and the others came down after me and I actually thought Emmet went into shock when he saw Rose. Jasper too. I walked over to James and Laurent and spun, "How do I look?" I asked, Victoria went over to James and planted a kiss on his cheek.

"Absolutely wonderful." Crooned Laurent. James nodded, I blushed lightly.

I walked over to Edward and took a deep breath, "Hey you." I said as he turned around.

He smiled, "Hey."

I stood their a second, what the hell was I going to say?

I hadn't talked to Edward in months...except for that night but things didn't end so well there...so I decided not to count that.

I smiled and was about to turn to walk away.

"Bella?" he asked as he grabbed my hand, "Yes?"

He stayed silent for a moment, "Bella, can I ask a favor of you?" I raised an eyebrow, "Sure." He sighed, "Listen...I know things haven't been so well between us in the last couple of months...but for tonight...and tonight only, would you mind putting all that behind us?"

I looked to the floor, "Sure." I mumbled.

He let my hand go instantly and mumbled a 'Thanks' and walked away.

It was now eight o' clock and the guest were finally arriving.

I was in the dance room watching everyone else dance and having a good time.

Jasper was dancing with Alice, while Emmett danced with Rose.

The song ended and Emmett came over, "Hey Bells!" he shouted, I smiled, "Hey Emmett, how's it going?"

He smiled, "Well, Rose and I are probably going to end the night a little early...like around ten or something and sneak up into my----"

"Okay, I don't need to know!" I said as I covered my ears.

He laughed, "I'm joking Bells, man you should have seen your face!"

I rolled my eyes, "You're such a pig!" I snapped and looked away blushing...well, actually I looked at Edward dancing with Rose.

Emmett followed my gaze, "Do you like Edward?"

I nearly choked on the little roll that I was eating, "W-what?...Don't be ridiculous...that's...that's absurd!"

He chuckled, "What's so funny?" I asked.

"You are."

I raised my eyebrows, he rolled his eyes, "Oh please, you _say_ you don't like him...yet you constantly have this longing in your eyes to be near him."

I shot my eyebrows up a little higher, when did Emmett become so deep? Longing in my eyes? What the hell!

"I. Don't. Like. Edward." I said, I could feel the blush on my cheeks rising and looked away from Emmett.... and Edward.

Emmett chuckled again. "Okay Bells, I get it, you_ don't_ like him." I glared.

He rolled his eyes and walked away, still chuckling. I sighed and walked out of the dancing room, I needed some air.

I went out on the balcony and looked up to the sky. As my eyes fell on a star, I smiled. I always loved looking at the stars, even when I was little. They were fun, and pretty to look at.

Counting them helped passed the time...it helped me fall asleep.

"Whatcha' looking at?" I jumped and turned around and nearly crashed into Edward.

I smiled quickly, "Just the stars...something I use to do as a child."

He smiled and looked up at the sky, "Tonight is lovely isn't it?"

I nodded, "Yeah...out my window, back at Forks, if it would stop raining long enough so you could see the sky, you could get a perfect view of the moon...I've always loved the moon."

Edward just smiled, "So what brings you out here? Shouldn't you be in there dancing?"

I scowled, "Yes."

Edward raised his eyebrow, "And your not because?..."

My scowel became deeper, "Emmett."

Edward raised both his eyebrows this time, "What did he do?"

I sighed, "He...uh...played a joke on me..."

I blushed, Edward laughed. Then I closed my eyes and smiled a little, it felt so good to hear his voice again, I relished in this moment.

When I opened my eyes back up, I found Edward's hand held out in front of me.

I looked up at him with an amused expression, "Would you like to dance?" He asked, I smiled and raised my eyebrow.

He chuckled, "I promise, no jokes." I chuckled too and placed my hand delicately in his, "I'd love to...but..."

He raised an eyebrow, "But....what?"

I looked to the ground, "I can't dance." I mumbled.

He laughed, and pulled me into him, "Then I'll have to show you." I stared at him wide eyed, "Okay." I breathed.

He led me back onto the dancing floor, and slowly turned around just as a new song started.

He slid his hands around my waist and I looped my hands around his neck.

I played with the back of his hair and looked into his eyes, those beautiful, forest green eyes.

His grip tightened around my waist, pulling me closer to him, I couldn't help but blush at the close proximity between us. I rested my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes and let him lead and do all of the dance steps while I breathed in his scent.

He smelled so good.

For three months I longed to be this close to him again, to smell his scent, to smile and look in his eyes.

I was so caught up in my thoughts I didn't notice how close I was to him until the song ended. We danced right along into the next song.

"You're doing great." He said as he twirled me around, I fell back into him almost immediately. "I don't want this to end." I whispered, He put his head down so he could whisper in my ear, "It doesn't have to...not tonight."

I sighed, and pulled back, "But only for tonight, right?"

He looked away, I put my hands on his shoulders, "Why can't we just put the past behind us for good...go back to the way things used to be?"

He sighed and pulled me into him again.

"Because.....it's.....complicated."

I shook my head, "No, us not talking to each other is ridiculous, we were fine before I...before_ that_ day...and I'm sorry, I'm so extremely sorry...I just want us to be friends again."

I looked into his eyes, they were now a soft green color.

He sighed, "Is that so?"

I felt myself on the brink of tears, I was starting to panic, what if he said no?

"Yes, I...I miss you Edward...I miss yelling at you, I miss you always being there when I fall apart. I miss you not coming to any of my performances...sure Alice and the others come but...it's starting to feel like before...."

Edward looked at me curiously, "Before what?"

I closed my eyes, damn, I'd been caught.

"Before I moved here....I'll tell you about it later...when it's just us." I said and quirked my head to the side so he could see Alice staring at us with a huge smile on her face.

He looked back at me, "She can't here us." he inquired, "But I'll feel more comfortable." I intervened he nodded.

"So you miss me huh?" he mused.

I nodded, "Yes, very much..."

He sighed, "I guess it wouldn't be too much of a pain to deal with you again...."

I felt my eyes go wide and my heart stop for two heart beats I stared in his eyes, they looked pained,

"I miss you too Bella, I want to be friends again as well, maybe even friends with benefits or something---"

I smacked his arm, he laughed as I sighed in relief, "So does this mean I'm forgiven?" I asked and looked at him with pleading eyes, he ruffled my hair.

"You were never blamed." he said.

I raised my eyebrow, "So, the whole three months no talking thing? What the _hell_ was that about?"

He smiled, "You kept your distance too." he reminded me, I scowled, "I had my reasons." I mumbled.

He heard, "And I had mine." he shot back, then grinned.

I rolled my eyes as we continued to dance, "By the way," he said casually, "You look beautiful tonight."

I smiled and rested my head on his shoulder, "And you look totally tempting, _very_ handsome." I murmured as I kissed his cheek.

He looked at me quite shocked, then smiled slyly, "Tempting enough for a night with..._benefits?" _he said seductively, I shivered, and looked up at him, He pulled me tighter to him, I could feel his hot breath on my face.

I smiled "You wish."

He chuckled.

After the party we all decided to go to bed and clean up tomorrow.

I went into the guest room, gave Rose back her dress, earrings, bracelet, necklace, and shoes then I took a shower and put on my bright blue spaghetti strap tank top and purple boy cut shorts.

I laid down in the bed and felt my whole body sink in. It felt so comfortable, even better than my own bed.

I fell asleep quickly, but I woke up an hour later slightly screaming.

Thank goodness it wasn't loud. I sat there panting, covered in sweat, I was crying again too.

I went into the bathroom and washed my face, then I snuck out of my room and tip-toed into the kitchen.

I was surprised to see that I was not alone, Edward was here too!

"What's up?" I said trying to stop the shaking in my voice, Edward got up from the table, "Nightmare?" he asked, I nodded.

There was a moment of silence, after Edward could see that I was about to break down, he embraced me in a hug and started whispering soothing things.

I clenched my teeth, hard.

I wasn't going to cry, not again, I was so sick of crying. I started to whimper, but not cry, "Shhh, it's okay, you can cry...I don't mind." Edward said, and I started letting tears fall.

Shit.

I held onto him tighter than ever.

After I calmed down he sat me down at the kitchen table.

He pushed the ice cream jar he had been eating out of, to me. I thanked him and started eating. Mmmm, it was green mint chocolate chip, my favorite.

"So...are you actually going to tell me what it was this time?" he asked, I looked at the ice cream, "It...was about my ex boyfriend...and my friend."

I tried to stomach the memories of my nightmare again. The only thing I was going to leave out was the rape...In time I probably will tell Edward about it, nut not tonight.

"Go on." Edward said.

I sighed, "Seth Clearwater was my best friend, we met when we were only four years old.....He cared a lot about me, maybe more than he ever let on."

I stopped to wipe my tears away then continued, "Well, the day that..._He_asked me out on a date I was ecstatic. I immediately ran to tell Seth, thinking that he would be just as thrilled....Seth hated it. We got into a fight and didn't speak to each other for weeks. After the break up, I came crying to him. He comforted me and told me everything was going to be fine, that he would protect me. He walked with me to school that day, my ex was there, of course. He saw me and Seth holding hands...and thought we were together."

I paused and took a deep breath, "Seth went missing the day after, no ones seen him since." My voice cracked, I started shaking again.

I started crying as I felt my stomach lurch. I knew he was dead.

Immediately I was in Edward's arms again, "In my nightmare, I found Seth...only he was dead." I whispered.

Edward just kept on trying to soothe me.

We were walking idly toward my room whispering so we wouldn't wake the others, "Bella, can I ask you a question?" Asked Edward.

"Sure."

He hesitated, "A personal question?"

I looked to the floor, "Oh."

He held my hand, "Please?"

I sighed, "Your here if I need you right?"

He smiled, "Aren't I always?" I rolled my eyes, though he probably couldn't see, "What's the question?"

Edward hesitated again, "Why don't you ever call your ex-boyfriend by name? Why is it always..._He_?"

I froze, I let a moment go by before I began to speak again.

"Because it hurts to talk about him...I haven't said his name in one year. It's forbidden to me."

He raised his eyebrow but let it go.

As we were walking I suddenly lost my balance and fell through an open door.

Edward tried to catch me, which he did, but he couldn't stop himself from falling in the process.

So Edward fell and then I landed on him, the door shut, and I prayed to God that, that clicking noise wasn't an automatic lock.

I looked down toward Edward and could barely see, luckily we had a little bit of moon light shining in.

I could feel Edward's body heat radiating onto me.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

Edward chuckled, "Better than okay."

Confused, I looked at our awkward position and caught on quickly.

I tried to pick myself up and off of Edward, he just tightened his grasp around me.

"You'd feel better if you were standing up." I said but he just chuckled again, "No, I like it better this way." I sighed and gave up trying to fight him, I just laid my head on his chest, listening to his heart beat.

I faintly wondered what the others would think if they found us like this...I felt the blush in my face go into a deep burgundy.

I could feel my heart thumping hard against my chest, I guess Edward got the reaction that he wanted because when I tried to get up this time he had no arguments.

I rolled over to Edward's left side and sat up.

He sat up as well.

"We should try to get out." I said as I stood up. Edward just grabbed me and pulled me back down, "It's no use, the door has an automatic lock...we're stuck here until morning."

I heard him smirk, "Dammit!" I cursed as a sat back down.

I sighed, "So, what are we going to do until morning?" I asked, though I wish I hadn't.

"Well, I can think of one thing..." he trailed, I rolled my eyes, "No."

He sighed, "Well, we could try to go back to sleep."

I smiled, "That's better."

I laid down next to him, it was pretty cold, and I doubt that sleeping on the floor in a tank top and boy shorts would help keep me warm.

Thus my only option was Edward...which I kind of liked.

"No funny business." I mumbled as he wrapped his arm around my waist.

"Wouldn't dream of it." He replied, I could definitely here a smile in his voice.

"I like what your wearing." he mumbled seductively in my ear, I tensed slightly as he pulled me tighter, "It really shows off your curves."

I could feel a blush creeping up on me again, I thanked heaven that it was dark. Then I turned to face him, and blushed at the close proximity.

"Do you really have your mind that set on sleeping with me?"

"Maybe...it depends." he said with a sigh.

"Well I do wish you'd make up your damn mind, you know damn well that I hate players."

He laughed, "God I've missed you." He said as he hugged me tighter.

I smiled, nothing could ruin this moment.

I heard him sigh again, "Don't you see Bella? I never want you to say yes to me...I want you to stay different."

I was confused, "Then why do you joke around?" I asked, he shrugged, "I guess I just wanted to see your breaking point...I never dreamed you would confront me about it."

He chuckled, "I guess that's why you haven't bored me to pieces yet."

I raised an eyebrow, but I forgot he couldn't see, "What do you mean?" I asked, he shifted around and propped his elbow up so that his head rested on it.

"All the other girls, that I've ever dated...they were all the same, all they wanted was me and popularity...and some became a little to clingy...as in me 24/7. I know it's hard to believe, but I actually have a life...other than making out with girls. But you were the first girl that ever said no...you were the first girl to ever yell at me...besides Alice and Rose. And you were the first girl that ever had a mystery behind her...I must say, you are a very interesting girl to figure out. Your reactions are always....so calm and relaxed. You never freak out, except when your angry...you never say 'like' after every sentence. And your the first girl I've ever known that is ticklish on her stomach."

He ran his fingers across my stomach, I laughed struggled to get away from him, he was laughing too, "See what I mean?" he said, I sat up, as did he.

We were both still laughing, "That wasn't fair, I wasn't ready!" I said as I tackled him.

He laughed and just held me there, I sighed and laid my head down on his chest, "Fine, you win." I mumbled, I swear I saw him smile.

"You give up to easily." he said, I rolled my eyes and tumbled off him, "Yeah well, your too strong."

"It's all that football training, it's not fair."

He chuckled, "Oh please, you're just jealous."

By that time we were both getting a little weary, I felt my eyes get heavy with sleep.

We were now sitting up and resting our heads on each other, mine was on his shoulder and his was on top of my head.

"Can I ask you one more question?" he asked.

"Hm." I mumbled.

"While we were dancing you said that you would tell me about something...something you were feeling before you moved here."

I opened my eyes, there was no reason to lie, so I answered swiftly, "Before I moved here, I was feeling a little....unloved."

I looked up at him and could imagine the confused face he was giving me.

"My parents...weren't doing the best parenting and...I was beginning to think that they didn't care anymore. Of course I had Victoria, and James, and Laurent...and when I would look out into the audience, I would see friends, friends I made at school... or friends that I made at the bar..."

Edward gave me a concerned look when I mentioned bar, "No Edward, I don't drink." I said, answering his unsaid question.

"It was mainly Seth who came though, " My voice shook a little on Seth, "But as many friends as I had there...I would never actually see the two people I wanted to see most...my parents. Of course, I knew they would never be there, I never told them I was in a band...though they probably wouldn't care. They didn't care about anything I did...they were never there for me...especially when I needed them the most; When Seth went missing, My big break up...nothing. That's why I have such a strong relationship with Victoria and the others."

I looked at Edward, he was silent for a moment and hesitated a little when he spoke, "So...is that why you were so happy to see me when I first came to your show? You think of me as your _dad_?"

I laughed, "No idiot, I don't think of you as my dad...When I saw you from the stage...I felt...like someone actually cared. Like, you really weren't as bad as the Player you made yourself out to be...the fact that you actually put the effort into coming and watching me...it just felt...nice. I felt...truly cared for. When I was dating..._Him_, he never came. Not once."

I smiled and nuzzled closer to him, "You're a really great friend...I'm so glad everything worked out...I'm even more glad that we're finally talking to each other again."

There was a grave silence before he spoke again, "I'm sorry."

I scrunched my eyebrows down, "Why?"

He slowly put his arm around my shoulder, "I should have come to your performances, I'm sorry." I half smiled and slung my arm over his shoulder too, "Don't be sorry, if anything look foward to making it up to me."

He smiled, "That makes it a little better." I kissed his cheek and rested my head on his shoulder.

The next time I opened my eyes, I could see.

It was light out, I looked to my left and saw two windows.

The sun was just popping up, it was a beautiful sunrise... It was snowing too.

I sighed, it was nice not waking up to the blaring sound of Laurent's alarm clock.

I looked to my right and saw Edward still sleeping. I smiled and ran my fingers through his hair. It was so soft, that beautiful reddish/brown hair.

I saw him stir in his sleep and flip over to his side. I stifled a laugh and slowly tried to get up.

"Where are you going?" He mumbled, I jumped and whipped my head around, his eyes were still closed but a smiled played on his face.

I chuckled and sat back down, "You are to clever for your own good." I said and ruffled his hair.

"Merry Christmas." He said sleepily as he sat up right again.

I smiled, "Merry Christmas." I mumbled and snuggled myself closer to him.

I didn't realize that it had gotten so much colder than last night. Edward slung his arm around my shoulders trying to keep me warm. I smiled as I thought back to last night, then I froze as something clicked in my head.

Where were the tears? The panting? The screaming?

I turned to Edward, "Did I scream last night?"

He shook his head.

"Cry?"

He shook is head again.

"Wake up terrified?"

He smiled as did I, "That's the first."

It was then that we heard foot steps. I looked to Edward to see if he could guess who it was, "It's probably my parents." He whispered.

We both got up while the foot steps came closer, "HEY!!! LET US OUT!"

We yelled, "HELP! WE"RE STUCK!!! THE DOOR'S LOCKED!"

We listened as the foot steps came closer to the door. I sighed in relief, "Thank God they heard us."

Edward raised his eyebrow, "Would it really be so bad if they didn't?"

I pretended to think about that while he hit my arm playfully. We heard the door unlock and now stared at the faces of Carlisle and Esme Cullen.

"Thank you so much." I said, Esme just raised her eyebrows, I guess she knew about Edward's reputation.

I put my hands up defensively and backed away from Edward as far as I could, "Nothing happened, I swear. I was just going to the kitchen to get a glass of water and Edward was down there. We were going straight up to bed when I fell through the door."

Esme raised both her eyebrows up this time...then smiled, as did Carlisle. "We weren't assuming that you and Edward did anything...Your a way to classy girl to be like Edward's tramps....*Glares at Edward* We just find it funny that you guys slept in the closet all night, didn't Edward tell you that all you had to do was pull the switch by the door?"

I glared at Edward, "No...Edward didn't." I said through clenched teeth.

He smiled sheepishly at me, "Merry Christmas?" He said, Carlisle and Esme laughed.

I just smacked him on the arm. Carlisle and Esme laughed harder, "Come on kids, I'll make you guys some breakfast." said Esme.

On the way out the closet I held Edward back, 'I'm going to get you back for this." I warned, he just gave me his resolve crushing, butterfly jumping, heart fluttering, crooked smile, "I'll be waiting."

After breakfast I went to go wake up Alice, Rose, and Victoria.

"WAKE UP GIRLS!!! IT'S CHRISTMAS!!!!" I yelled to the top of my lungs, I heard Edward yell the exact same phrase to Emmett, Jasper, James, and Laurent. Then I heard mumbles, groans, and had to avoid feathered pillows.

After everyone was woken up I decided to take a shower. I came out and brushed my hair and teeth. Then I dressed in jeans and a sweat shirt.

We all sat around the family room. I looked at Edward who looked at me and smiled. He was wearing a navy blue sweatshirt and Hollistar jeans.

I sat on the couch with Alice and Rose. Victoria and James sat on the love seat. Carlisle and Esme sat on the other love seat. Emmett sat beside Rose, and Jasper sat on the other side of Alice. Edward sat in the floor in front of me with Laurent.

Then we started opening presents. Alice went first, "Here Emmett!" She yelled ecstatically, Emmett ripped it open in two seconds.

"WOW! You got me two tickets to see the Indianapolis Colts at the Superbowl!"

I couldn't help but laugh, he looked so happy, like a four year old who just won a free ride to Busch Gardens.

I sighed and handed him my present, "Here Emmett this is from James, Victoria, Laurent, and me."

Emmett looked hungrily at the gift, I could definitely tell this was his favorite holiday.

He unwrapped the wrapping paper and jumped up and down causing more laughter.

"Thank you!!!" he nearly shouted as he gave me a hug. I laughed.

I got him a football helmet which was autographed by all the NFL running backs. Which is the exact position that he plays, how ironic.......not.

I then gave my present to Jasper, which was an autographed jersey by all the NFL wide receivers, after him came Edward, which was an autographed football of every NFL quarter back.

I all recieved hugs, though Edward's lasted longest.

Then I gave my presents to Carlisle, (a beautiful silver watch with his name on the inside.) Esme, (a Tiffany's necklace in a heart that had her name in it as well.) Alice, (two concert tickets to see Linkin' Park.) Rose, (two free tickets to six flags, Emmett was just to happy for words, which was also too funny for words.)

Then I gave Victoria and James a free ticket to Florida for a weekend getaway, then for Laurent I gave him two tickets to a Korn concert.

After I gave Everybody their presents. (I also gave Angela and Jacob one too, for Angie, it was a T-shirt from New York, and Estee Lauder's perfume called 'Pleasures', and for Jacob, it was the newest ipod that could hold up to three thousand songs. In return I got a wolf pendant necklace from Jake and a free trip to the store Journey's from Angie. I could spend up to $800.)

After I gave them all my presents I was handed mine.

From Alice I received two tickets to see Simple Plan in concert, from Rose I got a bottle of perfume that smells like roses, it wasn't even in stores yet. From Jasper I got two tickets to eat at this very expensive restaurant, from Emmett I got Xbox, (don't ask why. I loved it anyway though.)

From Esme and Carlisle I got a diamond bracelet from Tiffany's, and from Victoria, James, and Laurent I got a free trip to all the shops in the mall.

Finally it was Edward's turn, "Here." he mumbled as he handed me the biggest present I've seen so far. It was huge!

"Thanks." I muttered as I opened it.

I opened the case and laid my eyes on the newest electric guitar by Ibanez. It was a candy apple red Ibanez with black flames to be exact. And in the corner there were autographs, but not just any autographs, five Simple Plan autographs, and three Blink 182 ones. I smiled and looked up to him, "Thank you." I breathed, and gave him a bone crushing hug. He just smiled, "Anytime."

After I had recieved all of my presents, the others soon gave each others theirs.

Afterwards, we all ran out to enjoy the snow. I was helping to build a snow man when I realized that I was shivering and completely numb, I laughed when I realized that the others were shivering too.

We'd been out in the snow for three hours, and all our faces were red and numb.

"I think I'm going to go heat up inside for a moment guys." I said while I started trudging up to the front of the house.

"Me too!"

I heard Jasper shout as he came after me.

"Hey Bells, how you holding up?" he asked. We were now walking at a slower pace, "Fine, Fine, I can't feel my face, but fine."

He started to laugh, "This is the first snow that we've had here in four years." I stared at him wide eyed, "Are you serious?" I asked, he nodded.

"Back at Forks, it was almost guaranteed that it would snow, and if it didn't, then it would signal the end of the world or something."

I laughed at that thought, end of the world at Forks. Hilarious. Jasper looked at me amused, "Maybe that's where Alice and I should go next winter." I rolled my eyes, Jasper constantly thought about Alice, no matter what.

We were now entering the house, Jasper decided to make some hot chocolate, which I thanked him for.

After I was finished drinking it, I went into the living room, curled up in a blanket, and turned on the TV. I decided to watch Elf, mainly because it was funny and I was too lazy to change the channel.

Jasper followed me into the room and sat down on the love seat, curled up into his own blankets. For the first fifteen minutes we watched Elf and laughed. Then when a commercial came Jasper started talking.

"So Bells...I heard that you and Edward spent the night together."

I froze, how the hell did Jasper find out?

"No, no, no, no, no, you heard wrong, we didn't actually _spend_ the night together, we just slept together."

Jasper raised his eyebrows, I realized how that sounded and immediately started correcting myself, "That's not what I meant! What I meant was, I had a nightmare and came down into the kitchen to get a....uh...a glass of water, Edward was already down here and so we decided to go up to our rooms together. That's when I lost my balance and fell through the open closet door. Edward tried to catch me, but fell in as well. The door clicked and Edward told me that the door was automatically locked and that we had to wait until morning to get out. So I just decided to go back to sleep...end. Of. Story."

Jasper busted out laughing, I started to blush, "Man, I should've done that with Alice...then again she probably would have at least _checked_ to see if there was any other way out."

I rolled my eyes, "So who told you that I slept with him?" I asked, Jasper smiled, "No one, my room was the room right next to the closet...I heard a lot of bumping around and I just guessed it was Edward fooling around." I mouthed an 'Oh'.

That's when the others came in, "I can't feel my face!" cried Alice.

Rose was just laughing as Emmett carried her around the house. Jasper sat up and hugged Alice.

Emmett threw Rose gently on the couch and kissed her. Victoria and James and Laurent decided to go home and get together with their college friends. Carlisle and Esme decided to for a ride and give us some time together.

So every one was all lovey dovey with each other...except me, and I suddenly felt the urge to have somebody to hold and love.

Which was kind of depressing.

Then Edward came in and suddenly my mood disappeared. I smiled as he sat next to me, we watched the others, Jasper and Alice were in a full make out session, which looked like they were about to sneak upstairs.

Emmett and Rose were on the couch.

I looked at Edward who looked just as uncomfortable here as me. He looked at me and smiled, "You want to go somewhere else?" he asked, I nodded almost immediately and we both bolted out the front door.

We were running just oustide the front of the house when Edward grabbed my hand and started carrying me to a place I've never been before.

"Where are we going?"

Edward just smiled and quickened his pace. He took me out about a mile away from the house into a patch of woods.

I felt a twinge of fear when I entered the forest and shivered, but the fear soon turned into awed amazement, I stood there, mouth agape and eyes wide.

It was the most beautiful spot that I've ever seen. Though the trees were dead, they looked beautiful covered snow, and in the middle of the forest there was a frozen pond.

I looked back at Edward who was smiling, "This is usually the place I go to when I need to think."

"It's...beautiful, I've never seen anything like it." I said as I looked around again.

I saw him smirk, "I thought you'd like it. One of the reasons why I brought you here."

I raised my eyebrow, "Just _one_ of the reasons?" He chuckled and walked over to me, "The other was to see how well you can ice skate."

I raised both my eyebrows this time, "I'll have you know buddy, that I ice skated all the time in Forks."

Edward raised his eyebrows this time, "And exactly how long ago was that?"

I pursed my lips, "Well, I was about... twelve maybe?"

Edward laughed, "This should be good." He mumbled as he threw a bag for me to catch. I caught it and opened it to find a pair of ice skates. I quickly put them on and walked over to the pond where Edward was already waiting.

I looked at the pond and laughed, "This is going to be embarrassing." I muttered as I looked at Edward, who chuckled and walked over beside me, "If it makes you feel any better, I'm not a pro at this myself."

I rolled my eyes as a held onto his arm and slowly put my foot on the ice. As soon as I was balanced I slowly put my other foot on.

I held onto Edward for dear life, he slowly pushed me onto the ice.

I wobbled a little bit, then I slowly became more confident. Ice skating was like riding a bicycle...you never forget.

So I wasn't surprised when I found myself skating at full speed. However, I was taken by full surprised when I leaped up and fell right on my back. "Ow." I muttered as I just laid there.

I heard Edward skating over to me, chuckling lowly, "You okay?" he asked, I rolled my eyes and held up my hand for him to pull me up, "Never better." I said sarcastically. Edward pulled me up but I lost my balance again and pulled Edward down on top of me.

We stared at each other for what seemed like forever and as much as I didn't want to, I got up.

I lifted Edward up and we skated together, holding hands, keeping each others balance in perfect rhythm.

"Try something with me." He said as he took my other hand and faced me. I laughed as we started skating backwards and forwards, then he started skating in a circle.

We went faster and faster and faster until we were actually flung in the snow. We were laughing as we sat up, "I'm going to be covered in bruises tomorrow." I muttered and got up.

"Ow." Edward said as he got up too, I laughed harder when he fell back down. I ran to get the bag with our shoes in it. I gave Edward his and put on mine.

"Man I haven't had this much fun since...since ever." I mumbled as Edward and I were walking through the forest.

Edward stayed silent, I sighed, "Thank you."

He smirked, "No problem."

I stopped walking, "Can I ask you a question?" I asked, Edward raised an eyebrow, "Um, sure."

I pursed my lips, "Actually, can I ask you two questions?"

Edward narrowed his eyes skeptically, "Yeah, I guess."

I smiled, "Okay, question number one...Why me? Why am I the only one who gets to see all your secret hideouts?"

He was silent for a moment, "Because...I...trust you."

I raised my eyebrows asking him to explain some more.

He sighed, "To be honest, I don't know...it's like...I want you to know stuff about me...I want to show you what I like and how I feel...it's rather hard to explain."

I nodded, "To be honest, I rather like knowing your secrets that nobody else knows." I said.

He chuckled, "Feelings mutual. So can I ask you a question?"

"Sure."

"Why won't you tell me your biggest secret of all?"

I swallowed, hard.

I was going to avoid it but the look in his eyes was a pleading one. He really wanted to help me.

I sighed, "I want to tell you...but I can't right now. Not until I know I'm safe. In do time I will tell you, just not now."

He at first looked skeptically at me, as if my answer was enough and then he gave me an understanding look, "I understand. There's something I will tell you as well...in do time."

I smiled, "Okay...going back to the subject now, question number two...How'd you know exactly what I'd want for Christmas? How'd you know exactly who's autographs I'd want in the corner?"

Edward laughed, "You would not believe the trouble I went through to get you that." I laughed with him, he sighed, "Well, first I had to ask Victoria, then I had to find one store willing to let me buy the guitar before it was in stores. Then I had to fly all the way to North Carolina and drive from Raleigh to Virginia Beach to go to a Simple Plan concert. I used my backstage pass and got the band to sign the guitar. Their really nice and David is hilarious!" I laughed.

"Then...since Blink 182 broke up...I had to go to a +44 concert...and then Angels and Airwaves one...I did the same thing with Simple Plan and went back stage. Tom and Mark are also quite funny!"

I smiled and hugged him again, "Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!" I said as I hugged him tighter.

He hugged me back very loosely "Can't----Breathe-----!" He choked out, I let him go almost instantly, "Sorry, it looks like Alice is rubbing off on me."

I sighed, "I like this." I admitted, Edward held my hand, "Like what?"

I smiled, "Just being able to be me."

Edward raised his eyebrows, "What do you mean?"

I grinned, "I like not having any worries, I like not always being the 'stressed out Bella' I like not waking up screaming in the middle of the night, etc. etc."

Edward smiled, "You know, I kind of like this too."

We stared in each others eyes, then Edward _had_ to break the moment and look at his watch, "We've been out here for three hours. We should get home." he mumbled, I nodded.

He started to turn around, "Edward?" I asked, he turned around and I was suddenly overcome by a new feeling.

A feeling of lust and longing and fiery passion. And before I knew it, my lips were crushed on his.

His arms immeadiatly slipped around my waist, pulling me closer to him.

He kissed me back and ran his tongue along my bottom lip asking for entrance. I decided to play hard to get and didn't let him in.

We both fought for dominance.

He bit my lip, this time demanding entrance and I reluctantly let him in, because I was getting just as impatient as he was.

We let our tongues explore each others mouths. I moved even closer to him wanting to be nearer.

The only thing keeping me from being even closer to him was our clothes. I ran my hands under his sweatshirt and felt his rock hard abs and warm skin against my hands. He shivered and picked me up and backed me to a tree. I wrapped my legs around his waist and pulled him closer.

He started trailing kisses down my neck, he started to suck on it and I was sure he gave me a hickey.

I gently grazed his ear. He shivered again and smiled into the kiss. My arms were encircled around his neck while my hands were wildly in his hair.

His hands were around my waist and were...actually staying there.

I smiled and took my hands and placed them on his. His lips found mine again. I moaned as we deepened the kiss, it was perfect.

We kept this rhythm for a while then as Edward started to pull away I sucked on his bottom lip for a couple seconds.

He growled as he moved back in and kissed me with renewed passion.

He bit my lip demanding entrance, I let him in and kept up with his pace. He started to pull back but I put my hands to his face and kept him there.

He put his hands back to my face and pulled me closer to him.

Then, when I wasn't expecting it, he broke away.

"Don't stop." I whispered.

He rested his head against mine, we were only mere centimeters away from another kiss.

We were both panting, "This is wrong, I--we shouldn't do this." he said huskily, I put my hands to his face, "Don't do this, not today. We'll think about the consequences tomorrow." I said and kissed him again, but he pulled away, "No, we need to think about this today. This is wrong. I'll just end up hurting you." I looked in his eyes, they held the same longing and passion as mine did.

I knew he didn't want to stop, I sure as hell didn't but he was right.

I nodded and he moved away.

We walked back to the house in dead silence, Edward hadn't looked at me since we left the forest.

I was worried about that, what if he went back to not talking to me? I don't think I could bear it now, it was hard enough last time.

As the house came within view I decided to make small talk, "So...What happens now." I asked as I kept my eyes to the ground, Edward didn't say anything, I waited a little longer and he still didn't say anything.

I risked a glanced at him, he wasn't looking at me, "Hello, anyone in there?" I asked as I waved my hand in front of him.

He snapped his eyes to me, "What?" he asked, I looked away, "What are we going to do now?" I asked, he was silent for a moment.

He took a deep breath, "I don't know...I'm really confused at the moment.'' I nodded and we both quickened our pace to the house. Once we were there he immediately went up to his room. I went to Alice's room and collected my stuff.

Unfortunately Alice and Rose were in there.

"Hey Bella, where'd you run off too?" Asked Alice.

I sighed. I wasn't in the mood to be near friends, for I too, was confused.

I forced a smile, "You mean before or after you and Jasper, Emmet and Rose, started making out?"

Rose and Alice blushed, "Sorry." They mumbled, I rolled my eyes and started packing up my stuff.

"Bella Marie Swan! Is that a hickey?" Shouted Alice as she pointed to my neck.

I covered it up, "No! I was scratching my neck before I came into the room!" I defended, Rose rolled her eyes, "Oh please, we know a hickey when we see one! So who gave it to you?"

I clenched my teeth, "This is not a hickey, I was scratching my neck."

I immediately grabbed my bag and stalked out the room.

I went over to Edward's room and knocked on the door. He answered but he wasn't surprised that it was me.

I didn't pay attention to him and walked right into his room like I owned it.

He shut the door. I looked around, this was the first time I had ever been in here. It had white walls, bed and carpet.

In the room was a 56" plasma screen Tv, a black wrap around couch, and posters everywhere.

On a shelf were a whole bunch of trophies, football no doubt. And a gigantic window.

I sighed and turned around, he was waiting for me to talk, "What are we going to to?" I asked again, he looked away, "Dammit Edward, if we're not going to fucking get together, why the hell did you let it go as far as it did. If you weren't going to be committed then you should have pulled away the moment I kissed you!" I yelled.

Edward stayed silent, I sighed and went for the door, "Forget it."

"Bella!" He shouted.

I turned around, "What?"

"Please don't make this any harder than it has to be."

I laughed bitterly, "How could it get any fucking harder? Do you just expect me to walk out that door and forget all about it? Well I can't! I'm not like thay! I can't do it! I can't be cold hearted like you---- "

"DON'T YOU DARE SAY THAT!" he yelled.

I froze this was the first time Edward had ever yelled at me, I glared, "SAY WHAT? THAT YOU COULD CARELESS ABOUT ME? WELL THAT'S THE FUCKING TRUTH!! IF YOU CARED EVEN ONE OUNCE ABOUT MY FEELINGS YOU WOULD HAVE STOPPED THE KISS!"

"DO CARE BELLA, BUT IT WOULD JUST BE TOO COMPLICATED! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT ME TO DO?! "

"I WANT YOU TO CHOOSE!" I yelled.

Edward froze, there was a moment of silence.

I took a deep breath, "What's it going to be Edward? Me? Or your reputation?"

Edward sent me a death glare, I didn't like where this was going, he was too anger driven, this was not the Edward I knew, He took a deep breath, "I think it would be better for the both of us if you and I weren't friends. I don't want you talking to me, and I want you to go home." He said in a much calmer voice.

I made my face become impassive as I tried to stop the waterworks from falling. "Fine."

I grabbed my jacket, "Bella..." He said soothingly.

"Don't."

I closed my eyes, "Don't fucking give me this shit!" I whispered as a tear ran down my face.

"I'm trying to make things as simple as possible---"

"Oh please! The only thing your doing is making things much more complicated."

He clenched his teeth, "The thing I'm trying to do is fix the FUCKING MISTAKE YOU DID WHEN YOU IDIOTICALLY KISSED ME!"

I narrowed my eyes, "IF IT WAS SUCH A FUCKING MISTAKE THEN WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU STOP?" I yelled, I was now crying and I could feel my voice getting hoarse.

He was silent, and I shook my head, "I can't do this, you're right, it was a mistake, all of it. I should have known."

Edward sighed and placed his hand on my shoulder as if to soothe me, but his touch felt like poison.

"Bella---"

"FOR FUCKING SAKES, DON'T BELLA ME, DON'T TOUCH ME, DON'T LOOK AT ME AND DON'T TALK TO ME...EVER! I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN BETTER THAN TO HAVE EVER HAVE GOTTEN MIXED UP WITH YOU, THEN THIS WOULD HAVE NEVER OF HAPPENED...YOU FUCKING PLAYERS ARE ALL THE SAME! YOU ALWAYS DO THIS TO ME....YOUR JUST LIKE **HIM**!" I screamed and ran out the house.

As soon as I got home a went to my room, but I didn't cry. I was about to, but when I came through the door I saw a note with my name on it. I slowly opened it and started shaking violently when I read what it said.

_Dear Bella,_

_I can't wait to see you again._

_With love, Your dearest boyfriend._

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**Thanks for sticking with me while I wrote this ridiculously long chapter. It was such a pain in the ass. I had written it once before and then my computer crashed and that was like the day from hell! My whole chapter got deleted.**

**Don't worry about Bella and Edward, they will get together...eventually. Also, how did I do on the kissing scene? Was it good? Anyway please R&R!**

**Thanks!**

**Blink182lover4life.**


	7. Over it, over you

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor will I ever own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Or Breaking Dawn. They all belong to the wonderful author Stephanie Meyer. Any of the songs you see are NOT written by me, they all belong to their respectable owners. No copyright infringement intended.

Pairings: Eddie/Bella, Alice/Jazzy, Emmy/Rose, Carlisle/Esme, Jacob/Angela, and Victoria/James.

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I didn't yell, I didn't do anything.

In fact, I couldn't feel anything, I was numb, so incredibly numb.

He was here, in my house...in my room. I just sat on my bed and stared at the ceiling.

When Victoria, James, and Laurent came home, I didn't come out, I didn't eat, and I didn't go to school the next day. I repeated the same procedure the next day as well.

I didn't go anywhere, not to the club, to school, to eat, no where. Victoria had to bring me my food, but I'd only eat one thing she brought, not even enough to fill the hunger.

Just enough so I knew that I wouldn't die.

I continued doing this for three more days, I was too wrapped up in my own fear to worry about anything else.

He was coming, the guy I tried so hard to get away from, he was coming to get me.

I knew that I was hurting the others, but I couldn't feel guilty. I knew they were worried, but I just didn't care. I couldn't.

They didn't bother coming to soothe me anymore from my nightmares, even though I would wake up screaming I would just stop the second I woke up. I actually had to yell at them and tell them not to come anymore.

The less time they spent with me, the better, right? I tried to distance myself from any other emotion. I actually looked forward to having the nightmares now, that was the only time I could feel anything...even if it was only fear.

I'd been like this once before, the day after the rape. I was so depressed that Victoria sent me to live with Charlie. She just couldn't bare to look at me like that. I could tell she was about to crack any day now.

"Bella! if you don't come back to normal within the next 24 hours I'm sending you to live with Charlie!" Victoria yelled, she was crying, my face was still as blank as ever.

"Then I should start packing." I said and got up to get my bags.

I heard them all gasp. Alice, Emmett, Jasper and Rose were here too.

"No Bella please! Go back to being normal, we don't want you to move!" Cried Alice, I stared at her, she and Rose were crying too.

I'd been waiting for this day, it had been exactly two weeks since I became like this. Victoria had tried everything, from yelling at me to begging Alice and the others to come, to threatening me. But I still didn't feel anything, nothing at all. I knew I had to do something though, I was worrying everyone I cared about.

But, better have them worry than hang with them and get them killed.

"Bella, listen to me." Said Rose as she sat down on the bed, I looked at her, "Bella, if you don't get better, your going to die. You haven't eaten hardly anything in weeks. Your too thin, you need strength Bells. We don't want you to die, think about everyone that you'd be hurting. Don't you care about us?" she whispered, I sighed and didn't say anything.

The truth was I wasn't sure what to do. "Bella?" asked Rose, she was still waiting for my answer, I took a deep breath, "I'll go to school tomorrow." I said, but I didn't have any emotion in my voice. Still, it was progress and they all jumped for joy.

The next day came faster than I wanted it too.

I woke up early and wobbled as I tried to find the strength to get up. Rose was right, I had become a mess.

I slowly made my way into the kitchen, Laurent already had breakfast made, today I ate more, more than I had in two weeks. Then I took a shower and got dressed for school.

I looked in the mirror, Rose was right again, I was to thin. All of my stuff had become loose and I now had to wear my pants with a belt. I was also very pale, way to pale to pass as a living human.

I went out to the front of my house and saw that Alice was already waiting for me. I climbed in the front seat, Alice looked at me concerned, "How are you feeling?" she asked, "Oh I feel great." I replied sarcastically.

She sighed and drove us to school. I went to Trig with Rose and everyone stared at me, including Mr. Varner.

"Well, glad you could clear your schedule long enough to remember to come back to school Ms. Swan." Snapped Mr. Varner, I just sat down and ignored him. Trig went by quickly, no one bothered me, so I was thankful for that.

English went by fast as well, Jasper was asking me how I felt every five minutes so it became a little annoying. But that was good right? At least I was starting to feel again.

History was probably the most aggravating.

Alice kept looking at me every two minutes, asking me how I felt every five minutes, and kept helping me do stuff every eight minutes.

"Dammit Alice just leave me the fuck alone! I'm sick, not an incompetent idiot!" I yelled after History. "Sorry, I'm just worried." she mumbled.

"Well then don't be worried! It's annoying!" She looked at me hurt and before I could say sorry she glared at me, "What happened to you? When did you get so cold?" she nearly yelled as she walked ahead of me towards Jasper.

I was kind of glad to be alone now, to have some peace of mind without someone butting in every twenty seconds. I sighed as I wobbled a bit. I quickly grabbed the rail. I slid down against the wall leading down the stares. I could feel my whole body shaking as I just sat there.

Why was I so depressed? Oh yeah, my ex boyfriend is coming to kill me. How could I forget....

I thought of Edward, he was definitely not talking to me, I'd only seen him once this morning, he walked right passed me.

It hurt, to be ignored, but then again I didn't smile, or wave to him either. I winced as a picture of Edward's beautiful face fell into my head, and against my better judgement, I skipped lunch and hid in the bathroom.

I then decided that skipping lunch was a very bad idea and forced myself to walk into the lunch room.

I saw Alice and silently walked to the table. When I sat down everyone was silent. I looked around, skipping Edward's face who was probably the most concerned.

"What?" I snapped, nobody said anything and just kept staring at me.

"For fucking sakes, what the hell are you staring at?" I asked, Emmett cleared his throat, I snapped my eyes to meet his horrified expression, "What?" I asked for the third time. He sighed, "You look so, pale." He whispered.

I closed my eyes, "Well, you try going through what I've had to go though for the past two weeks and lets see how freaking healthy you look."

Emmett sighed again, "What happened to you Bella?"

I looked down, immediately feeling guilty, "I don't really know." I whispered, then I got up and slowly walked out.

I was just out the doors when I started to stumble a little bit more, my vision started getting hazy and I could feel the horrible lurching in my stomach. I fell to the ground and started panting trying to breath.

I immediately felt somebody flip me over, "Go get help!" They shouted, "Right!" the other replied.

"Bella! What's wrong? Can you breathe?" Asked a panicky voice, it was a high soprano voice, Alice no doubt.

I started panting harder, "I-----can't-----breathe!" I panted as someone lifted me up, "I'll call 911!" Said Alice, "No, there's no time for that, I'll have to drive her!." Shouted a panicked velvet voice.

"Edward." I mumbled as I slipped into unconsciousness.

When I woke up I saw a bright light shining down on me. I was breathing normal, and I could hear a heart mo niter. I opened my eyes all the way, and found myself lying on a hospital bed. I was covered in IV tubes.

I tried to sit up but realized that was impossible, I was about to get up when I heard voices out the front door.

"She had a panic attack, but the panic attack came from starvation. Has she been eating at all?" asked a feminine voice.

"She's been eating but very little proportions. Today, though, she ate a whole plates worth. She's been in this depression state for the past two weeks, today she was just starting to recover from it. She actually went back to school today." Said another girl, I presumed her to be Victoria.

"Hmmm, she may have just over exerted herself, her body probably couldn't take the physical motions because of the lack of nutrition and physical movement in almost two weeks....and it says here that she's been in this kind of depression before?" Asked the doctor.

"Yes, exactly one year ago, we don't know what caused the sudden depression, but it took her six months to snap out of it." There was a moments silence as I listened intently from my bed, "Did she have a panic attack before?" asked the doctor, "Yes, only not as bad, she also went to therapy for about two months." Said Victoria.

All of a sudden the door knob started to turn, I laid back down quickly and pretended to be asleep.

"Do you know when she'll wake up?" asked Victoria, "It should be within the hour." replied the doctor.

"Thank you."

I heard the door close. I heard Victoria scoot a chair up next to my bed. I then pretended to 'wake up'.

"Bella! Your awake!" She yelled and hugged me, I smiled, "Yeah, and your crushing me to death!" I choked. She let go as tears started to fall from her eyes, "Don't you ever scare me like that again!"

I nodded, "I'm sorry," I said as she held my hand, "It's okay, the doctor says that the panic attack wasn't the worst of it's kind..." I shook my head, "I'm sorry for everything...including the depression." Victoria smiled, then frowned, "Yeah, mind telling me what that was about?" I sighed, "I got a letter...from my ex...he's..._visiting_." I replied, I narrowed my eyes as I thought of him.

Victoria's eyes got wide, I started shaking, "I hate him." I whispered, and I started to cry. Victoria held me in her arms and I cried harder, "I hate him, I hate him, I hate him." I kept repeating. Victoria just soothed me into an uneasy sleep.

I woke up later to find that I was not alone, Emmett, Jasper, Alice, Rose, Esme, Carlisle, James, Laurent, and Victoria were all here.

I smiled, "Hey guys." I croaked.

"BELLA!" screamed Alice and Rose as I was mauled by there hugs. I laughed as I hugged them back.

"Okay girls, she needs to breathe sometime." Said Carlisle, they let me go and I shook his hand, "How are you feeling Bella?" he asked. I smiled, "I'm fine, could be better, but I'll manage." He laughed.

I then assured Esme that I was fine before I moved on to James, "Hiya James." I said with a smile, James smiled, "Hey Bella. I'm glad your okay...you scared me for a moment, actually, you scared all of us." I smiled sadly, "I'm sorry about that." He chuckled, "You're okay and that's all that matters." I hugged him and then hugged Laurent. Soon, Victoria, Carlisle, Esme, James, and Laurent all left.

I looked back at my friends, if I could even call them that anymore. "Emmett, Alice, I'm so sorry about what I said, that wasn't me and-----"

"We don't want your apology." Cut Emmett.

I stared at him wide eyed, "But I feel so terrible for what I said. I want to make it up to you."

Emmett smiled, "You want to make it up to us? Then get well." He said and kissed my forehead.

I smiled, Jasper came up next, "I hope you get better Bells...It's not going to be the same with out you there at school....Me, Emmett and the rest of the gang look forward to having you back."

I gave them toothy grin as I hugged them all and watched them leave.

It was while I was musing to myself that I realized something, where was Edward? I sighed, he probably didn't care.

I then thought about other things, more important things, like...what was I going to do about my ex? I definitely knew he was in town, but what was I going to do about my friends? They should be safe, I kept to my bargain. I haven't told anyone, so he should spare them, but what if he didn't? What if he killed them, just for fun? I already tried distancing myself away from them, and that just sent me spiraling into depression.

I sighed, I didn't know what to do.

Either way, I was putting the people I love in pain.

I took a deep breath and cried.

That night I woke up screaming, it was another nightmare, it was the scariest one yet.

I muffled my screams and wiped away my tears, but they wouldn't stop falling. Just the thought of knowing that he was in town, knowing that he was watching me, it made me sick.

I wanted to puke, I got up from my bed and actually did puke, it was horrible. I quickly brushed my teeth and went back to bed, I didn't go back to sleep though, as much as I wanted to, I was still so scared.

I took a deep breath and pictured Edward beside me, holding me and telling me that everything was going to be okay.

It worked, not as good as the real thing, but it worked. I was soon drifting off again, and I was that much calmer than before.

I couldn't help but be calmed when I thought about him, I missed him...a lot.

I tried to think about happier times with Edward, but the only memory that I could see when I closed my eyes, was when Edward and I had kissed.

Then it immediately became the memory from hell as it turned into our fight. Our very last words to each other.

I sighed as I remembered the pained expression on his face as I slammed the door. He wouldn't believe how many times I had relived and replayed that memory through my head when I was in my room. All the hours that would go by and I'd just think about him and my last words.

I actually compared him to my ex. Stupid me, that was pretty much a slap in the face...actually a slap would probably have been less painful.

I felt so guilty now, as much as I had thought about Edward hurting me when I first met him, I couldn't think of him ever laying a hand on me now. He was nothing like my ex, nothing at all. Edward was a gentleman...well, as gentleman as a player can get, he would never hurt me...well not physically...I keep forgetting the huge cut my heart received when he chose his stupid reputation over me. I took a deep breath and just laid there for the rest of the night.

The hospital kept me there until I was healthy again.

I was now the size I was before the depression and I also had my healthy pale-ish glow back.

It was now my first day back to school, and I was positive that this day would go better than my last.

I let Alice drive me to school, she was still a little scared about me but thankfully less annoying.

We arrived at school early and just decided to wait for everyone to get here before we went in. "So, when is your next show at the club?" Asked Alice, I shrugged, "I don't know, I was kind of hoping to write some more songs..."

Alice nodded in understanding, "I think I might go back tonight...just to let them know I'm not dead and that I haven't forgotten about them."

Alice's face lit up, "That's great, I'll tell everyone to be there." I smiled, then I frowned, "Hey Alice?" I asked, she turned her head and waited for me to finish the question, I shifted nervously. "Um...I was wondering where Edward was...the day I woke up."

Alice frowned, "He wasn't there...he left the moment he heard that you were going to be okay."

I perked up, well at least he cared about my well being, "Then why'd he leave?" I asked, she frowned deeper, "He said he had somewhere to go, someplace important...he looked really jumpy, I think you scared him. I've never seen Edward so panicky before...especially at school when he found you passed out. "

She shivered at that thought, "You scared us all that day, we thought you were dead." I took a deep breath, "I won't let that happen again, I'm sorry." She smiled and nuzzled the top of my head, "The good news is that your not dead and that your fine and out of depression, and that's all that matters." She said as she gave me a light hug.

That's when a silver Volvo, BMW, a Jacked up Hummer, and a Lamborghini (Which was Jazzie's) pulled up beside Alice's yellow Porsche.

We all climbed out and I, who was avoiding all physical and eye contact with Edward as humanly possible, suddenly tripped.

A million hands went out to catch me, but as usual, luck wasn't on my side and I was somehow miraculously caught by Edward.

I stared up at him and on reflex, and reflex alone, jumped out of his arms. As soon as I found my balance again I saved Edward the trouble of talking and stalked off.

"Bella, wait up!" called Alice and Rose. I turned back and smiled, "Sorry guys, I just realized that I was late for trig." I apologized, Rose and Alice started laughing, "No worries." and with that Alice departed to go to class, while Rose and I went to ours.

"Trig was, in one word, HARD!! So, so fucking hard. Mr. Varner, being the asshole that he is, gave me triple homework and a weeks worth of detention!" I said as I sat down at lunch, everyone looked at me wide eyed, except Rose. She looked just as pissed as I did.

"That's not all." I said, there eyes became wider, "He made me partners with Lauren Mallory!"

Their mouths dropped, I huffed as I started shoving food angrily in my mouth.

"SWAN!"

I heard a high pitched nasal scream, I rolled my eyes, "God, not now...there are too many witnesses." I said as I looked up at the ceiling, Emmett chuckled, "We won't tell...in fact if you want, I can bury her."

I grinned, then I turned around to face the whore behind me, "What the fuck do you want?" I snapped, Lauren raised her eyebrow, "I just wan't you to know, that I will NOT be participating on our project. And if you don't do it, we'll get in F." she said smugly.

_She is so stupid._ I thought I frowned, "Well then slap that big, red, fat F on there, cause there's no fucking way I'm sharing the credit for something that I did **by** **myself**...now if you please, I'm eating, and looking at your fugly raccoon eyed face isn't helping my appetite."

She looked at me horrified, "I'll show you fugly, you BITCH!" She screamed as she took spaghetti and through it at me.

Damn, for a whore with no brain she sure does have a good arm. I ducked and through a sandwich at her. It hit her square in the face, I laughed as she started throwing a hissy fit.

I stared back at the others who cracked up with laughter too. I glanced at Edward who was just looking at me with a shocked/amused face, trying to hide the smile that crept up on him.

I glanced back at Lauren who was now beet red, "I'LL KILL YOU!" She screamed and ran at me. She through a punch and I ducked and socked her in the stomach. She pushed both me and her on the floor. We rolled around and pulled each others hair, she actually had the nerve to slap me.

I punched her, she cried and yanked my hair once more. I yanked her's back as she screamed that annoying stupid scream. I was totally pissed off today, and she wasn't helping. I rolled on top of her and she slapped me once more, I growled and slapped her back harder. She gritted her teeth.

"I hope you get fucking raped you whore!" She screamed, at that I froze, and a new anger overflowed through me and I punched Lauren with every ounce of energy I had. She wailed in pain as it made contact with her cheek, "I HATE YOU!" I screamed, I totally beat the shit out of her.

Finally I felt somebody pull me off of Lauren, "Calm down Tiger, it's over, You'll get in trouble." Someone whispered in my ear. It was Emmett, I fought him back with everything I had. I struggled to get away from Emmett, but he was just to strong. So I stepped on his foot and for once I thanked Alice for making me where heels.

I think I accidentally broke his toe. I then ran and pounced on Lauren again.

"Dammit, I didn't know she'd do that!" I heard Emmett growl as he hopped back over to me. I gave him a warning glare to back off, which he did. I looked to Jasper, expecting him to come and get me next, he just looked at me and then back at Emmett, smiled, then shook his head.

Smart boy.

I smiled triumphantly. That is, until another pair of arms wrapped around me, I struggled to get out of the stone hard grasp, "That's enough Swan, you don't want to kill her." Said a musical voice.

I almost stopped trying to struggle...almost.

"Get the fuck away from me Cullen, I want her dead!" I snapped, he tightened his grip as I struggled harder, "No you don't, your upset, let it go. I'm sure you've made her very sorry for what she said...and if she was conscious right now, I'm sure she'd immediately take back her words."

I stopped struggling for a second to stare at Lauren, she was unconcious?

I looked at the unmoving form of the girl, holy shit she _was _unconscious.

"Holy Shit!" I whispered as I now relaxed in his grip. He chuckled, "You have quite the temper don't you?"

I frowned, "Whatever." I mumbled. He let go and I walked over to Lauren, Edward followed me just to make sure I didn't go all phsyco again. I quickly slung Lauren's arm over my shoulder and, with a lot of help from Edward, lifted her up. I turned back to the now quiet cafeteria, "I'm taking Lauren to the nurse, you guys keep on eating, I'll be back in a second." I said and turned around and walked with Lauren and Edward.

Edward and I walked in silence, I could feel the awkward tension in the air.

He cleared his throat, "Take a left." He mumbled, I did as he asked, still not talking to him.

We arrived at the nurses office, "Oh my!" She yelped in surprise as we laid Lauren down. "My dear, what happened?" she asked as she examined her, "Um, cat-fight." I mumbled. Edward chuckled, I elbowed him in the side.

"Will she be okay?" I asked innocently, I was actually hoping her nose was broken or something.

"She'll be just fine Dear." Said the nurse as she patted me on the shoulder. "Great." I muttered sarcastically, though the nurse didn't hear. "Are you a friend of her's dear?" asked the nurse as she bandaged Lauren up. I forced a smile, "Well, ma'am, not really." I said in an innocently sweet voice.

Edward laughed, I, again, elbowed him in the side. The nurse turned around, "Well dear, you can leave then, I don't want you to have to miss lunch because of this, she'll be alright."

I smiled politely and started walking. The moment I was out of the office I immediately started cussing, "Shit, Why couldn't her fucking ass nose be broken or something?" I mumbled as Edward and I walked back to the cafeteria. Edward was laughing his head off now, "You are a such a liar Bella Swan." He said through little fits of laughter, I stared at him, eyes wide, "I'm serious, I wanted her to come to school tomorrow with her fucking nose crashed right on the side of her face!"

Edward rolled his eyes. "Whatever." He chuckled and we made our way back to the lunch table.

Emmett glared at me, I smiled apologetically, "Sorry Emmett, I wasn't in control of my actions...I was mad." Emmett smiled, "Naw, it's nothing...my toe hurts like hell though." I grimaced, "I didn't break it, did I?"

Emmett laughed and shook his head, I sighed in relief. Then panic started to enter my system, "Um, Guys? Am I in deep trouble?"

Rose smiled, "Well, if this wasn't Lauren Mallory, then yes. You would be in some totally deep shit. But since pretty much the whole school hates her, we managed to convince most of them to say that it was Jessica Stanley that beat her up. The only people who disagreed with our plan were Lauren's whore followers." I smiled, as underhanded and as sneaky as that was, I couldn't help but be thrilled.

I was still really pissed at Lauren, she just didn't know how literally I took her words.

Biology was next, I sat down next to Edward who looked more animated than usual.

He was still keeping his distance from me and as usual I didn't talk to him. That's what he wanted so that's what I was going to give him.

I owed him that much. I forced myself to smile politely as did he. Mr. Banner walked in the class shortly afterwards. "Students take your seats!" He ordered gently as he looked at me.

He smiled politely, "Welcome back dear." He greeted, I smiled back warmly, "Thank you Mr. Banner." I said politely.

I looked past Mr. Banner and saw Jessica and Katie glaring evilly at me. I raised my eyebrow and then death glared them right back, they immediately backed off.

'_Ha!'_I thought as I smiled victoriously. I then turned my attention back to Mr. Banner, "Today class we are going to start our next lesson. You will read pgs. 456-470 on Mendel's Theory, then talk to your partners on the continuity and inheritances an infant may have when born. Then we will talk about the genetic traits in humans. After this lesson I expect a nicely worded four paged essay on this subject. That is all." He said with a smile.

I sighed as I opened the text book and started reading. I was halfway asleep and bored out of my mind when I finally reached the last page of the book. "Thank God." I muttered as I closed it. Edward's head snapped up, "What happened?" I stifled a laugh, he looked like he had just woken up.

"Oh, your done now?" he asked, I looked at him, his book was already closed and sitting neatly on his desk, "H-How did you read that so fast?" I asked, he shrugged, "I wanted to get done." was all he said, I just rolled my eyes.

After Biology, Edward and I made our way toward music, "Oh Joy! Welcome back Ms. Swan!" Said the teacher as he jumped for joy. I had particularly, besides Edward, become one of his most favorite students.

I smiled and gave him a hug, "It's good to be back Mr. Snike." I said as I sat down. Mr. Snike smiled warmly at me, "All right, lets begin. As you know Ms. Swan was out of school for quite a while so I gave her and her partner an extension on there music assignment."

Mr. Snike looked at me, "Don't worry Dear, your song isn't do until the end of March." I smiled and glanced at Edward. He was staring at me, he then slowly looked away, as did I.

"Now let's get started with Ms. Stanley." I swirled my head around to meet Jessica's cold stare and smug grin. I rolled my eyes and looked out the window. "Now Ms. Stanley, I understand that you also needed an exception on your song...you were a..._sick?_" asked Mr. Snike skeptically. Jessica, who was as brainless as Lauren, smiled, "Yes!" She said excitedly. The teacher sighed, "Well then, please begin."

Hearing Jessica sing was like scratching nails on a chalk board. The whole class-----even Mr. Snike had to cover there ears. "Thank you! Jessica. That's enough!" Yelled Mr. Snike yelled halfway through the song, as he tried to regain his composure.

Jessica smiled and walked back to her desk. I slowly let my hands fall into my lap once more. _Note to self: never let brainless bimbos sing a sappy heartbreak song._ I thought as I stared out the window again.

After music was Gym then Spanish. After that, I went to serve my detention for Mr. Varner...luckily Rose and Alice bailed me out with help from the principle. Soon school was over and Alice drove me home.

"Thanks Alice." I said as I climbed out of her car. I ran up the stairs and in to my room. I decided to clean the house up a little, I did the laundry, then the kitchen, then the bedrooms and so on.

After the house was clean I went into the music room. I hadn't been down there since Edward and I tried to do a love song. I laughed at that memor, we had spent hours down here just trying to think of it, and we just ended up with nothing. I smiled as my hands traced the piano keys. I started playing a tune, it was kind of catchy. Getting into the song I started singing words that just popped in my head.

_I always needed time on my own,_

_I never thought I'd, need you there when I cried._

_And the days feel like years, when I'm alone._

_And the bed where you lie, is made up on your side._

_When you walk away, I count the steps that you take._

_Do you see how much I need you right now?_

_When your gone, the pieces of my heart, are missing you._

_When your gone, the face I came to know, is missing too._

_When your gone, the words I need to hear, to always get me through the day._

_And make it okay, I miss you._

_(When you're gone by Avril Lavigne)_

I stopped playing and immediatly wrote down the song.

I was going to play it for the club tonight...now I just had to get my band to memorize the song...

okay, so I'll play it tomorrow night.

The door bell started to ring, I jumped up and ran for the door. I was about to answer it, then I hesitated.

What if it was Him? I looked around, there were no witnesses...I sighed and shook my head free from those thoughts. I was getting paranoid.

Then again, I had a good reason to be.

I quickly closed my eyes and opened the door.

"Bella?"

I snapped my eyes opened, "Edward?" I said surprised, he nodded. I opened the door further, "Were you expecting an unwelcome guest?" he asked as I started to unlock all the locks.

"Kind of," I said. He raised his eyebrow, "May I ask who?"

I sighed, "My ex is in town...I don't want him here." I said, Edward raised his eyebrows. I quickly tried to trail away from that subject.

"Why are you here?" I asked, he looked to the ground, "Alice made me come down here to see if you were okay...Victoria also called and asked for the same thing."

I scowled, "My God! two weeks worth of depression and one panic attack and all of a sudden I'm too fragile to do anything!" I ranted as I walked away from the door. I circled back around and came back to it when I realized Edward wasn't coming in. "Well, I'm fine, obviously, so you can go if you want." Edward nodded and then turned back around, " Victoria also wanted me to ask you if _He_ came by."

I frowned, "If you see her again, tell her no. But I'd count on him coming tomorrow." Edward frowned and I could tell he didn't like the thought of my ex being here.

Then he smiled, "Oh and Victoria also heard about the fight you were in at school today...she told me to tell you that you are in some deep trouble." I groaned, "How the hell did she find this out? As far as Alice and I were concerned, Jessica did it!" Edward chuckled, "Don't ask me...but I would seriously consider sucking up to them. She sounded pretty pissed." I frowned as Edward turned around again to leave. I sighed and shut my door.

This was going to be a long night.

"I'm home!" shouted Victoria as she busted through the door.

I frowned, "Hey guys." I mumbled. Victoria scowled at me, "So what was the fight about in school? You didn't start it did you?"

My frown deepened, "No I didn't, Lauren Mallory did, she started talking a whole bunch of crap and it just really pissed me off!" I said defensively.

James raised an eyebrow, "The same Lauren Mallory who's in your Trig class?" I nodded. Laurent sighed and patted me on my back, "Well she had a good reason...obviously this Lauren chick was giving her a hard time and finally got what she deserved."

I smiled, I could always count on Laurent to back me up. I mouthed a thank you to him as Victoria rolled her eyes. "Just make sure it won't happen again." I nodded once more and then started to cook dinner.

"So are we going to the club tonight?" I asked, James shrugged, "If your up to it...a little heads up though, it's a duet night...meaning that you'll have to sing with another band." I pursed my lips, "Well, I'm up for it...how many songs do I get to sing with the other band?"

Victoria raised up two fingers, I nodded, "Well that works out perfectly, I sing a song with there band, they sing a song with us." James considered that..."I'm game. What about you guys?" James and I looked at Victoria and Laurent. They nodded, I smiled, "Alright!" I squealed as I cut off the stove and served dinner.

After dinner I grabbed my new Ibanez Guitar that I got for Christmas...compliments to Edward and then I called Alice to tell her I was going.

When we arrived at the club I saw the other band and walked over to them, "Hi, I'm the lead singer...of the official band here at the club, I understand that we're doing a duet together, do you have any problems with that?" I asked, the guy turned around and smiled.

He was pretty cute, he had short blonde hair, and tanned skin with deep Sapphire blue eyes. He wore a black Metallica shirt and blue jeans. His left ear was pierced and he wore a Stratocaster Guitar.

Scratch that, he was a total hottie!

"Nope, No problem there cutie." He said, I smiled back politely, "Great, I look forward to it then." I said and then winked.

I watched his eyes travel to my new guitar, "That's the brand new Ibanez!" he nearly yelled, I blushed, "Yep." He looked at me with puppy dog eyes, "Can I play it real quick?"

I laughed, "Sure." I took it off and handed it to him. He looked at it for a second, "It's autographed too? Simple Plan...and Blink 182?"

I nodded. He started strumming, "Wow, your really good." I said, he smiled, "Thanks...I've heard you play in here a couple times...your not so bad yourself." I flashed him a toothy grin, "Thanks."

He handed me back my Ibanez. We practiced each others songs until we could memorize them and then we did an extra song for fun. I let him play my guitar one more time as I was called on stage.

"By the way, I never caught your name." He said.

I smiled, "It's Bella, Bella Swan." He held out his hand and smiled, "Josh Hollowman." I shook his hand and he winked as I ran on stage. "I wrote this song a while back...it was when I first moved here...it's called Everywhere." I said as I started to pick my guitar. To tell you the truth it was just after the night I dreamed about Edward...so obviously the song is about him.

_Turn it inside out so I can see._

_The part of you that's drifting over me._

_When I wake your, your never there._

_And when I sleep your, your everywhere,_

_Your everywhere._

_Just tell me how I got this far._

_Just tell why your here and who you are._

_Cause everytime I look, your never there._

_And everytime I sleep, your always there._

_Cause your everywhere to me._

_And when I close my eyes, it's you I see._

_Your everything I know that makes me believe._

_I'm not alone, I'm not alone._

_(Everywhere by Michelle Branch)_

"Thank you, and now I turn the stage over to a new band!" I said as I walked off stage. I listened to the others play. They were good, Josh had an amazing talent. They had sung a song called Let it happen (By Jimmy Eat world)

After they were finished I looked at the clock, they were right on schedule, they played for almost two hours.

I let Josh introduce me, "Hi, alright, this lady and her band just came on a little bit earlier tonight and did some of her great songs, and um, I was really thrilled when she asked to do one of my songs with her and here you are, welcome back Bella Swan!"

I smiled as I walked on stage,

**Bella**

_And I'd give up forever to touch you._

_Cause I know that you feel me somehow._

_You're the closest to heaven, that I'll ever be,_

_And I don't want to go home right now._

_And all I can taste is this moment,_

_And all I can breathe is your life._

_And sooner, or later it's over._

_I just don't want to miss you tonight._

_And I don't want the world to see me._

_Cause I don't think that they'd understand._

_When everything's made to be broken._

_I just want you to know who I am._

_­_**Josh**

_And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming._

_Or the moment of truth in your lies._

_When everything feels like the movies,_

**Bella and Josh**

_Yeah, you bleed just to know your alive._

_And I don't want the world to see me._

_Cause I don't think that they'd understand._

_When everything's made to be broken,_

_I just want you to know who I am._

_(Break/solo)_

_And I don't want the world to see me._

_Cause I don't think that they'd understand._

_When everything's made to be broken,_

_I just want you to know who I am._

_And I don't want the world to see me._

_Cause I don't think that they'd understand._

_When everything's made to be broken,_

_I just want you to know who I am._

_I just want you to know who I am,_

_I just want you to know who I am,_

_I just want you to know who I am._

_(Iris by the Goo goo dolls and Avril Lavigne)_

After that song we waited as we let the crowd simmer down before we began again. "Thank you!" Yelled Josh as he came over to me and shook my hand, I smiled and winked. Then I turned back to the crowd, "Our next song will be from my choosing...as you know, the song that Josh and I just performed was his...and for those of you who don't know the name, it's Iris. Now, for my song, it will be a song that I wrote. It's called Last Night." I said as I walked over to the piano, I looked over the crowed again and saw Alice wave to me and give me a thumbs up. I smiled and rolled my eyes, she was so funny sometimes. I started to play.

**Josh**

_You come to me with scars on your wrist,_

_You tell me this will be the last night, feeling like this._

**Bella**

_I just came to say goodbye,_

_Didn't want you to see me cry, I'm fine._

**Bella and Josh**

_But I know it's a lie!_

_This is the last night you'll spend alone,_

_Look me in the eyes so I know, you know._

_I'm everywhere you want me to be._

_The last night you'll spend alone,_

_I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go._

_I'm everything, you need me to be._

**Josh**

_Your parents say everything is your fault,_

_But they don't know you like I know you,_

_They don't know you at all._

**Bella**

_I'm so sick of when they say,_

_It's just a phase you'll be okay, your fine._

_But I know it's a lie!_

**Bella and Josh**

_This this the last night you'll spend alone,_

_Look me in the eyes so I know you know._

_I'm everywhere, you want me to be._

_The last night you'll spend alone,_

_I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go._

_I'm everything, you need me to be._

_Last night away from me._

**Josh**

_The night is so long, when everything's gone wrong._

_If you give me your hand I will help you hold on._

_Tonight._

**Bella**

_Tonight_

**Bella and Josh**

_This is the last night night you'll spend alone._

_Look me in the eyes, so I know, you know._

_I'm everywhere, you want me to be._

_The last night you'll spend alone,_

_I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go._

_I'm everything, you need me to be._

**Bella**

_I won't let you say goodbye,_

_And I'll be your reason why._

**Bella and Josh**

_Last night, away from me_

_Away from me._

_(Last Night by Skillet.__)_

After that I looked over at Josh, tonight had been a long, long night.

I think it was actually one in the morning now. I smiled as I walked over to him, I turned toward the audience, "Thank you! Give it up for Josh and his band!"

I looked back at Josh and we gave each other a hug. "Thank you!" I said one more time and walked off stage.

I was halfway to the car when Josh pulled me aside, "Hey, great show." he said as he shook my hand, "Thanks, you too."

He chuckled, "So I was thinking..." He trailed, I cocked my eyebrow curiously, "Maybe, this Saturday...wanna go out?" he said, I smiled and was about to let him down gently...but then I thought about it...why couldn't I go out?

Just because Edward was...wait, why was I thinking about Edward? He had his chance and he chose the other way out, I smiled.

"Yes. I'd love too." I said and got in my car. He smiled, "Great, pick you up around eight." I nodded and wrote down the directions to my house. "I'll be waiting." I said with a wink and drove off.

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**Hope you guys liked this long overdue chapter...I was going to update sooner but Fan fiction wouldn't let me in the login area. Sorry! Also, I know the beginning was kind of depressing...but I needed it to be so you guys could get a sense what what Bella's going through. **

**Please read and Review! **

**xoxoxo**

**Blink182lover4life**


	8. When it all falls apart

**Disclaimer:** I do not own, nor will I ever own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Or Breaking Dawn. They all belong to the wonderful author Stephanie Meyer. Any of the songs you see are NOT written by me, they all belong to their respectable owners. No copyright infringement intended.

**Pairings:**Eddie/Bella, Alice/Jazzy, Emmy/Rose, Carlisle/Esme, Jacob/Angela, and Victoria/James.

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The next day I was rudely awaken by Laurent's alarm clock. I groaned as I put the pillow over my head.

"LAURENT SHUT THAT DAMN THING UP!" I heard Victoria yell. I guess Laurent was still asleep because it was still busting my eardrums, "Dammit!" I mumbled as I pushed the pillow harder against my ears.

"LAURENT!!!!" Yelled James and Victoria, there was still no sign that Laurent had heard them, I sighed and flung the covers off of myself. I stomped my way into Laurent's room, only to find that he wasn't there. I growled as I turned it off.

"THANK YOU BELLA!" yelled Victoria as she shut her bedroom door. I nodded and went back to my own bed. Last night was the second night that I had no nightmares...it was odd, very, very odd. All I thought about was Edward, I was actually starting to feel guilty that I accepted the offer to the date.

I hated it, why should _I_ feel guilty, when _he_ was the one who didn't want it to go any farther? It just wasn't right. Now today I was going to have to deal with him..._this should end well_. I thought sarcastically. One of us is going to end up hurt...and the worst part about it, is that I DON"T want it to be Edward. Shit, this is so fucking messed up. I sighed.

I was about halfway back to dreamland when Laurent busted through my door. "Wake up, you don't want to be late for school do you?" He said ecstatically. I frowned and threw my pillow at him, "You are the ONLY person I know, who likes school. Now go away!" I said as I nestled myself into a comfortable position and tried to go back to sleep.

I peeked one eye open and discovered a frowning Laurent, he narrowed his eyes, "Get. Up." he said challengingly, I raised my eyebrow, "Make. Me." I shot back, he scowled and walked over to me. He lifted me up and walked out of my bedroom, "That's not fair!" I snapped as he threw me on the couch, he started laughing, "Life's not fair." I rolled my eyes and decided to take a shower.

After that I ate quickly and rushed to school, I was pretty late.

I rushed into Trig and sat down beside Rose. "Hey, great job last night!" She whispered as I opened my text book. I smiled, "Thanks."

Rose lifted her eyebrow, "So, that Josh guy...pretty cute huh." I rolled my eyes but couldn't stop the blush, "You guys had some good chemistry last night...did he ask you out?" I blushed deeper, "Maybe." Rose gasped causing Mr. Varner to snap his beady eyes to us, "Hale, Swan, warning number one...pay attention!" He snapped.

I rolled my eyes as he turned back around, "So did you say yes?" she asked, I nodded, she put her hand over her mouth to stop another gasp, "Oh my God, that's great!" she whispered animatedly. I rolled my eyes.

----------

"I'm so frickin tired!" I groaned as I sat down and put my arms and head on the table. Emmett chuckled, "That's fine with me...just as long as you don't go all psycho again." I scowled, "Shut up Emmett. Let me complain!" Alice sat down and pushed a Starbucks coffee in front of my face, "Thanks." I muttered, as I drank it slowly. "Damn Bella, that was some concert last night." She said. I smiled, "Thanks."

I saw her smile, I didn't like it, it was too sneaky, "So...how did everything go with Josh?" I almost choked on my coffee, I glared at Alice as I glanced at Edward, he looked thoroughly digested at the mention of Josh. I guess he knew now. Damn.

"Fine Alice," I said as I continued to eat. Alice giggled, paying no attention to Edward or my mood. "So, I heard he asked you out...and you said yes." I nodded and she squealed, "That's great Bella! So tell me...do you kiss on the first date?" She asked, I flushed and Edward glared at his food, "NO!" I yelled defensively. Alice still paid no attention, "He was really hot, wasn't he?" she asked. I saw Jasper lift up his eyebrow, Alice smiled, "Oh, you know I love you!" She said and kissed him. I rolled my eyes. For the rest of the lunch period, we ate in silence.

"Bella, we have to go!" Said Alice as she shook me, I lifted my head from the table, "Wha?" I said. Emmett was laughing, "We have to go to class, remember school?" I groaned and laid my head back down.

"You guys go, I'll get her to come." said Edward, I snapped my head up. The last thing I wanted was to be left alone with him..."No it's okay, I'll go now, save you the trouble!" I said in forced happiness. But as I got up I tripped. Unfortunately I was caught by Edward, he turned around to the others, "Like I said guys, I'll get her to come...safely I hope."

I sighed as I watched my only escape away from Edward leave. As soon as the others were out the door Edward turned to me, "You don't mind if we're a little late do you?"

"Actually I do min--"

"Didn't think you would." He cut, I scowled.

"Josh Baker...huh?" he said, I sighed, "Yes, Josh Baker." I struggled to get away from Edward but he kept his hands firm on mine, "I don't like it." I glared at him in surprised anger, "No one said you had to!" He glared back, "Josh Baker is one of the biggest players in California." I rolled my eyes, "Oh please Edward, I talked with the guy, he hardly seemed like a player to me...and either way I don't care." I snarled, Edward chuckled bitterly. "Says the girl who has nightmares every night about her ex. You know what happened last time."

He let me go and walked to a kitchen table, I sighed, "It doesn't matter Edward, I don't care weather he's a player or not..." Edward got off the table, "So your going to take a risk...again? With a player?" He asked, "I was going to take a risk on you!" I snapped, he was silent so I continued, "I was going to take a risk on you, but you said no...So now I'm taking a risk on Josh. If you think I'm going to never date because you say so then your wrong!"

He glared, "I never said that!" he retaliated, I looked away from him, "Then you shouldn't care....this isn't any of your business anyway." I snapped.

"I don't give a shit!" he snarled, I scowled, there was a moments silence before I decided to speak again, "How many times, do I have to watch you make out with girls...or know that, that's what your doing when your not at lunch. How many times do I have to listen to girls flirt with you and watch you flirt with them? And besides, weren't you the one who told me to never talk to you again? So I don't see how any of this concerns you. You wanted me out of your life, and that's what you got."

Edward glared, "Don't try to make me the bad guy, I was doing that for the better reason. If you date Josh you'll just end up getting hurt---" I sighed in frustration, "Then let me make that mistake! I'm starting get the feeling that your jealous!" Edward winced, I smirked, "But that _can't_ be it. Or c_an_ it?" I said, Edward sent me a death glare, I gave him one just as mean back. I walked up so close to Edward that I could feel his hot breath on my face, I suddenly wanted to wrap my arms around him and kiss him like I did in the woods but I kept the glare on my face. "Fair warning," I said as he clenched his jaw, "But out Cullen." I snapped and was about to walked out the cafeteria, when he grabbed my hand.

"He's going to hurt you..." Mumbled Edward. I looked into his eyes, for the first time today they weren't full of anger. They were sincere.

I sighed, "No one can hurt me as much as I've already been hurt." I was refurring to the rape, but I guess Edward thought I was talking about him. "I'm sorry." He mumbled. I took a deep breath, "Don't be, you didn't to it to me. _He _did."

I felt Edward's hand on my shoulder, "What did he do Bella?" I felt a tear roll down my face, followed by another and then the shaking of my body. I knew I was collapsing from the stress of my secret. I knew that if I didn't tell anybody, it would slowly gnaw at me from the inside until I just couldn't take it anymore.

So with as much courage as I could, which wasn't a whole lot, I whispered the three words I never thought I'd say out loud.

"I was raped."

I felt Edward freeze as I started crying, it was bittersweet. I was so happy that my secret was out, but I felt as if I had just confined Edward to an impending doom. One which would definitely come after me.

Edward pulled me slowly into a hug and kissed the top of my head. "I'm so sorry, Bella." He kept repeating. I let out a huge sob as I clung to Edward's shirt, "H-his name is M-M-Mike."

I felt my legs give out as both Edward and I fell to the floor. Edward, who fell on his knees, pulled me over to him and rocked me back and fourth. I was just to numb to do anything.

After an hour I was able to get myself together and looked up at Edward, "You can't tell anybody. No one can know about me. Please don't tell..." Edward, at first, looked defiant, like I was an idiot for not telling anyone but after seeing my clumped up hair and tear streaked face, his demeanor changed and he nodded. I took a deep breath and put both of my hands on his face, "I trust you Edward Cullen, and I know that you think that by me not telling anyone I'm only going to get worse, but I'm not. I can't tell anyone or else Mike will kill them. He told me face to face that he would and I believe him. That's part of the reason why I didn't tell you. But I just needed someone to know, and you're the one who I would trust with my life. And maybe in time I will tell the others, but for right now it's only you."

Edward smiled and helped me up. Afterwards Edward and I decided not to go to any other class and he drove me home.

Once I was home I took a shower and cooked dinner. I then turned on the tv. and waited for the others to come home. I walked into my room and grabbed the letter that I'd locked up in my desk drawer.

_Dear Bella,_

_I can't wait to see you again._

_With love, Your dearest boyfriend_.

I sighed, this wasn't good. He could show up any day, anytime. I shivered involuntary, the most scariest part was he could hurt anybody, anytime. I closed my eyes, my family, my friends, hell even Josh...gone. And Edward, especially Edward. I crumpled the letter and threw it in the garbage.

I suddenly felt very sick. I ran to the bathroom and threw up. I moaned, this isn't good, I stayed in the bathroom until the others arrived. "Bella?" called Victoria, "In here!" I said as she walked passed the already opened door. "Oh no! You caught the flu!" She yelled and jumped back a couple feet. I grasped my head, "Not so loud, my heads already thumping to fast for it's own good."

Victoria apologized and got James to carry me to my room. Laurent came in a second later with some water and crackers. I smiled as he sat down on my bed, "Is there anything else I can get you?" He asked. "No, I'll be fine...minus the puking you might hear." He chuckled, "That's okay...I hope you get better." I nodded as he got up to leave.

Sadly, the fever didn't go down at all as the night progressed. I groaned and moaned all night, I could never get comfortable and it seemed that the hours that passed were dragging.

It was only one thirty in the morning when I decided the hell with it and ran to the bathroom. I puked, of course, but the temperature was much cooler in here. The hot flashes I was having were very discomforting.

I groaned again as I puked again. After I was sure I wasn't going to throw up anymore, I picked myself up slowly and walked at a turtle's pace to get back to my room. I slept without the covers and waited for the air condition to come on. I even had my window cracked. I actually fell asleep after that. But I woke up an hour later to nightmares, I was so exhausted that I didn't even have it in me to scream. Next, because of the sudden movement, I had to run to the bathroom again.

After that I was freezing, so I had to undo everything that I practically just did. It got even worse as the night came along, I was now in between freezing and burning up. Miserable would be an understatement to what I was going through, I wanted to cry, but I was too exhausted. By the time night vanished, I was still going through hell. I barely had enough energy to pick up my cell phone, let alone open it. I was shaking like crazy and all I wanted to do was sleep.

I dialed Alice's number, "Hey Alice, it's me Bella." I said hoarsely, "Oh, Bella, you sound awful." She replied. I rolled my eyes, "Yeah, I feel awful too, I'm sick---"

"Your SICK!" yelled Alice, I moved the phone away from my ear, "Yes Alice, you know, throwing up, no energy, that kind of sick." I snapped, "Throwing up?" Asked Alice in a small voice. I sighed, "Yes Alice, throwing up, no sleep, loss of energy, runny nose, migraine, the achy feeling-- the sole purpose of being sick!" I snapped, damn I wasn't making any sense today.

"Geez, okay, sorry." Mumbled Alice, I sighed again, "No I'm sorry, I didn't get any sleep last night and now I'm a bit crabby."

"A bit?" muttered Alice, I stifled a laugh, "Yeah, so listen, I have the flu so I'm not coming to school today, do you think you could bring me my homework?" I asked, "Of course Bella." I smiled, "Thanks." I said, "No problem. I really hope you get better." I laughed...but it soon turned into a coughing fit, "Thanks Alice, I hope so too. The last thing I need is another night from Hell." She laughed and hung up. I sighed as I tried to go to sleep.

----------

I woke a couple minutes later to run to the bathroom.

"Dammit! Whoever woke me up is seriously going to regret it!" I muttered as I walked back into my room. It was then that I noticed my phone was the culprit. I put it on vibrate, stupid noise.

"What!" I snapped into the phone, "Sorry for calling you like this, but I can't bring you your homework." Said Alice, she sounded just as pissed as I was. "Why?" I croaked, and glanced at the clock, school was over? The clock read four forty-five, damn, looks like those minutes turned to hours. "Because Mr. Varner gave me detention." Snarled Alice.

I narrowed my eyes, damn you Mr. Varner. I sighed, "Well, that's okay, I'll just get it when I can." There was a brief pause, "What do you mean? I sent Edward to give you your homework." I froze. Edward...was coming...here? It's not that I didn't want him over here, it's just that I didn't want Edward to see me like this. "Bella, are you upset about something?" Asked Alice, I then realized that I was quiet for a very long time, "No, No, I'm glad you sent Edward....Bye." I said and hung up. I didn't want Alice to ask anymore questions so I kept it brief. Even I could hear the straining in my voice. That wasn't good. I decided not to get so worked up about this. So I drifted off into another dreamless sleep.

The next thing I awoke to, was the sound of someone in my room. I quickly snapped my eyes open, "Shit!" Jumped Edward as I called his name. I immediately ran to the bathroom. "Wait there a minute!" I yelled from down the hall. I stayed in the bathroom for at least five minutes before I could even sat up straight. I slowly made my way back to my room. Edward was standing in the exact same spot from when I left him.

"Feeling better?" he mumbled as he followed me to my bed. I groaned and turned over on my stomach, "Just leave the stuff on my desk...I'm sure you have some other place to be than to watch me suffer. Unless you're some kind of sadist and like that..." I said and buried my head into my pillow. I heard him move around and thought he was leaving...until I felt his hand on my head, "What are you doing?" I asked, I didn't have enough strength to open my eyes, or even move my head.

It seems the only time I ever found any energy was when I had to run to the bathroom. "I'm checking your temperature...but your making it slightly difficult to check when your face is in your pillow." I slowly turned my head to face him, I saw him smile a little bit.

"Thanks." I mumbled as he pressed his hand against my forehead. It felt good on my hot stuffy face, it was still cold from being outside. "Your fever has gotten really bad hasn't it?" he asked, I nodded, "You wouldn't believe the night I had." I said weakly, he half smiled.

He stayed in my room for two full hours, he only left for a brief moment but came back shortly afterwards with a bowl of soup and crackers. I frowned, "Why are you doing this?" I whispered, his eyebrows knitted together, "What do you mean?" he asked, I closed my eyes, they were so hard to open again, "Why are you here, giving me my homework, staying just to take care of me, making me dinner? I thought you'd want to stay away from me after yesterday."

Edward knitted his eyebrows together, "Why would I want to 'stay away from you'" I smiled glumly in return. "Because I have a phsyco ex coming after me...and I thought you'd feel out of place" I whispered, Edward set down the bowl of soup on my desk and then walked over to me, he placed his fingers under my chin and lifted my face up to meet his eyes, "I couldn't stay away from you Bella, even if I tried. I'm never going away." he said with a smile. I smiled too but our eyes betrayed our forced expressions and we both saw pain and loneliness in them.

I put my hand to his face, he didn't flinch, or yell, he just smiled. I looked in his eyes again, they showed even more pain and loneliness. Edward came down closer to me and kissed my forehead. I smiled, then sighed. "I guess Josh is out of the question huh?" I saw Edward's eyes flash warningly as I said Josh's name. I also so pain....I had no idea how hurt Edward really was. He held his mask up so well yesterday, and the day before, and....exactly how long has he been in this hurt?

I heard him sigh, "You don't have to Bella, not if you don't want to." I stared at him in disbelief, he put the fake smile back on, "I was being a bastered yesterday, I have no control over who you date...you're right though, I did have my chance, but I couldn't take it...all I'll say now is be careful...I wasn't kidding when I said that Josh is the biggest player in California."

I just stared at him, "So...you want us to be friends?" I asked, he nodded, "If you want." he said.

I rolled my eyes, "I want to be more than that..." He smiled and then I felt my stomach lurch, "Excuse me a minute!" I said as I ran toward the bathroom again. I came back and laid down, "Ugh! It's going to be a long night again."

I moaned as I felt my body go limp. Edward put the soup up to my face, "Eat." He instructed while I groaned, "I'm not hungry. I'll just barf it up anyway." Edward didn't move the bowl. "Eat." He said again. I sighed in defeat and ate the soup, then the crackers, then asked for a refill of soup, "See, I knew you were hungry." Said Edward in triumph, I rolled my eyes, "Thanks." I muttered as he walked out the door, "Anytime." He said with a wink and a smile.

He came back fifteen minutes later, "Here you go." He said as he gently put the soup down on the bed. I sat up again, I was just about to take a bite when something occurred to me.

"Aren't you afraid that you'll get sick?" I asked, Edward thought about that. "No, I have a pretty tough immune system." He chuckled, I rolled my eyes, "_Yeah _right_._" I mumbled as I started eating. "So, When does your band buddies get home?" asked Edward.

I glanced at the clock, it was eight. "They should be home any minute now." Edward raised his eyebrow but as I predicted, a couple minutes later I heard James yell, "We're home!" Edward smiled, "That's my que to leave." I smiled and looked up at him, "Okay." Edward slowly turned around, but then hesitated. "Unless...you want me to stay?"

My eyes widened, and before I could even stop myself I smiled, "Would you?" I asked, "I mean, you don't have to it's just---"

"I'd love too." he said sincerely. I grinned as he came to sit near my bed again. "And you're sure your not scared about getting sick?" I asked, he chuckled, "I'm positive." As I laughed, James, Victoria and Laurent came in.

"Oh, hey Edward...we didn't know you were here." Said Laurent as he looked back and fourth between Edward and I.

I laughed again, how could they even assume that anything was going on between us, especially when I am SICK. Laurent took my laughter as a signal that nothing happened and relaxed. Edward smiled, "Is it alright with you three if I spend the night?" he asked, they all looked to me and I practically pleaded them to say yes. James narrowed his eyes, "Yes, that's cool...Just try not to keep Bella up." he said, Edward put his right hand over his chest and raised hist left. "Scouts honor." He said which caused all of us to laugh.

The others soon left and it was just me and Edward again. "Thank you, for staying." I said as I rubbed my eyes, I wanted to go to sleep so bad, but I was scared that if I woke up tomorrow he wouldn't be here. "Go to sleep Bells. You need it." He said as he got up. "Where are you going?" I asked drowsily, "I'm sleeping on the couch, remember?" I smiled, "Oh yeah." And like a light, I was out. I faintly heard him chuckle and the gentle closing of a door.

----------

I sprang up from my bed just in time to run to the bathroom, I quickly got the worst part over and gently walked back into my room. I had woken up from another nightmare and as always I was sweating and had hot tears spilling from my eyes. I was shaking as I crawled into my bed again. I didn't lay down, I just wrapped my arms around my legs and pulled them up to my chest. I buried my head between my knees and started to cry. I was so miserable.

"Bella?" Whispered Edward as he slowly cracked open my door. "Yes?" I whispered back, he opened the door all the way, the only light that shown was that from the hall. I had cut it on so I could see the bathroom. "Are you okay?" He asked, I nodded, "Tonight has been better than last night." He sat on my bed and looked so cute, he was still in his clothes from earlier today, only he looked tired and worried and his hair was messy.

Edward ran his fingers through his hair, "Care to tell me why your shaking like a leaf?" He asked, his voice was a little slurred because he was still half asleep, but firm. I sighed, "I had another nightmare." He wrapped an arm around my shoulders and pulled me closer to him, "You never get a break from those things huh?" he said, I laughed bitterly, "You just don't know...the worst part is that they've only gotten worse." His arm subconsciously tightened around my shoulders, I leaned my head on his shoulder, and took in his scent, he smelled so good.

Thank goodness my stuffy nose was gone. That meant I was getting better. I clung closer to him, I was going through the shivering stage of my fever, he gently put me back in my bed and wrapped me up. "Is it okay if I lay next to you?" He asked. I smiled, he was actually asking permission? Awww, he didn't want to upset me, he was so thoughtful. I nodded and he laid down on top of my covers and I snuggled closer to him.

A few minutes later we were both falling back asleep, "Edward?" I said tiredly. "Hn?" he replied, I stifled a laugh, he was so cute when he was tired. "Thank you...for everything." I mumbled, I saw him smile, "Just go to sleep." He said as he playfully whacked my arm. I chuckled, but was soon falling into a peaceful slumber.

----------

The next minute, it was morning. I awoke to the sunrise coming through my window, I looked at the alarm clock, it read six: thirty, I yawned and was surprised when I found Edward's hand around my waist. He was still asleep. I laid back down, no use in waking him. I didn't have to wait very long though, "How do you feel?" He asked as he pulled me closer.

I smiled, "Better. I think the fever's gone." I said, he yawned and sat up, "I can take you to school if you want?" I nodded, "I'd like that." He ran his fingers through his hair, then he grabbed his sweatshirt that was thrown in the floor.

He must have gotten hot and taken it off. He now wore a white t-shirt and Aeropostle' jeans. I yawned again and slowly got up, I wasn't going to press my luck.

When I got up I walked slowly around the room for a couple minutes, I looked at Edward, who was ready to catch me at any minute. "I feel fine...I actually think it's gone." I said as I walked at a normal pace. Edward relaxed and did a sigh, "That is a big relief." he said as he sat back down on the bed. Just then Laurent's alarm clock went off.

"LAURENT SHUT THAT DAMN THING UP!" Yelled Victoria.

Edward looked at me, his hands were over his ears and his eyes were wide, "What the hell?" He said.

"SORRY, I FORGOT TO CUT IT OFF!" yelled Laurent back, but he didn't cut it off, "LAURENT!!!!! I SWEAR TO THE MOTHER OF ALL THINGS THAT ARE NATURAL, IF YOU DON'T FUCKING CUT THAT ALARM OFF, I WILL BURN IT INTO THE SEVEN DEPTHS OF **HELL**!" yelled Victoria.

Edward and I looked at each other and then towards the door. Laurent _still_didn't turn it off. I thought I heard a low chuckle, then I heard a big ------thump------sound and heard Laurent crying, "YOU JUST FUCKING BROKE MY ALARM!" I heard James laughing, "YES! THE CLOCK IS DEAD!" he said. I looked back at Edward, he looked back at me, "Is it always like this?" he said, I chuckled, "Pretty much." He gave me a horrified look, I rolled my eyes and walked out of the room, "I'm going to take a shower." I said as I walked down the hall.

I took a shower, got dressed, and then cleaned the bathroom and stripped my sheets. I sanatized my bedroom and the bathroom and met the others out for breakfast. "Mornin' Guys." I said as I sat down beside Laurent and Edward. Victoria, James and Laurent smiled, "Morning." They said, Victoria slided me my breakfast, "Thanks." I muttered as I dug in.

After breakfast I climbed into Edward's Volvo and we raced to school. "Are you sure that your okay?" he asked for the nineteenth time, I rolled my eyes, "Geez, if I wanted to be nagged to death I would have caught a ride with Alice." He scowled, I chuckled, "Well, it's the truth, ever since we woke up, you've been asking me that." I said as I pinched his cheek and laughed.

He huffed, I patted his head, "Forgive me?" I asked as I held out my hand, he pursed his lips, "You're forgiven." He said and shook it. We walked around the school campus and then went our separate ways when the bell rang. I came into Trig smiling, but Rose wasn't there, I sighed.

Great, now I was going to have to deal with Mr. Varner alone...wait a minute, I still had Angela. I quickly found her sitting behind Lauren Mallory's desk. I smirked, Lauren hadn't been to the school since that day I kicked her ass. Well she got what she deserved, I waved to Angela to save me a seat, which she did.

"Hey, I haven't talked you since like, Christmas." said Angela as I sat down, I smiled impishly, "Sorry, I've been sick." I said. Wow, understatement of the year, "I heard you've also been ducking the principle...ever since the fight with Lauren and all." she added, I rolled my eyes, "That bitch deserved everything that she got." I mumbled, Angela rolled her eyes and then class started.

Next, I caught up with Jasper and we walked to English together. "So Jazz, where's Rose?" I asked, Jasper frowned. "She and Alice both caught what you had. I think it's passing around the school." He said, I cringed, "Wow, I hope they get better, if it helps, it lasted less then two days when I had it."

Jasper smirked, "I'll be sure to let them know." he said, then frowned again, "I really didn't want to come to school today, I actually wanted to stay home with Alice." he admitted, I knotted my eyebrows together, "So why didn't you?" I asked, he scowled, "Alice made me come." he muttered.

I laughed, "You are so whipped." I said, Jasper's scowl deepened, "Am not, I've said no to her many times." he defended, I rolled my eyes,"Whatever." I replied. "I can't wait to see how Emmett is...did Rosalie _make_ him come too?" I asked, Jasper pursed his lips and looked away, "Yes." he mumbled, I busted out laughing, "That's too funny!" I gasped, Jasper rolled his eyes and opened the door to English.

Afterwards, I caught up with Emmett, "Hey there!" I said as I ran up to him, "How's Rose?" I asked menacingly. He smiled, completely oblivious, "She just called, she's doing fine. She also told me, to tell you, that both she and Alice said hi and sorry they couldn't come."

I rolled my eyes, "Please, It's not like the school's going to maul me if they aren't here...I'm glad there getting better though." I said. Emmett nodded, I smiled, "So did Rose _make_ you come to school as well?" I asked, Emmett turned red. "No! I wanted to come!" he snapped, I laughed, "I've already talked to Jasper, you're so whipped." I yelled as I ran down the hall.

Emmett was chasing me until we both made it to our destinations. "I am not whipped!" he snapped for the hundredth time, I rolled my eyes, "_Right, _whatever you say Emmett." I said as I walked into History. I saw Emmett huff in aggravation and stomp his way to biology. I chuckled, this was too fun.

-----------

After History, I walked to the cafeteria, though I didn't get very far because I was tripped.

"Hey Bella." snarled Jessica, I rolled my eyes and picked myself off the floor, "Hello Jess, what the hell to do want?" I snapped, Jess smirked, it was then that I realized I was surrounded by whores. Jessica, Katie, Tyler, and Austin all formed a circle around me.

"We just want to talk...we don't like what you did to Lauren and we want payback." snapped Tyler. He must have been her latest fling. I pretended to feel sorry for Lauren, "Aww, yes, how is Lauren doing? _I _heard that she and _Jess_ got into a really bad fight at lunch...is she okay?" I asked sweetly.

Jess's face turned red, "You set me up you bitch!" She snarled and slapped me, "HEY!" I heard someone yell, it sounded like Jacob. "Bella, are you okay?" he asked, "Yes, I'm fine. It was just a slap." I said and together, we walked to lunch. "Where's Angie?" Jacob smiled, "I'm meeting her in the cafeteria."

----------

"Hey guys." I said as I sat down where Emmett and Jasper were seated, Edward was here also. "Hey." They said in unison. I looked to the table next to us and smirked as Angela and Jacob snuck up behind Jessica and all the other whores, with a whole bucket of melted Jello.

"So, how was class?" asked as I glanced back at the guys, then at Angela, who winked. Emmett and Jasper groaned, "Boring." They said, I chuckled, "Isn't all your classes? Though I think this might cheer you up." Emmett and Jasper knotted there eyebrows in confusion, I quirked my head over to Jess's table and they followed my inquire.

I nodded, signaling Angie and Jake to to pour the Jello. "COMPLIMENTS OF THE CHEF!" they yelled as they let the jello go. Fortunately it went all over Tyler Crowley and Austin Marks as well. "SWAN!" They yelled, Emmett, Jasper, Angie, Jacob, Edward and I all laughed and ran out of the cafeteria.

Tyler got up and glared at me, Jasper ran off with Angie and Jake, and Emmett and Edward followed me. Tyler and Austin came after me and Emmett, Edward disappeared, while Jess, Katie, and the others went after Jasper, Angela and Jacob.

"I'M GOING TO GET YOU! BELLA!" Yelled Tyler, Emmett went left and I took a right, "Good luck Emmett!" I yelled as we split up, "You too Bells!" he replied as he ran even faster from Austin. I ran behind a jock name Ben Cheney.

Who ratted me out, when he saw Tyler's furious face, thus giving me another run around the school until I ran into a closet and found Edward...I tried not to be curious, I trusted him and that's all that mattered. "Where did you go? You were right behind me and then -poof- you disappeared!" He said as I hid behind him.

"Just shut up, Tyler will be in here in exactly ten seconds, therefore all you have to say is 'She's not in here, lost track of her' and then he'll leave." I said, Edward gave me a confused look, "But then won't he chase me?" I laughed, "You're the quarterback of the football the team, the coaches favorite, and you're the captain. What do you think Tyler will do when you tell him to back off?"

Edward didn't have time to respond because the door swung open. Edward moved closer to me and kissed me. I kissed him back, "Where is she?" Said Tyler through clenched teeth, I gritted mine. How dare he interrupt me and Edward? "Where's who?" asked Edward who was hiding my face away from my chaser. I was nervous but was definitely enjoying every minute of the kissing part.

"Bella." Snarled Tyler, Edward raised his eyebrow, "I haven't seen her since lunch, sorry." Said Edward, "Dammit!" shouted Tyler, "When I find her, she will hanged up on the tree in the football yard until she's blue!" He yelled, I swallowed hard. "That was some stunt she pulled."Said Edward, Tyler stayed quiet, "......." Edward Laughed, "Shut up!" snapped Tyler.

Edward raised his eyebrows, as if expecting an apology.

"Sorry man" said Tyler and closed the door. I was about to say thank you but Edward stopped me, "Shhh." he said, I froze and looked towards the door, it was then that I saw Tyler's shadow. We stayed quiet for a couple more minutes before we heard Tyler sneak away.

"Edward, that was bloody brilliant!", I yelled and hugged him, Edward carressed my cheek, trying to hide the aggravation of Tyler's stupidity that started this whole thing. (Well it was really Angie and Jake b ut I just leave that out.)

"Jake told me that Jessica and her gang tried to corner you." I rolled my eyes, "I'm fine." I said, there was an awkward silence, "Welp, I'm just gonna go now." I said as I headed for the door, Edward grabbed my hand. I jumped and he immediately let go, "I'm sorry." He said. I smiled, "It's not your fault." I said and walked out of the closet. Edward followed.

After hiding until the bell rang for next period I quickly ran to biology and prayed that Tyler wasn't waiting there. I knew Edward would protect me or tell Tyler to leave me alone but he and I both thought it was fun to sneak around the school.

I closed my eyes as I made the turn to the biology door. I snapped my eyes open, whew! He wasn't here. I walked through the door and sat down in my normal seat, Edward came about thirty seconds after I sat down. "Hey!" I said energetically, he smiled, "Hi." I chuckled as I saw a little bit of lipstick in the corner of his mouth, "You've got lipstick right here." I said as I pointed to the spot on my mouth.

He wiped it off but missed a little bit, "Did I get it?" He asked, I nodded, "Yeah except for one spot, here let me get it." I said as I took my thumb and wiped his mouth. I shivered involuntary when my skin made contact with his. He smiled, "So are you playing at the club tonight?" he asked. "Yep, I've already written up some new songs." He chuckled, "That's good...and how are you feeling?" He asked.

I frowned, geez, not this again! "I'm _fine_." I said, he sighed, "I know you skipped lunch. Are you hungry?" He asked, I rolled my eyes, "No, I'll eat lunch later." He rolled his eyes, "Silly girl." he mumbled and pulled out an apple. I raised my eyebrow, he smiled sheepishly, "It was the only thing I could snatch before I had to run to class." he admitted, I smiled and took the apple.

He could be so generous sometimes, "You might want to eat it sometime _this_ year...you know _before_the teacher arrives." He said, I rolled my eyes, then at other times, he could be a total smartass.

----------

After biology we went to music and then gym. I was laughing and enjoying Edward's company when I bumped into Tyler and Austin. "Uh oh." I mumbled and hid behind Edward, who rolled his eyes. Austin and Tyler smiled evilly, "Hello Bella." They said in unison, which added to the dramatic creepiness in there faces.

I glared and clutched Edward's shoulder, "What do you want?" I snapped, Tyler looked at Austin and Austin raised his eyebrows, then they looked back at me, "We want you to come with us for a moment." They said. I raised my eyebrow, how stupid could they get? Edward tensed, he was trying to remain cool but his facade was slowly cracking. The others could tell because they backed off.

"We'll see you after practice then." Said Austin and they walked away. I loosened my grip on Edward's shoulder, "Are they going to hurt me?" I asked, Edward frowned, "No, of course not. I won't let them. They're just really pissed that they actually got pranked...they're usually the ones that do that kind of stuff...they rule the school when they do it." He replied, I mouthed an 'Oh' and waited for gym to start.

Gym was, of course, bad. I totally suck at gym, only Edward and the other jocks play good. Today we did a football game. I sucked even worse at that. Angela did pretty good actually.

----------

After Gym I was talking with Angela when Jess came up to us in the changing room, "You little bitches!" she snapped, I rolled my eyes, "What now Jess? Did pms come early?" Jessica glared, "I heard that Lauren won't be coming back to school for the next two months!" she yelled.

My eyes widened, "Really?!" I said excitedly, I looked at Angela and we both did a happy dance. Jess huffed and stomped away. "One fucking day, you'll get what's coming to you!" she yelled and slammed the door, I ignored her. "One down and five to go!" I said as I high-fived Angie. She laughed and ran to go tell Jacob the 'good news'.

I rolled my eyes and walked out of the dressing room. All of a sudden I was yanked by the arm and pushed into a closet. "HEY LET ME OUT OF HERE!" I shouted, I heard laughter on the other side, "Why should we?" said a gruff voice that I recognized as Austin's.

I huffed, "If anyone finds out about this you are in so MUCH TROUBLE!!!" I yelled, I heard more laughter, "Keyword here is _if_." Retaliated Tyler, "Later bitch!" yelled Jessica as they all ran away. "HEY! LET ME OUT!" I yelled, I tried to opened the door, but it was locked, "HELP!" I yelled again, surely someone had to be coming by.

"HHEEEEELLLLLPPP!" I yelled as loud as I could, but that was drowned out by the school bell. I tried my cell phone, but I couldn't get a signal. I yelled again as loud as I could, but know one came. I was all alone in a dark, little closet.

----------

I don't even know how many hours have gone by, all I know is that school is definitely over, and I'm still in this fucking closet! Not even the janitor opened the door...then again he was deaf, "Help!" I yelled, but my voice had gone hoarse from my previous yelling...not to mention that it was already dry from coming out of my fever.

"Help." I said as I laid down. It was no use, no one was coming, school was over. Looks like I'm spending the night in here. It's a good thing I'm not claustrophobic. But it was unbearably hot in here... I stayed there for another hour, then I heard voices, I quickly got up and banged on the door.

"HELP! HELP ME! PLEASE!" I yelled, and even though it hurt my throat like hell, I kept on doing it. I banged louder and harder on the door and was sure I was going to bruise tomorrow. "Bella?" Someone asked, it sounded like Emmett, "YES, YES IT'S ME BELLA!" I yelled, Emmett tried to unlock the door, "It's locked I can't get in!" He said frantically, there was a moment's silence before he spoke again. "Hold on! I'll break it down!!"

I sighed, "be reasonable Emmett...use you're brain!" Emmett laughed, but it sounded a little hysterical, "Right. Be right back!" he said as I heard him run away. I waited and fifteen minutes later I heard more footsteps. It sounded as if it were at lease four or five people. "Where is she?" Asked a voice, it was Coach Clapp, "She's in the storage closet." Answered Emmett, I then heard the footsteps get nearer and nearer.

I heard a click and the door opened, I was now staring at four faces, Emmett's, Jasper's, Coach Clapp's and Edward's. They were all worried, I just ran up to Emmett and hugged him like no tomorrow, "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" I said and let go of him, the rest just stared.

That's when I realized that they were all in their football uniforms. By the looks on their faces I must have looked like a mess, my face was sweaty and some strands of hair stuck to my face. "Bella, how long were you in there?" asked Edward getting right to the point, "Since the end of Gym class." I said, Edward's face became confused, "I thought you were with Angela?"

I sighed, "I was, but then she left and I walked out of the dressing room and someone jumped me." I explained. "Who did this to you?" Asked Jasper, I could hear anger in his voice, I just looked at him and they all figured it out.

"Tyler and Austin." Said Edward through clenched teeth and his grasp around my wrist tightened just a tiny bit. Coach Clapp looked at all three of them and then at me, "Is that true?" he asked, I nodded, "Yes, they stuffed me in there and when I told them to let me out they ran off." The Coach sighed, "Well Edward, I guess now we know why they ditched practice." he said, Edward just nodded.

"Do you want them to play in the game this Saturday?" asked Coach Clapp, Edward shook his head, "No, two week suspension from practice and games." He replied, the coach nodded and walked away. Emmett and Jasper stayed with me, "I'll take you home." Said Edward and went into the changing room. I looked to Emmett and Jasper, "How much trouble, besides the Gym suspension, are Tyler and Austin?" I asked, Jasper smiled, "In however much trouble Edward decides...since Edward's the star quarterback, the coach just lets Edward decide the trouble. Coach Clapp absolutely adores him." I smiled.

Edward came out a few seconds later, dressed in American Eagle jeans and a long sleeve white shirt. I said bye to Emmett and Jasper and walked with Edward to the parking lot. "I'm sorry, I should have been out there waiting for you when you came out of the changing room, but I thought you were with Angela, so I though----"

"Edward, it's okay." I said as Edward tried to apologize for the third time. He growled in frustration, "No, it's not okay, you were locked in a closet for the last four hours. Your voice is hoarse from yelling and you look like you've gone through hell."

I rolled my eyes, "I can assure you I've been through worse." Edward's glare softned as he was about to apologize again but I held up my hand to silence him, "You've already apologized once, I don't want to hear it again, it's not your fault." I said as I climbed into his Volvo.

He got in as well, "I can assure you that Tyler and Austin will be in so much trouble that if you didn't know them, you would've thought they would have committed a murder or something!" he said as he started to back out of the parking lot. I sighed, "Edward, don't punish them too bad..." I said, he looked at me incredulously, "What the hell do you mean *imitates girlie voice* 'Don't punish them to bad?' They locked you in a fucking closet for **four** hours!" he snapped.

I closed my eyes, "Jess was with them too, she was probably the mastermind behind it all." I said, Edward rolled his eyes, "Oh please, Tyler and Austin definitely thought of this one, Jessica Stanley has the brains of a tooth pick. There's no way in hell that she could have thought of that..." I laughed darkly, "It's not that hard to think up, Edward, of course she was behind it." I argued back.

Edward sighed, "It involves creativity to actually think of a prank like that...besides, it's an old jock joke, we use to do it to freshmen all the time...of course we wouldn't leave them _that_ long." Said Edward. I stared at him wide eyed, "Edward Cullen! _You_ used to lock freshmen in the closet?!" I said, he smiled sheepishly, forgetting his anger for a moment, "Yep." he said, then his anger returned, "But _I_ didn't leave them! We'd let them out after we were sure they were scared." I rolled my eyes, "Typical." I said, he laughed lightly on that.

There was a pause, It was a comfortable one, but I decided to break it. "Why didn't you tell me that you had football practice on Tuesday?" Edward smirked, "I thought you hated sports." He said, I pursed my lips, "I do. But I would gladly watch them...I just don't like participating in them." Edward raised an eyebrow, I raised my to, "So what's your schedule?" I asked.

He smirked, "Why are you so interested?" I shrugged, "You go to my shows, I should go to your practices and games. It's only fair." I said, he sighed, "We have practice everyday from four-thirty to seven-thirty, and our games are on Saturday, the times may differ. I'm surprised you didn't already know my schedule...Alice and Rose love football."

I widened my eyes, "They do? They never talk about it with me." I said, he shrugged, "I guess they are just to busy with other things." he replied. I nodded. Time seemed to fly by and soon I had to get out of the Volvo.

"Thanks Eddie!" I said.

"Eddie?" He said and raised his eyebrow, I blushed, "I mean Edward!" He laughed, "It's okay _Bella_, I like it." He said and drove off after I closed the door. I rolled my eyes, he's never going let me live that one down. I won't hear the end of this for months. I quickly made dinner and then went to the club.

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**I'm so sorry it to forever to update. I was busy with school and Tkd. Thank you to all who reviewed, I truly, truly, _truly_appreciate it. I also appreciate how patient you guys were, so thanks alot!**

**And YES Bella and Edward are together!!! And YES!!! Bella told Edward about being raped!!! I hope that this little treat will help you guys forgive me for not updating in like forever.**

**Sincerely yours,**

**Blink182lover4life.**


	9. Getting better all the time

**Disclaimer:** I do not own, nor will I ever own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Or Breaking Dawn. They all belong to the wonderful author Stephanie Meyer. Any of the songs you see are NOT written by me, they all belong to their respectable owners. No copyright infringement intended.

**Pairings:** Eddie/Bella, Alice/Jazzy, Emmy/Rose, Carlisle/Esme, Jacob/Angela, and Victoria/James.

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For the next two weeks life was perfect, everything was going great. Tyler and Austin had been suspended from practice and games, and the principle got ahold of Jessica and suspended her for two days. None of them had messed with me since then.

Alice and Rose were all better and came back to school the following day, they demanded I fill them in on everything that happened Tuesday and so I did. My date with Josh was cancelled and I was now dating Edward! I sighed, yes life was perfect!

Edward and I were getting along great, and I was actually starting to like football now...I went to Edward's practices and games like a saint. We haven't lost a game yet.

It was now Monday, "LAURENT, SHUT THAT DAMN THING UP!!!!"

As you can see, Laurent's _new_ alarm clock was rudely waking us up. It would have been okay...if this alarm wasn't louder than the old one. He was pretty pissed that Victoria and James killed his old one and so bought one twice as loud, twice as durable, _and_ set the timer to an earlier time...five-thirty a.m.

I sighed as I rolled out of bed, Laurent wouldn't turn off the alarm until we were **all **up and out of bed. I stumbled to the shower and rinsed off, threw some clothes on and drank two cups of coffee. Then when Laurent wasn't looking, I went back to sleep. I woke up later at six-thirty, I brushed my teeth, straightened out my outfit and brushed my hair.

I drove to school in record time and waited for Alice and Rose to arrive. When they did, there was a different air about them. Instead of Alice and Rose's usual happy faces and bubbly additude, they were glum and depressing. "What happened?" I asked, Rose and Alice looked up from there thoughts, "Nothing, family stuff." They said, I raised my eyebrow, they weren't usually so discreet about family stuff.

In fact they never were, I wonder what happened, but I didn't press the subject any longer and after no time the school bell rang.

Rose was gloomily all throughout Trig and so was Jasper and Emmett. Geez, whatever happened must have really been bad.

I sighed as I sat down at lunch, "What's with you guys?" I asked, no one said anything, "Guys? Come on, it's me Bella, your friend?" I said as I waved my hand in front of there faces. Jasper sighed, "Carlisle and Esme went away on a business trip."

I narrowed my eyes, "That's all? You guys are depressed because Carlisle and Esme left?" Alice sighed this time, "They're going to be gone for two months and they left a friend in charge...apparently she caught Edward sneaking out and she warned him not to do it again. The next day he tried to do it again and she...she kicked him out." Alice whispered.

I felt a pang go through my heart, why was Edward sneaking out? Was it to see me? And where was he?

"That's not the worst part," countered Emmett, I stared at him, "She said he wasn't allowed to come back until his parents came home." My mouth dropped, "She can't do that, call Esme or Carlisle!" I said.

Emmett smirked, "We would if we could, but Mom and Dad are doing business somewhere halfway across the world where there's no cell or Internet service." I stared at him incredulously, "Where is Edward now?" I asked, Alice chuckled bitterly, "That's just it, no one knows...We haven't seen him since Friday. What if somethings happened to him."

I laughed, but I couldn't hide the edge of hysteria in my voice, "N-nothing's going to happen to Edward." I said, but I convinced myself about as much as I convinced the others, and that wasn't very far. Of course, we all kept in the back of our minds that this _was_ Edward we were talking about, though we did worry, we none worried to much. Edward was smart and could take care of himself, the thing we were worried about was what he would do...and where would he go? And...why didn't he come to me?

A week had passed and there was no sign of Edward, at school, at home or at practice. He wasn't at any of my shows and I, as well as the others, started to worry more and more. I cancelled my performances more and was spending more time over at the Cullen's house than I ever had.

Going over everyday and sometimes spending the night if I had too. Also, when no one was looking I'd sneak into Edward's room and just sit down on his bed. It smelled so much like him and I worried that I would never see him again. I would sometimes get angry at him because I felt like he abandoned his family and friends...and he didn't say goodbye.

The Cullen's and the Hale's and I all tried to convince Mrs. Denali to let Edward come back home but she refused. It was then that Emmett told me that She never liked Edward because of his status...And because she never liked Esme. Which surprised me, Esme was the nicest anyone could ever ask for!

I eventually learned to dislike this woman very much.

It had now been two weeks since Edward left. Still no sign of him, I sighed as Laurent's alarm clock went off. I didn't move though, I stayed in bed until almost seven-thirty, "Bella, we're leaving. Are you sure you want to stay? You can always come with us." Said Victoria as she sat on my bed.

I sighed and sat up too, "No thanks Vikki, the Cullen's need me." Victoria smiled and gave me a hug. "Okay kiddo, be careful. We'll be back in a month." She said and I followed her out the door. Today was Saturday and Victoria, James, and Laurent were all going on a field trip to North Carolina for a Biology project. They were going to be gone for a month and I was going to be here alone...I was still kind of creeped out about that.

It had been weeks since I got my Mike's letter, and still no sign of him....I was scared to be alone. I wanted to go with Victoria so bad but I had to stay dutiful to the Cullen's. Their brother was missing, my boyfriend. I quickly hugged James and Laurent, kissed them both on the cheek and watched them all climb into a taxi and leave. I sighed, today was going to be a long day.

I mostly did nothing all day except mope around and wait for Alice to call, but she never did. I was faintly wondering if she even needed my support anymore? I turned on the TV and watched soap operas for the rest of the day.

I kind of taken a liking to them, it was very confusing though. Especially when you started watching them in the middle of all the drama.

It was eleven o' clock at night when my phone rang, I groaned. "Hello?" I said groggily, "Bella!" Whispered Alice. I jumped, "Geez Alice, not so loud!" I snapped, "Bella, I know where Edward is!"

I froze, "Bella?" she whispered again, I quickly snapped out of my haze, "Where?" I said hastily. "He's at a bar not far from your house...He's completely drunk. The bartender had to call me, I was the first person in his contacts." She said, I narrowed my eyes, this wasn't like Edward, "I'd go get him, but Mrs. Denali has got us all on lockdown here, she doesn't want us hanging out with you anymore... can you believe that? She thinks you're a _bad influence_ because you're Edward's girlfriend and thinks you're one of his flings." She continued, but I ignored her, "What's the name of the bar?" I asked as I put on my pants, jacket and shoes. "Red Dye...It's about ten miles away." She said, "Bye!" I said and ran out the door.

I drove way past the speed limit as I hastily made my way to Red Dye's. I opened the bar doors and went up to the bartender, "Hey, I'm here for Edward Cullen." I said, the guy pointed to a person in the very back of the room.

I smiled and went to the table. I sat down, and looked at him. He had on a jean jacket and a long white sleeve shirt underneath, and a pair of American Eagle jeans. His arms were on the table and his face on his arms, his hand sloppily held a beer. Surrounding him were probably eight Vodka shots and a half bottle of tequila.

Damn he could really take his alcohol. I sighed as I tapped him on his shoulder, he didn't move, so I thwacked him on the head. "Shit!" he yelled as he almost fell out of his chair, "You're so wasted." I said, he looked up to me.

"Bella?" he slurred, I nodded, "Yep." He grasped his head, "My head hurts." I rolled my eyes, "No duh!" I said and thwacked him again, "Fuck! Don't do that!" He snapped, but I could barely understand him. "C'mon, let's go home." I said and helped him up. He drunkenly swung one arm around my shoulders as both my arms wrapped around his waist.

He couldn't walk straight and kept stumbling, "Ow! That's my foot!" I snapped, "Sorry." He slurred uncaringly, "Ow! That's my other foot!" I yelled and then he accidently stepped on my foot again. I sighed in aggrivation, I went up to the bartender and tossed him two hundred dollar bills and walked out to my truck.

"Get in the car." I said as he started to laugh. "What's so funny?" I asked as he continued to laugh. He didn't answer so I rolled my eyes and took him by the wrist. I put Edward in the passenger's seat and buckled him in. Then I climbed in and started to drive away, there was an awkward silence, it didn't break until I finally reached home.

"Alright, let's get you out." I said as I opened the door, Edward stumbled out and grabbed onto me for support. I led him up my front porch steps and into the house, I then set him on the couch. "I am seriously going to pass out." He said as I gave him glass of water, "Well it serves you right! I really hope you get the worst hangover possible!" I scolded, he covered his ears, "And if you keep yelling like you are, I'll be sure to get just that."

I glared, even when drunk, he can be a smartass. I went to the kitchen to get him more water but when I came back he was already asleep on the couch. I sighed as I dragged him to my bedroom and laid him on my bed. I wrinkled my nose, he wreaked of alcohol. I then grabbed a blanket out of Victoria's room and curled up on the couch and fell asleep.

It was the middle of the night when I woke up, drenched in sweat. I took a deep breath and looked at the clock, it was two in the morning. I decided to go check on Edward. When I opened the door I was shocked. Edward was shaking and drenched in sweat, I went over to check his pulse, it was fine. I checked his temperature next, it was high, he had a fever.

I quickly ran to the kitchen and put a washcloth in cold water. I dabbed his head and stroked his face, "It's okay, shhh." I said as I tried to calm him down, he slowly opened his eyes, "So----cold!" He choked and shivered once more, his voice was hoarse. I wrapped him up in more blankets and dabbed more sweat off his face, "Just hold on I'll get you a new cloth and a glass off water."

But as I tried to walk away he grabbed my hand, "S-stay, p-please! I-I want you t-to stay." He choked out again, I felt my eyes water, he looked so sick....I nodded and ran my fingers through his hair repeatedly. I started to hum a soothing lullaby to him and eventually he calmed down and fell into an uneasy slumber. Instead of going back to the couch I stayed there, right beside him, I knelt down by my bed and held his hand. It was uncomfortable, but I wasn't going to leave him. I kissed his forehead and then tried to go to sleep as well.

I woke up early that morning, Edward's fevr was gone so I decided to cook breakfast. I faintly thought about letting Laurent's alarm clock wake Edward up for getting himself drunk...but I figured he should get some sleep while he can...then again, he was the one who left without a word to anybody...I sighed as I turned the alarm off.

Laurent had 'forgotten' the alarm clock and called me just and hour after he left to tell me to take care of it. I laughed, Laurent was too funny. I ate breakfast in silence and watched TV turned down very low. I heard my phone ring, I was sure it was Alice. I looked at the caller ID, yep, it was her.

"What's up?" I asked, "Bella, did you get Edward? Is he okay?" She asked, I smiled, "He's sleeping off a hangover as we speak." I said and she sighed in relief, "Thank God he's okay, I'm coming over as soon as he wakes up. Call me okay?" I nodded, "You know I will." I said and we hung up. I watched TV until lunchtime and decided to make some lunch.

"What smells so good?" Asked Edward as he walked over to the couch. "Fettuccine Alfredo." I said and drained the noddles. I poured in the sauce and stirred. Then I cut the burner off and brought Edward a plate. "I'll be right back." I said.

I came back a minute later holding Laurent's alarm clock in my hand. It started to ring and Edward covered his ears, "GOD DAMMIT SHUT THAT THING UP!" He yelled, I smiled, "That'll teach never to drink again." Then I pressed the off button. "And here's a pain reliever for your hangover." I said and gave him a glass of water to wash it down. "Thanks." He said, I nodded and we both ate in silence.

After lunch I cleaned the kitchen while Edward slept on the couch. I decided to clean my room and the rest of the house as well. "Bella?" I heard, "Yeah?" I answered, "What happened last night?" Asked Edward, I chuckled, "You don't remember? Figures." I said and Edward shook his head, I sat down on the couch as did Edward, "Well, I got a call from Alice begging me to get you, she got a call from a bartender and he said that you were totally wasted and needed a ride home. So I went down and picked you up. Afterwards, you passed out and I let you sleep in my room."

Edward squinted his eyes, "Is that all?" he asked, "Well, you did have a high fever last night." I said, he mouthed an 'Oh'. I rolled my eyes, then became serious, "Edward?" I asked, he looked up, "Yeah?" I sighed, "You had us all worried....You didn't call, you didn't write...yo-you didn't even say goodbye." I stopped, "I'm sorry. I didn't know what to do." I frowned, "You could have come here, you could have come to school, why didn't you?"

He shrugged, "I don't know, I guess I was too ashamed to really think about anything else." I knotted my eyebrows together, "That brings me to another question, I heard that you were sneaking out of your house...why?" Edward laughed, "I was doing it to spite Mrs. Denali. She hates me and I don't really know why.... She hates my mom for some reason too..."

I smiled relieved that it wasn't anything serious, "By the way, Alice wanted me to call her when you woke up, so if you'll excuse me." I said and pulled out my cell phone. Edward rolled his eyes, "Hello?" Asked Alice. "Hey!" I said energetically, "Bella! Is he awake?" Whispered Alice excitingly, "Yes, why are you whispering?"

"Mrs. Denali is right beside my bedroom door. She doesn't want me talking to you." She replied, "Oh yeah, I forgot. Well how are you going to come over?" I asked, I saw Edward give me a puzzled look, "I'm going to lie and sneak away." she said, "Sneak away?" I repeated, Edward gestured for me to hand him my phone, which I did.

"Hello?" I heard Edward say, he was silent while Alice spoke, "No Alice, don't...she'll catch you." I heard him say, I was now worried, "Edward what's going on?" I asked, but Edward ignored me, "Oh, _oh_. I get it...okay see you in an hour Sis." he said and handed me my phone. I stared at him, he smirked, "She's going to go with Rosalie and Emmett and say she had some kind of activity to go to after school. She's going to have Angela and Jacob in on it just in case she tries to call. Then Alice is going to come here. She's bringing the others as well." He said, I sighed in relief.

An hour later Alice, Rose, Emmett, and Jasper busted through the door, "Edward!" They yelled as he hugged them all, "Hey guys!" He said and ruffled Alice's hair. I smiled, they were all so happy. A couple minutes later we were all in a circle on the living room floor.

"So Edward, is this what you've been doing for the past two weeks?" Asked Alice, Edward nodded, "Yeah, I got a fake license that said I was twenty-two and went into all the clubs." He said, Alice shook her head in disappointment, "That's just not like you Edward."

Edward nodded and half smiled. "Were there any hotties?" Asked Emmett, both Rosalie and I looked at him with death glares that promised violent retribution. Emmett cleared his throat, "I mean do you have a place to stay?"

Edward shook his head and laughed, "I've just been chilling at the clubs and sleeping out in my car." He said, I slung my arm around him, "You can stay here until Victoria and the others come back." Edward smiled and playfully rolled his eyes, "Thanks."

"What are girlfriends for?" I asked. He smiled, "You're worth everything I have." Then he kissed me and Emmett and Jasper started singing _'Edward and Bella sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G' _I swear, sometimes they could act exactly like five year olds!

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We were all laughing and having a great time until Mrs. Denali called and made her and the others come home. As soon as they left I curled up on the couch and turned on the TV. Edward joined me a little later, we were both in particularly good moods. "So, were you serious about me staying here?" He asked, I laughed, "Duh!" I said and gently thwacked his head, he laughed too.

"So, when are they coming home?" he asked, I sighed, "A month, they went on a biology field trip to North Carolina."

"Oh, well, that works out great! My parents are going to be home sometime around then as well." He said, I smiled, but not at what he said, just because he was here. Safe and sound, not drinking away his troubles or sleeping in his car...."What?" He said, oops! Apparently I stared at him a little too long.

"Nothing, it's just....." I trailed, he raised his eyebrow, "Just what?" He asked, I sighed again, "Your here....I'm glad...you had us all worried." I said, he frowned, "I'm sorry.....I just....didn't know what to do." He said, I smiled sincerely, "It's okay....the point is, your back and that's all that matters." I said and gave him a hug. He hugged me back.

I sighed, "I rather like that your here, I wasn't looking forward to spending two weeks alone." I admitted, I heard him chuckle, "Feelings mutual." He said and hugged me tighter. I kissed him and then pulled away, "Oh and by the way, if your living in my house you have to follow three rules." I said, he let me go and raised his eyebrow, "And just what might they be?" He asked.

I smiled, "No house parties, no surprises and absolutely No Drinking. I just, I don't like it when people drink it reminds me too much of home." I said, he narrowed his eyes, "Home? Why home?"He said alarmed. I shrugged "It's just-it's my parents....they're both alcoholics. Part of the reason why I left Fork's was because them. They were just not good for me." Edward half smiled, "Is there any other complications that I should know about?"

I thought about letting him in on the letter from Mike...but I didn't want him to worry. I knew I would have to tell him sooner or later, and I would, but just not now. "Let's just say that this is all for now...it seems that whenever I turn a new page in my life more complications arise..." Edward smiled, "Fair enough." I patted him on the head. "Good boy."

Afterwards, around eight, I decided to make dinner. We ate and talked and watched movies, then we went to bed. "You can sleep in any room you'd like, you really don't have to sleep on the couch." I said, but Edward being the difficult and stubborn boy that he is, just shook his head and laid down. "Nope, I'd feel more comfortable on the couch." He said and wrapped himself up in the blankets. It was one in the morning. I rolled my eyes, "Fine, but when you can't go to school tomorrow because of your backache, don't blame me." I said and went into my room. I was soon asleep.

_I was walking outside of Cali-High when I heard someone stalking me, "Who's there?" I asked, I heard something move behind me, I quickly turned around, but I saw nothing. Then I heard something move to the side, I snapped my eyes over there, shit, still nothing. "I swear, if you don't leave I'll call the cops!" _

_"Silly little girl." Said an ice like voice, I froze. My breathing picked up and my heart raced with fear. I thought it would beat right out of my chest. "Where are you?" I asked shakily, I heard the voice chuckle, "I'm everywhere. I'm at your school, I'm in your home, I'm with your friends and family, anywhere you are...I am." He said, I shivered. All of a sudden I felt an arm pull me into the nearest woods...which somehow turned into the nature trail woods back at Forks. _

_"Stop! Please!" I yelled, he didn't stop. He started kissing my neck, he forced my top off, I kicked, yelled, screamed, punched, squirmed, scratched and bit him. He didn't move. The next thing that happened was a knife being put to my throat, "Scream, or move, and you die." He said in a low maniac voice. I squeaked and stayed perfectly still._

_I cried as he continued to kiss me and unclothe me. Then, when I thought all hope was gone, Edward came. He looked wounded, "Edward!" I yelled hoarsely as he picked me up and held me, he was shaking, so was I. "Edward, please don't go, don't leave me, he'll be back, he'll hurt me!" I cried, Edward didn't respond. I put my hand to his face but quickly withdrew, I stared at my hand, it was red, blood red. And Edward's skin, it was so cold, I looked at him, he was so white. _

_Then it all clicked, Edward was stabbed and was dying, "Oh my God!" I yelled as Edward collapsed. All of a sudden I felt something tapping me on my shoulder, I turned around and saw a zombie like thing, it was Seth. I looked behind him, there were the zombies of my family and friends. Seth then took out a bloody knife and pointed it passed me, I turned my head. _

_It was M__ike, my attacker, rapist, and my ex boyfriend. I turned back to Seth and screamed as I saw him disintegrate into dust right in front of me, I turned back around, but found no one, I was all alone. I could feel myself losing consciousness and fast, I felt my skin become colder and everything grew darker, I turned around and faced my ex, he was smiling, "Now, you will tell no one."_

"AAAAAHHHHHHHHGGGGGG!" I screamed and Edward busted through my door, I was panting and crying at the same time, "He's coming! He's going to kill me! I know it!" I cried as Edward pulled me into a hug, "Who? Who's coming?" he asked and rubbed my back, "Mike!" I cried even harder, Edward just kissed the top of my head and held me tighter, "Why?" He said gently, I was still panting heavy, "You should know why." I said.

He rubbed my back and held me tighter, "No he won't, I won't let him. I'm here Bella, everything will be alright. He won't hurt you again."

He started whispering comforting words into my ear, I was thankful that he didn't stop. "Please don't leave me, don't die!" I cried as a flashback of Edward in my dream came back, Edward held me tighter, "Bella, I'm not dying, shhh, You were just dreaming, nothings happened. Nothings going to happen, I'm not going to die and I'm not going to leave you." He said firmly.

I just wrapped my arms around his waist. We both didn't go to sleep that night, I just cried while Edward comforted me, and rocked me back and forth. I needed him, more than ever tonight. I wanted to stop crying and kiss him until the sun came up but I was frozen to the spot. "Thank you." I whispered, he ignored me and kept rocking me back and forth, still trying to soothe me.

----------

That morning I stayed in bed, both Edward and I skipped school. Edward decided to cook breakfast, he actually cooked! I looked up as he brought me an omelet and toast with some orange juice. "Thanks." I said and started eating, he nodded and started eating as well. Edward kept sending me worried glances, I just pretended like I didn't see them and kept on eating.

After breakfast, Edward and I decided to go get his car. I drove him down to the bar and he followed me back home. We were now sitting on the couch bored to bits.

"I'm so bored." I said and laid upside down on the couch, "Yeah, me too." Replied Edward. Suddenly Edward stood up, "Quick, get dressed." He said as he put on his jacket and grabbed his car keys. "Why?" I asked, I was still in my pj's.

"We're going to go to the beach." He said and smiled, I stared at him, "We can't go to the beach!" I said, he laughed. "Why not?" I looked at him like he'd grown three heads, "Because it's February!" I said, He lifted an eyebrow, "So?" I just stared at him.

Finally I gave up and smiled too, "Okay, fine." And went into my room to change. I came out with a dark purple long sleeve shirt on and faded blue jeans. I grabbed my jacket and walked to the car. I shivered as the cool February temperature hit me, I was glad that Edward had warmed up the car, it was too damn cold outside.

We drove to the beach in record time and were now sitting in the sand, huddled together. "This is crazy! What were you thinking?" I said, Edward smiled that wonderful crooked grin. "That's just it, I wasn't thinking. This whole idea was just on impulse...very spontaneous, if I do say so myself."

I rolled my eyes. "So, why the beach?" I asked, he shrugged, "It's where Carlisle and Esme used to bring me when I was younger." I sighed as I pictured a younger looking Edward running on the beach with Emmett and Alice, Jasper and Rose. "Tell me about it." I said, He chuckled, "I've been coming to this beach since I was five...ever since we moved here." He started but I cut him off, "You moved here when you were five?"

Edward nodded, "Yep, Dad met mom when they were sixteen and they both came from Ohio. After high school they got married and moved to London and went to college. Years later they went to Gatlinburg, Tennessee. That's where Emmett was born. Then a year later, they moved to Chicago. I was born there, then a year after that, we were in Biloxi, Mississippi. That's where Alice was born. Four years later, we moved here and have stayed here ever since."

I stared at him wide eyed, "So you were really born in Chicago?" I asked, he smiled, "Yep." I smiled too, "You know I wasn't born in Forks." He raised an eyebrow, "Is that so?"

I nodded, "I was actually born in Phoenix, Arizona. I lived there until I was twelve, then I moved to Washington." He raised both his eyebrows. "That's interesting."

I rolled my eyes. "Not really, my step dad lost his job and so we had to move, at first I was mad, but then I thought, 'You know, why not?' That's when I met Victoria, James, and Laurent." He laughed, I smiled.

"That's actually very interesting, I didn't know you had a step dad." He said, I chuckled, "My parent's got a divorce. Yet oddly enough both of them moved to Forks. Only I haven't seen my dad since who knows when."

After a few minutes of silence I decided to switch the subject, "So tell me more about the beach."

He rolled his eyes and smiled again, "When I was six, Emmett taught me how to surf, I taught Alice and she taught Rose. Jasper already knew how. Then at the age of seven, Carlise and Emmett took me to the beach and taught me everything I needed to know about football. I loved it, we used to come out here every summer and have huge cookouts, but as the years went by, we kind of let that tradition fade...I haven't been to the beach in two years." I raised my eyebrows, "Wow." I said, he rolled his eyes, "Whatever." he said.

We sat on the beach and talked and enjoyed each others company until the sun started to set. "We should head back home." I said as we stood up. He nodded and we both ran to the car. I decided to let him drive, but he didn't take me home. Instead, he took me out to dinner, we hadn't had our first date yet and so we were both excited.

As we went into the restraunt he pulled out my chair for me to sit in. I smiled, "Thanks." He chuckled, "No problem." Once we were seated, we ordered. I got the salad and breadsticks while Edward got the steak. Halfway through the meal we started talking. It wasn't about much, mainly about School and the last couple of days.

----------

When we arrived home, Edward took a shower. He came out several minutes later wearing a sky blue, long sleeve top and pajama pants. I too was wearing my pj's as well.

After we came home from dinner, we both decided to have a movie night. "What sounds good? The Haunting or The Strangers?" he asked, I shrugged, "Either one I guess." He nodded and chose The Haunting. We sat curled up on the couch eating popcorn like mad.

"Shit, the girl died!" I yelled as the credits came on, Edward rolled his eyes, "Okay, what movie do you want to watch now? Jaws or The Texas Chainsaw Massacre?" I put my finger to my lip and thought about it, then I smiled, "Let's watch them both!" I said, he looked at the time, it was eleven o' clock, "Do you want to go to school tomorrow?" He asked, I rolled my eyes, "We can get up early." I said, he sighed and put in Jaws.

We watched the whole movie and for some reason, laughed when it was over. Then I put in The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

"Ack!" We both yelled when Leather face killed Chrissie at the end, I looked at Edward, he looked at me, "What?" He asked. I laughed, "You were scared!" He started laughing too, "No I wasn't!" He said and threw a pillow at me. I ducked and chucked it back at him, he ran after me and caught me by the waist.

"Damn!" I cussed as he won our little game, he laughed, "You can't get away from me." I turned around in his arms and looked in his eyes, they showed happiness...and little bit of mischief. I half smiled, he looked so innocent, I laughed at that.

Edward, innocent? Get. Real. "What's so funny?" He asked, I chuckled, "You are."

He raised an eyebrow, I rolled my eyes, "Nevermind." I mumbled and stared in his eyes again.

I inclined my head closer to his, we were only inches apart when he turned his head to the side, "Bella, I have to tell you something." He said, I snapped back "What is it?"

He didn't look at me, "Do you remember that day we went down into you're music room?" I nodded, how could I forget, that was the day I new I needed him. "Do you remember our fight and when I stormed off?"

I nodded again, Edward sighed and took me to the couch. "The truth is, I did love someone..." I stiffened,why was he telling me this? Was he still in love with her? Was he going to leave me?

"Her name was Tanya...she was my best friend. I had known her for years but never really thought of her as a girl...she played any sport you could imagine, she knew all about cars, and was quick to tell you what was on her mind. She had strawberry blond hair and beautiful blue eyes."

From the way Edward was talking I knew he was upset, to say that I was a little jealous was an understatement but she was a person in his past so I wasn't too bothered...but why was he telling me this? So many reasons went through my head.

Was he going to dump me? Maybe he just needed to get this off of his chest...I sighed as he continued.

"It was at a dance when I realized I liked her...she came there looking absolutely beautiful. No one came close to her. That night, I kissed her and we got together. We dated for two years and then one night...we got into a huge argument. She got into her car and drove away."

He stopped and looked at me, "Stupid me should have gone after her. I shouldn't have been so dumb as too hook up with her best friend...but I did. That morning around two I got a call from Emmett saying that Tanya was in a car accident. I drove as fast as I could but she died before I even got there."

I looked at Edward my face twisted in pain and in pity. He sighed, "Her last name was Denali. That's why she hates me..."

I gasped, "Edward...I'm so sorry..." He looked at me and my heart nearly broke, he looked so vulnerable, "Why are telling me this?"

He half-smiled, "Because,you've been honest with me...I thought it was about time I started being honest with you." I smiled, "Thank you."

He nodded, "You should get to bed." He said, I stiffened, the last thing I wanted to do was go to bed. It was the only thing I dreaded every night. "C-can't we just watch another movie? I'm not that tired!" I started to reach for the remote. He grabbed my hand, "What are you trying to avoid Bella?"

I bit my lip, but didn't turn around to face him, "I'm scared." I said barely above a whisper, I heard him sigh, I let him turn me around, "Nothings going to hurt you, I promise. If Mike was going to come and get you then we would've done that already. It's been like what, a year since you last saw or heard from him?"

I bit my lip again and looked down. "It has been a year hasn't it?" He asked, I stayed quiet, I could tell he was getting aggrivated, "Dammit Bella, tell me!" I sighed, "I got a letter from him...a couple months ago."

Edward froze, "When exactly?" He asked, I closed my eyes, "The day I came home from Christmas. That's why I had the breakdown." I saw Edward cringe, I cringed too. I guess that topic was very touchy for the both of us.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He asked, I shrugged, "I didn't know what to say, and I didn't want you to worry..." He ran a hand through his bronze hair, "It's a little late for that." He mumbled. I rolled my eyes, "Just forget it. Forget I said anything, I'm not going to bed and that's final!"

Edward sighed, "Well, even if you did get a letter, chances are he's probably not going to come tonight." I shook my head, "He could come any night, he's everywhere." I said. Edward was about to counter but he stopped himself, "Fine." he said and took his blanket and his pillow and walked me to my room.

"What are you doing?" I asked, "I'm taking you to your room, what does it look like?!" he half snapped, I rolled my eyes in aggravation,"Lay down." He instructed. I did so without any questions, he laid on the other side and turned off my light.

"Goodnight." He said and turned his back to me. I didn't exactly know what expression I was showing, but I know it was somewhat like 'What the Fuck?' "Edward, what are you doing?" I said but he just put his hand up and waved me off, like a person who's on the phone and signaling the other person to shut up.

"Edward you're acting like a twelve year old, stop pouting. If I could've told you sooner I would have but I didn't so deal with it." I said, he didn't respond, I rolled my eyes and walked over to his side. I sat down on my knee's and rested my head and arms on the edge of the bed, "Go away Bella, I'm trying to sleep." He muttered and turned over.

I pursed my lips and walked around to the otherside, "Not until you stop pouting." I said and he turned over again, I chuckled, this was too fun. I walked back around and I flung myself on top of him so he wouldn't turn over again, "What the hell are you doing?" he yelled half shocked.

I smiled as I adjusted myself so that I was sitting on top of him, "Just making sure you don't turn over again." I replied, he huffed and crossed his arms, "Edward, please try to understand, I didn't know what to do...I hadn't told anybody about what happened. I wanted to, but I couldn't."

He rolled his eyes, "I'm not mad." he denied, I laughed lightly, "Oh please, you couldn't fool a preschooler! Your totally pissed because I didn't tell you my secret." Before I knew it he had thrown me off of him and now _I_ was the one underneath, "I'm. Not. Mad." He replied, I smiled, "Then why are you acting like it?" I asked, I wanted to laugh so bad, I could feel his death glare on me.

I sighed, "I told you now...so don't I get a little bit of credit?" He sighed and moved off of me and onto his side, "I guess so." I smiled, "Do you forgive me?" I asked. I waited for him to respond but he didn't, there was another moment of silence before he spoke, "Do you promise to tell me when things like this happen from now on?" he asked, I smiled and cupped his face and put my forehead to his, "Promise." I said and kissed him.

After that Edward was fine, he wasn't pouting anymore and he was genuinely happy. We were both soon asleep. I didn't wake up the whole night, when morning came I heard Laurent's alarm clock go off.

I groaned and put the covers over my head, I heard Edward do the same thing. I covered my ears, but it seemed like the sound was getting louder and louder. I groaned again and stumbled myself into his room. I hit the alarm clock with a loud --thump-- and went back into my room.

I laid back down in my warm bed and snuggled closer to Edward, he was so warm, and I was so incredibly cold.

"Thanks." Edward mumbled and put an arm around my waist, "Hn." I said and went back asleep.

I was woken up shortly after, "Bella, get dressed, we have to go to school!" Said Edward as he pulled back the covers, I slapped his hand away from the fabric and curled back into a ball under them.

"Screw school!" I mumbled and closed my eyes. I heard him sigh and the next thing I knew I was out of my bed and in his arms, "Put me down!" I snapped, he smirked, "I do recall that you said we would wake up early and go to school....now why am I the one dragging you out of bed?"

I rolled my eyes, "Shut up." I said, he laughed and dropped me on the couch. I sighed, took a shower and got dressed while Edward made breakfast Then he took a shower. ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

**Hey guys, hope you liked this chapter! It was a bit choppy and it was pretty long to write but thankfully I did it faster than the other one!**

**Next chapter may take a while, I'm sorry. I really don't know where I'm going with the plot anymore so I trying to get it all figured out. I'll try and update as soon as possible!**

**Please R&R**

**xoxoxo**

**Blink182lover4life ^_^**


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